J is for 'Jaanleva'

First of all, here's the Om-on-exam-paper equivalent for this post.

Thank you, parents of Arjun Rampal. 

For giving the world... Arjun Rampal.  

So Jaanleva is from the 2001 movie Moksha, with a plot that will send your head spinning. Arjun Rampal plays an idealistic lawyer who wants to rob a bank so that he can set up a free legal institute.

Say whaaaaat?!

The song starts with the director mistaking Arjun Rampal for an elephant.

Arjun's clothes are torn and he's bound in ropes. A bunch of dancers are going a little bonkers around him. The very hot Kalpana Pandit (who's a doctor in real life btw) is the heroine's best friend, showing some real cool moves.

One look at her steps and our leading lady Manisha Koirala, who was supposed to join the stage with her, flips out.  

"What is this ya? Why is she hotter and a better dancer than me ya?"

Gathering her insecurity, Manisha Koirala goes and hides in a cave...

...and decides to completes the rest of her performance there itself.

Meanwhile, some weird shit is happening outside. The dancing girls suddenly disappear and Arjun finds himself in a ring of fire. So he does what any sensible man would do in this situation and starts... singing. (Hanuman Chalisa maybe?) 

The Hanuman Chalisa seems to have worked. The fire disappears, the girls appear again and in a welcome reversal of roles, our male Basanti has to naacho in kutton bitches ke saamne!

Even Manisha Koirala, still inside the cave, stops her yoga moves to watch him.

Then they make him turn the water wheel and shake their heads in preparation to shampoo their hair.


He calls out to Manisha Koirala to come rescue him from this crazy buncha ladies.

"Noooo way", she says. "Not while she's out there."

That's it. He's had enough. He can't take it anymore.

So he logs his exit. Quite literally so. 

This gif absolutely needs a repost because he's the only thing that makes everything — especially this song — better.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a leeeetle bit obsessed with this song when it came out. Just a leeeetle bit, ok?

Enjoy Jaanleva! (I know I did.)