Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Damn 'that girl'

Last week at work, trainers from our printer came down to our office to give us a briefing on Computer-To-Plate (a book printing technology) and DeskTop Publishing. The title of the briefing was ‘CTP and DTP’. (When I first heard it, it sounded like a really bad movie to me. 'CTP and DTP'. ‘Dumb and Dumber’.)

The briefing was supposed to be only for the designers, but for no reason, the editors were also asked to attend it. So we editors went to the briefing room armed with our notepads and slunk into the chairs at the back, away from the eyes of the trainers. I plonked myself on a chair and hid behind my tall shaggy-haired illustrator.

The briefing began. And slide after slide, the trainer rattled off jargon. All I heard was what sounded like “During preflight packaging of the files, you can use Pitstop software to generate the OPI information and link it to QXC using a LDX-enabled IIF.” making all editors (and I’m sure some designers too!) go “Huh???”

The only preflight packaging I know is the little bag of peanuts that the grumpy Air India hostess hands me before my annual flight home. And the only pitstop I know is the one in F1 races, and the more informal one -- ‘toilet break’. As for the other terms he mentioned, I lost them all.

So I decided that the best option was to switch off. When I looked around, all the others (including many of the designers!) had switched off too. I noticed that everybody had the same thing jotted down on our notepads. ‘CTP and DTP’. And that’s it. Nothing more after that.

“Any questions?” concluded the trainer, after what seemed like eternity.

“Phew! Now we can go back to our desks!” I thought.

Not so fast, Sayesha!

There she was. That girl in the first row, raising her hand.

“Yes?” Said the trainer.

“Well, I have a question.” She said.

I forget her exact question, but I think it was on the lines of “When I use a OMX to save a RFW, I face a TGY error, possibly because of a PKI defect. How can I address the problem?”


The trainer looked thrilled with the question, while the rest of us gaped at each other. And we had to sit through the torture as the conversation between the delighted trainer and that girl lasted a full 15 minutes! How annoying.

And suddenly I was reminded of that girl in school. That girl. The one who used to always sit in the front row, and do her homework every single day (and even help others with their homework. Geez!), and know the answers to all the questions the teacher asked. The ultra-enthusiastic teacher’s pet kind of girl, whose answer papers were circulated in the class for everyone to see how ‘an ideal answer paper should look like’, the one who took part in every ECA the school had to offer, who would always raise her hand in every class of every subject to ask the right questions and give the right answers, and often the teacher would say, “Hold on, my dear. I know you know the answer, but I will come back to you if no one can answer, okay?” annoying the hell out of everyone else. Didn’t we all have one of those in school? Oh, how we disliked ‘that girl’, didn't we?

Ok, did I just say all that??

Hey, I was 'that girl' in my school!



37 comments:

Anonymous said...

its amazing how u manage to make these small everyday nothings sound so funny .. yet so real.. and yep, have been 'that girl' in school too.. :D

virdi said...

ahhhh shit!!! i am second again.. damn the anonymous charatcters... ufff!!

sayesha u were 1st bencher?? me too, me too... but in movies like Coolie No. 1, Awara, Dulara, Anari No. 1, Hero No. 1, And Govinda No. 1.

but i hate govinda these days... bloody no movies with David Dhavan..

V..

priya said...

never in my life been a first bencher.. i considered it insulting ;) hehehe
me big dada !! cant help it.. plus if i sit in the first row,the girl behind me says "i cant see the board!! she's too tall!! " :)

@virdi - ur typical first becher material !! written all over ur face! :D

..p..

Sayesha said...

#Anonymous,
//have been 'that girl' in school too
Join the club, girl! :P

#Virdi,
Oye, don't you dare say anything to my non-MACs!
ps: I can't stand Govinda! :O

#Priya,
Yeah man, these days it's so 'uncool' to be a first bencher, huh? :P

virdi said...

i forgot to include Raja Babu and Bade Miyan Chote Miyan.. :-)

and i can't stand him anymore... he has all flab not muscles chest...

V..

Keshav said...

Oh yea..this new post is cool :)...I wasn't "that girl" but yea sometimes I was "that boy" :p..my teacher made me sit in between 2 girls when I was in ninth standard lol..we used to fight all the time.. as in ..both the girls used to say ..keep ur bag in between us so that we don't touch each
other ..now I had only one bag :|. What to do ?? I never used to keep the bag (if I did it was only for a few min until the other prodded me) between me and the *hot* girl. Both are cool girls though :p

patiala pataka said...

I hate that girl...she got me in alot of trouble.

!xobile said...

there exists a boy like 'that girl' in our batch..

He is called mayank behl.
No what which class, he sits on the front bench, listens and asks questions, stupid as stupid can be...
And as soon as the class is about to end, he has Q's to ask

So the other day I held his collar kindly and told him if he has doubts in the last 5 mins, hold it for the next class dude.. or else...

This has solved the problem, to a small extent, i should say....

I usually write sense.. but sorry for the long type comment... :)

justme said...

hhaaha :) dat sounded just like me..!! newayz nice to c d happy sayesha back after d strong worded sayesha yest!!

virdi said...

the comment has been removed by the author sayesha gets the commenst in her gmail.. she will still reply to it... hahahaha...
sayesha>> ok come slap me.. come come..
V..

spamtaneous said...

//both the girls used to say ..keep ur bag in between us so that we don't touch each
other ..now I had only one bag :|.

ROTFLAMO..

Anonymous said...

// sayesha
Oye, don't you dare say anything to my non-MACs!

and so, sayesha to the rescue of the 'non-MAC's .. :)

Shuuro said...

Today at the end of our class everyone felt the same way as you did(desperate to leave), not because it was too technical but person who asked the question wants to know something too basic(repeating same question again and again, only by rephrasing it) and he wont let professor to go unless he satisfied this person and professor wont relieve class until he is done.

Well, in my school days i tried my best to occupy front row but i wasn't punctual, i tried for 10 long years but couldn't make it :)

The Village Idiot / Soldier said...

In the B-School world, we call such people "Gunners".....

People (who typically sit in the last row) who give that disgusted look to the gunner for asking such a question - are called "Snipers".

spamtaneous said...

ahh...i used to hate all those biaches in my school....

i also had another reason to hate them... they all were taller than me and used to stand behind me in the assembly line.. :((

Ash said...

Hehe, so was I ! :P

Angelsera said...

I always got into trouble because of "that girl"...I was never "that girl"..
I never finished homework, never paid attention in class,always caught reading novels in class

My teachers gave up on me ever passing..I guess I managed to surprise them once in a while by doing decently well.. :)

Sayesha said...

#Virdi,
Yikes man... you used to look at Govinda's chest??

#Keshav,
:)

#PP,
I used to belong to that clan... hope you don't hate me man... I used to help your clan with homework yaar!

#RCGM,
Errr... perhaps you shouldn't have mentioned his name on the blog... bechara... will post my blog rules soon! :)
ps: Btw, love the "kindly holding collar" concept... think I've done that in school too :P

#Justme,
Heyyy!! What makes you think strong-worded Sayesha ain't a happy Sayesha? :)

#Virdi,
*Virtual SLAP!*
Virdi falls on the floor. Weird hair Anil claps his hands in glee.

#Spam,
Not to mention that one of them was *hot*... hahaha! (oh how I wish this was in primary school!) Keshav, you're funny! :)

#Anon,
I'll always fight for my non-MACs. Just like my non-MACs fight for me.

#Shuuro,
It's frustrating, isn't it?
Thankfully, I can't remember asking questions after the bell rang, so I guess fewer people hated me. :P

#Hey Soldier,
Where did ya disappear, man? BS studies going good? ;)
Oh, are you a gunner or a sniper?

#Spam,
Sayesha freaks out.
Heyyy... did we go to school together? :O

#Ash,
You too, eh? :P

#Angelsera,
Don't hate me! You're still sending me the surprise gift, aren't you? :D

The Village Idiot / Soldier said...

I am neither. :) I sent you an email.

Drops Of Jupiter said...

How about this? I did all that stupid acad and ECA stuff but I was the most indisciplined girl in class! The principal called me to the office and said "What do you want to be remembered for? Your outstanding performance or that you get thrown out of the class everyday?" I was forcefully relocated to first bench:P

Jagan said...

how does it feel to taste your own medicine ? ;-) .I always had grudge against such "that girl/boy" .But looks like you have been cured of it .So no grudge gainst you .

@priya - "considered it as insult" .me too...same pinch .Mes more confident about our group now !!!

Angelsera said...

hahaha...gift??did I say gift?...hmm u realy have to wait and see now dont you...

Sayesha said...

#Village Idiot,
Got it. I need to think before I can reply. Will talk to you over the phone this weekend.

#DOJ,
Hahaha! Yeah, I was thrown out class once, and it was so humiliating to be the 'outstanding' head girl. Literally. :O

#Jag,
Yep yep, got it. Taste of my own medicine. Very unpleasant.

#Angelsera,
The greatest sin is to give someone hope and then take it back! ;)

justme said...

okies.. u got it in d wrong sense.. i meant it was nice to c d sayesha with those happy sweet posts back..!! :)

oxymoron said...

its like deja vu! i once had a training about some financial products! in a grp of 25 ppl only, one person could connect to the topic. after 90 min of torture, just when it was about to get over, that one 'damned' soul asked a question and hell broke loose! another 30 min of torture, as the trainer explained the answer... oh dear Lord! y cant such 'damned' souls wait for everyone to leave! i totally sympathise with u sayesha!

PuNeEt said...

Hey Good1...

It's so pathetic to sit in a conference/discussion, wen everything is going above the head...
the most interesting part during such conferences are the lunch break and tea break ;-)
hahahhaha

I was never "that boy" in my school...
;-)

Cheers

Ravi said...

Gosh. I cant believe you were once the topper teacher's pet types. You must be having a lot of friends eager to get your notes. If I'd met you then, I would never have even tried coming close to you.

Sayesha said...

#Justme,
Chill yaar. I was jus kidding :)

#O-moron,
Thanks man :)

#Puneet,
I agree! Sometimes, we have full day courses, and the only things that gets us thru the torture are the thought of the tea breaks and the lunch breaks! :P

#Ravi,
Yes, I was. And for some reason, after writing this post, am not so proud of it anymore! :P

//If I'd met you then, I would never have even tried coming close to you.
You mean you would now?? Haha!

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

LOL, uh oh!!!
I was that girl until college. Then I moved to the back row and cursed people sitting in front answering the questions!!

Sayesha said...

#Kroopz babe,
Me too! I stopped studying the minute I entered uni. And cursed all the first bencher "nerds" for my entire 4 years in uni! :P

Starbreez said...

A-ha! I knew you were talking about yourself, hehehe! By the way, do I know who 'that grr' is? And for a moment there, I thought you were going to wax lyrical about my beloved Mac(intosh) computers!

Sayesha said...

Hey Starbreez!
'That grrr' was not from our division (thank God!).
ps: Mac(intosh) computers rock. :)

Ravi said...

//You mean you would now?? Haha!
Somethings are better left unsaid :)

Sayesha said...

#Ravi,
Oye! Sayesha se jitni door raho, aapki sehat ke liye utna hi achha hai :)

Ravi said...

//Oye! Sayesha se jitni door raho, aapki sehat ke liye utna hi achha hai :)

Why? Because You will give me the "feel good" infection?
Sorry. You're late. You have already infected me. :)

Sayesha said...

#Ravi,
Oops! :P

Bhavya said...

Sounds like an episode out of my own life :D
I always switch off during presentations in my office! But I've also been "that girl" in my school!