Thursday, September 22, 2005

Manaofying 101 lessons by Dad

I think my earliest 'How to manaofy a furious loved one' lessons came from Dad.

When I was a kid, many of my friends in school were Dad's bank clients' children. So I would often accompany him to hang out with my friends whenever he went to meet the clients. They would often serve us mithai and pepsi, neither of which Dad was allowed to take, because of strict orders from his doctor. Sometimes he would refuse the sweets, but he wouldn't say 'no' to the pepsi.


And I would go home and tell on him. Maybe on some levels, I believed that grown-ups were not supposed to make "mistakes" and I was thrilled to have "caught one".

"Mom, pata hai kya? Dad had one full bottle of pepsi at Agarwal Uncle's house today!"

"What??" She charged at him. "After all my efforts to keep your blood sugar in control, you have to go out and have pepsi??"

Dad smiled sheepishly at first. But oh boy, was Mom furious.

"I did not ask for it. They offered it to me..." He tried a meek argument.

"And you accepted it? A full bottle??" She was still fuming.

And then it happened.

He broke into song.

"Sabko maloom hai main sharaabi nahin
Phir bhi koi pilaaye toh main kya karoon?"

("Everyone knows I'm not an alcoholic.
But if they offer me alcohol, what can I do?")

Now there's three reasons why seeing him break into that particular Pankaj Udhas number was so hilarious.

1. My Dad sings like... well, how do I put this diplomatically? Well, let's just say he sings the way I drive. There is not a single musical bone in his body. Really. Really.

2. My Dad's Hindi is like... well, ummm... let's just say it's like... my Hebrew.

3. My Dad is a teetotaller.

Guess that was too much for Mom.

Phir kya hona tha? Kudi hansi toh phansi. :)



56 comments:

patiala pataka said...

Dad smiled sheepishly at first, but oh boy, was she furious.

I think you meant "he"

Sayesha said...

No.

I meant what I wrote.

patiala pataka said...

Sorry to be anal retentive but IMHO it sounds more corect if you say "Dad smiled sheepishly at first, but oh boy, was my mother furious."

Sayesha said...

Ok I've amended it.

Thanks, MAC! :)

patiala pataka said...

yay I'm a MAC!! Finally! Ok got to organise a party for this!

Sayesha said...

Yup you are.

You are mean (M). I don't know you, so you are anonymous (A). And you're a commentator (C).

Am I invited?

patiala pataka said...

NO...because then I won't be anonymmous anymore!

Sayesha said...

You can still be MC.

patiala pataka said...

you mean Mr. Cool...yeah thats me!

Sayesha said...

Ok I'm gonna stop this nonsense at once! :D

Pauna bara baje...
Do paagal blog par mile...
What's goin' on?


Ok I think proximity to the weekend is gettin' to me... halllppp!

patiala pataka said...

yeah tomorrow got work at 7 am...bye bye aunty

Sayesha said...

//yeah tomorrow got work at 7 am

Said the guy who just lectured me on the correct usage of English.

spamtaneous said...

sayesha..somehow i had a feeling that hindi was ur mother tongue

patiala pataka said...

arrey baba, yeh beech mein singlish kambhakt ajati hai!

abhi said...

Arre yahoo messenger has been invented.why chat on a blog's comment space yaaron.

Anyways , I just loved wat ur dad's escape tactic !:)man , i wish my dad had this funny thing about him.mere ghar mein to iss situation mein world war 3 declare ho jati !

Sayesha said...

#Spammy,

My Hindi is too damn good, huh? :P

Actually, I don't identify with any one state as such. Moved around too much for that.

Main hawa hoon, kahin bhi theherti nahin
ruk bhi jaaun kahin par toh rehti nahin
maine tinke uthaaye hue hain paron par
aashiyana nahin hai mera


I belong to the whole of India. Shuddh hindustani types! Which is why I kinda consider hindi as my mother tongue... after all, national language hai... :)

ps: Oye, you've got me hooked on to 'Tinka tinka'! :O


#PP,
Jaani, jo log sheeshe ke gharon mein rehte hain, woh Sayesha par paththar nahin phenka karte.

#Abhi,
Hahaha! You know what? If my Dad's hindi and singing weren't so bad, mahabharat toh ho hi jata! :)

Anonymous said...

Sayesha,
What's ur mother tongue ?

Sayesha said...

#Anon,
//What's ur mother tongue ?

I just said. Hindi.

:)

Anonymous said...

mere comments ka jawaab do!

Waiting, Anon911

ps: Don't get started on 'where are your comments'. They are right below your last 'still on the perch' rant :-)

Sayesha said...

Gosh, that sounded like the song "Mere sawaalon ka jawaab do" from Maine Pyaar Kiya. What a song! :)

I have replied. But I still dun get why you insist that I have a blog subscription. I don't want to yaar. If you wanna read it, jus drop by and read it na? Why do you want me to pop up in your mail box every day? That would be annoying, man!

pingoo said...

haha !! your dad has some great pr skills :p.

Anonymous said...

Got the point alrite! Tumhara blog, tumhari marzi :-)

BTW, do check out this one: http://saltwaterblues.blogspot.com/ ... nice reading!

Unsubscribed, Anon911

Angelsera said...

whn my mom gets furious, my dad will pretend to b furious n all of a sudden crack a joke.Everytime.And even though mom knows its gonna happen,sometimes she will jus burst out laughing also.
Its jus so cute to watch

Saltwater Blues said...

hello Sayesha: Thanks for visiting The Blues

your profile pic is really beautiful ... Fun blog too.

cheers mate!

ankur said...

Oh! at first i thought your mom got angry cause she treated the pepsi as some sort of a bribe..!! :)

strange levels of imagination at 9 in the morning...

anyways...keep walking...u r doing good...

~a

Fao said...

morn, S! see..i chose Others. m not anon anymore! feeling empowered! m stupendous girl! hey, where are ya, virdi?

n really S...where ARE you from? your native state. no wandering-monk type answer.

hey...i had a dream abt. ya!!! you n i were frens...n you kept shooting a needle at me thro a pea shooter!!! you pygmy bandar! n i shot one rite back at ya...think it was some kinda tag game. v were cackling like hi-school girls! bah!

Sayesha said...

#Pingoo,
Yeah, he's mastered his Patni Relations skills all right. And I suppose the lack of musical skills just helps. :)

#Anon911,
Thanks for understanding :)
ps: Checked out the blog.

#Angelsera,
Sometimes parents can get so hilarious, hai na? :)

#Saltwater Blues,
Thanks! :)

#Ankur,
Pepsi as bribe?? Hahahahaha! That's hilarious!! Are you running low on sleep too? :)

#Empowered Fao,
It's good to be able to differentiate you from the other anons! :)

Btw, I don't really identify with a single state as such. It's all such a mix in my head, so I find it easier to consider hindi as my mother tongue :)

ps: Needle through a pea shooter? Errr... the next time can we play a safer game in your dreams? :P

sumita said...

Very cute post! For some reason, I enjoy the ones with your parents featured the most. I guess we can relate to those situations easily :-) This friend of mine has a lovely tactic that instantly diffuses all such tension. When someone is angry and yelling at high pitch, he starts making all these kung fu sounds! He goes 'heee yaaa', haiiikuuu', 'wakkaooo' etc...and everyone forgets the problem and just bursts out laughing!

Angelsera said...

//Sometimes parents can get so hilarious, hai na? :)

oh ya def..makes me wonder who is more 'grown up'..me or them!

PuNeEt said...

hahhahaha that's so sweet...

"Sabko maloom hai main sharaabi nahin
Phir bhi koi pilaaye toh main kya karoon?"

Lolzzzz

Arz hain...

Main to peeta tha... usne chuda di apni kasam de kar...
Mehfil main baitha to dosto ne pila di uski kasam de kar


Cheers

virdi said...

sayesha dont lie... your mother tongue is Welsh... Oinglish with such an accent that a new script was started...

B.T.W i know her mother tongue. Sayesha, shall i tell??? moral of the story: never trust a Surdar with brains!!! hahahaha... Mogambo Khush hua...

ok meri amma not telling anyone. its your job to tell or not tell and not mine. My gob is shut :-|

Just for everyone's information, it is not Hindi...

V..

PS: someone loves using the HTML thing. :-)

Sayesha said...

#Hey Sumita,
Haha! Is the kung fu guy our friendly neighbourhood Virdi? :P

#Angelsera,
True. Even I feel that at times! Like I'm the grown-up intervening in a kids' fight! :P

#Puneet,
//Main to peeta tha... usne chuda di apni kasam de kar...
Mehfil main baitha to dosto ne pila di uski kasam de kar

Hahahaha! :D
ps: Ooops, was it meant in a serious way? I found it hilarious! :D

#Virdi ke bache ke baap,
Arre baba! I said that I consider Hindi as my mother tongue. 'Cos I identify with it more than I do with my actual mother tongue.

//never trust a Surdar with brains!!!
I wanna add -- never trust a surdar without brains either! Aage se forget it man, I'm not tellin' you anything! :(

//someone loves using the HTML thing.
Achha sila diya tuney mere HTML tutorials ka. Hmmphh!!

justme said...

your dad s singing just reminded me of my dad..!! i ve never ever heard him sing..!! should tempt him to once atleast..!! i wonder y he never sings..??

Sayesha said...

#Justme,
//wonder y he never sings..??

Maybe he sings like my Dad! :P
What say we arrange a jugal-bandi? Hahahaha! :D

justme said...

@sayesha
should i ask my mum abt it..?? hopefully he s sung for her just like your dad did for your mum..!! :-)

Sayesha said...

Oh do that!! :)

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

Reminds me of my dad :-)
Starts singing stuff like Chaudhvi Ka Chand Ho and hopping around. Its hilarious. Mom breaks into a lugh instantly!!

Starbreez said...

What's kudi hansi toh phansi? Sayesha, you've gotta write a story or screenplay based on your parents one day, it would be a wonderful inspiration and a great delight, yaar. :)

Anonymous said...

Y didnt you post anything today :(

Siddhu said...

Not being a teetotaller, I think I would do good to keep tat in memory for future reference.(hopefully not, though ;))

Sayesha said...

#Kroopz,
That sounds hilarious!! :D

#Starbreez,
Kudi = girl, hansi = laughed, toh = then, phansi = caught (in the net or the likes)
Basically means, if you're trying to woo the girl and you manage to make her laugh, you've got yourself a catch :)

#Anon,
Hey, I usually don't post on Friday nights... but I'll be posting over the weekend :)

#Siddhu,
If you're not a teetotaller, this won't work, man! :)

Anonymous said...

why do you prefer to go by the name of Sayesha ?

N-MAC 0x00112

Bonatellis said...

btw, the pics in the previous post are cool ...

Fao san said...

konnichiwa, sayesha.

am i speaking ur lang?

arigato!

(u just sed one shud never trust a surd...with or w/o brains! i'll take a shot in the dark..ur ma tongue isn't punjabi!)

Vinesh said...

Your language makes this hilarious, but it is really sweet in a very sweet way! Did I repeat myself there :-)

Sahil said...

Sayesha,

I had no idea what teetotaller meant. Now I do. Google zindabaad.

Tum kaha ho????

Vinesh said...

I'm blogrolling you.
It's my pleasure :-)

PuNeEt said...

;-)
dear it was nt meant in a serious way ;-)
Cheers

spamtaneous said...

hey ...whats up

Sayesha said...

#Anon,
The same reason why you prefer to go by the name of N-MAC 0x00112.

#Bonatellis,
Thanks :)

#Fao san,
//am i speaking ur lang?
Almost there, my friend :)
ps: The surd thing could be an attempt to throw pple off. ;)

#Vinesh,
Thanks :)

#Sahil,
Hum toh hamesha se yaheen hain.
Aap kahan they??

#Vinesh,
Honoured :)

#Puneet,
Phew! :D

#Spammy,
// hey ...whats up

My spirits. Find out in the next post :)

Aj said...

Hahaha
Great post sayesh
will keep haunting here :P

btw: u dint reply to my comments in ur last post :(

Sayesha said...

Hey, I did! At 4 in the morning! :P

Neel Arurkar said...

Hehe! That was funny.

Sayesha said...

#Neel,
Yeah, it was. Parents can be so funny at times! :D

Siddhu said...

Damn!! :-(

Sahil said...

>Aap kahan they??

Hum duniya ke meyle mein kahin kho gaye the. Kaam-shaam mein itne busy ho gaye ke yeh sabh blog posts hi nahin padh paaya ache se.

Ur dad sounds like a really funny guy. Somehow the scene that came to mind, was Urmila's dad in Rangeela. It was one of the first scenes - ur dad anything like that?