Thursday, September 15, 2005

Gimme a single reason!

My ideal relationship status?

Attached yet single.

Sounds like an impossible concept? Well, hear me out first.

The world is full of people looking yearningly at the other side.
Single people yearn to be attached. Attached people think singlehood rocks. But is there a middle path? Sounds too good to be true? But I believe there is.

There is a certain way I live my life. I like to live it that way, and a guy is not a good enough reason for me to change it. If the guy thinks I'm worth it, he's got to understand that.

And that to me, is singlehood.

I know this girl who's a lot like me. Guards her independence with absolute ferocity. She thought she depended on no one. Till the day she suddenly found that she did. She needed help with some big stuff. And when her boyfriend could not help (no fault of his though, long story) she suddenly realised that maybe she wasn't so independent after all. First she got angry with him, and then at herself for being unfair to him. And for being so helpless. And she hated that feeling. Well, she did not break up with him, but 'broke away' instead.

Now she's happy as hell. Lives her own life. Meets him once in a while. Loves him a lot. But she's as 'single' as can be. And deliriously happy.

And that's my kinda singlehood.


To be known as me and not someone's somebody. To not have to answer to anyone or to ask for permission for anything. Or to explain what I'm doing with my life or whom I'm meeting and where I'm going. That makes me feel like a million bucks.

And that to me, is singlehood.

I had a list of things in my head that define what I expect from this state of 'attached singlehood'. And finally, the list is ready for public viewing.

Here it is, boy:

  • I think the whole Valentine's Day concept kinda sucks. I may not buy you anything or expect you to buy me anything. So don't panic.
  • If I point at a girl on the road and say, "Hey, that's one hot babe!" don't assume that I'm testing you and look away. Check her out for heaven's sake. And no, you don't have to say "But you're hotter!" to me. Duh, if I'm pointing her out, she's obviously hotter than me. Otherwise I'd be pointing at myself.
  • I'll point out hot guys on the road too. You have the option of not looking.
  • If you wanna hang out with the boys on Friday night, do so. Don't come and "ask me for permission". It's okay, really. (As long as you keep that beer belly under control.)
  • If we have a fight and I get angry, don't manaofy me just because I am the girl. If I think over it, and figure that it was my fault, I'll come manaofy you.
  • I will spend 50% of my income on stuff that you will not ask me about. Although you may see most of it in the shoe racks, but once in a while I may be saving up to buy you something big. So rule of thumb -- don't ask.
  • I want a beach holiday every year. I'd like you to come with me, but if you can't for some reason, don't stop me from going.
  • Give you my email password?? Are you freakin' crazy? Have I ever asked you for yours?
  • You don't have to pay every time we eat out. I prefer to go dutch. (But feel free to pamper me with a little kit kat now and then.)

  • Don’t give me bouquets when we’re out. I think it's extremely silly to walk around with a guy, holding a bouquet.
  • Do not buy me freakin’ expensive gifts. I’d be more than happy to just have a 2-dollar pair of earrings.
  • I am a big girl and I can take care of myself. Don’t baby me all the time. (Once in a while wouldn’t hurt though.)
  • I refuse to wear a pendant with a photo of us together. Don’t even think about it.
  • I will not open letters addressed to you. And you won't open mine.

  • I will not take you shoe-shopping. You will not take me to a gaming shop. We will only shop together if we’re buying stuff for each other, and want the other person to pick the stuff himself/herself.
  • I will do crazy things like not open an umbrella in torrential rain, play with a stranger’s baby in the train, buy a bottle of 100plus at twice the price from the old man’s shop downstairs just because he looks really bored, go to a 24-hour coffee shop at 4 in the morning and eat street food, wake up one fine day and go get a tattoo. If you disapprove, stay away.
  • I don’t watch war movies. If you want to go for one, just go by yourself. I know you really want to watch it. Don’t cancel just because I don’t want to go.
  • I’ll be happy if you open doors for me, but I won’t be angry if you don’t.
  • I will open doors for you.
  • When we're eating out, do not dig into my food as soon as it arrives. I don't like others taking the first bite of my food. And that holds for you too. You can have a sip of my drink, but that's it. One sip. If you like it so much, get your own!
  • It's okay if you forget our anniversary. But you dare forget my birthday.
  • I will continue to buy pink gerberas for myself. Please don't take it as a hint or an insult.

  • If you wanna shave your head to support the cancer society, go ahead and do it by all means. Don't ask me if you should. It's your head, man. (Jus don't be seen in public with me till your hair grows back.)
  • I will tell you which of your shirts I hate, and I will threaten to burn them. But I won't actually do it. They are your shirts. You burn them yourself.

  • On some days, I am gonna be all girl. I'm gonna get a manicure and pedicure, and probably even put on a hideous facial mask and walk around. If you can't take it, just leave. I won't mind. Really.
  • You can tell me if I get fat. It's okay, I won't shut myself in and cry. (I need someone to tell me such things so I can work out like mad.)
  • I don't want romantic candlelight dinner dates all the time. Sometimes I want to go on roller-blading, hiking, ice-skating, canoing, cycling dates. If you have no time or inclination, it's okay. I'll go with my other friends. Or on my own.

  • I have a wild side. Don't curb it. (I promise to behave when your parents are around.)
  • Understand that you're not the only person I love. I love a lot of people. I just love you in a different way.
  • I will never change my surname. Ever.
  • Ask me to marry you if and only if you're very very sure that you can handle my 'singlehood'.
Because I intend to stay single all my life.

And a boyfriend/husband will never get in the way of my singlehood.



81 comments:

virdi said...

me first.. now let me read the bloody blof with lots of Ifs...

justme said...

u know wat sayesha.. u ve jus proved one thing to me.. u r an out and out gal yaar... hheheh :)

// Don't baby me all the time (once in a while wouldn hurt though)

this is a typical gal.. hehehe :)

chal.. if u do find somebody who meets all these criterias..i would know dat there is somebody better than me in this world :)

and hey..actually somethings made sense..lot of sense too..!! but to comment on all dat would be one big a comment in itself.. so i better stop..

virdi said...

hehehe.. this girl is mad...
:-)
V..

viv said...

If only every girl gave guys a list like this, the world would be a much nicer place.

// I will spend 50% of my income on stuff that you will not ask me about

What's with 50%?

// If you wanna shave your head to support the cancer society, go ahead and do it by all means. Don't ask me if you should. It's your head, man. (Jus don't be seen in public with me till your hair grows back.)

Dilemma alert! (it's often the stuff in brackets that sows the seeds of doubt)

Good concept.

Vijay Ramamurthi said...

Two words, you rock!!
another 3 words I'm ur fan :)

Anonymous said...

Its perfectly justified:-) of cors! relationship does mean giving and taking that occasional space. It does not mean that we love someone less, but it means that we love to that extent that we respect each other's individuality:)--raysofsun

Sahil said...

Hey Sayesha,

Just wanted to say that I'm not around your blog for a few days, and won't be for another few days. Haven't read any of your blog posts, or your comments recently - coz of lack of means and time. But promise to do so when I get back to my computer. Till then just know u and ur blog are missed by someone.

...and i know u were missing me too, right?

:)

pingoo said...

List tho acha khasa bana diya :)
what about cooking ?? you don't like kitchen help..so will u cook all the food with no help at all ??..anything about the babies ?? how many kids u want and all that ? who will change the diaper when the baby cries in the middle of the night..take turns kya ? lol .. who can name the baby ? half you and half him kya ? like ..he says...my daughter is going to be my shadow after I grow old...she will take care of me..she will be my "saaya"...you will say..when I grow old..she will be my only hope...my only "asha"...what do u call her then ? sayesha ?? :O

I have a wild side. Don't curb it.

No taming and all kya ?? zoo ko once in a while jaana padega shayad ;) ..just kidding.

I will not open letters addressed to you. And you won't open mine


Thank god..u have some serious sense :)...u know europe main jab speeding karte tho high speed cameras gaadi ka photo leke ghar ko send karte.... as a proof that you were speeding... along with a speeding ticket. Mostly ghar ki aurat open's her husbands mail and what she sees..."aji sunte ho" ke baaju main ek hot si mem baiti hai..kissing and nibbling his ears prolly..next thing is divorce...so now a days they stopped sending the pics until requested ..I think (kahin pada tha)..divorce rate bahut ho gaya tha it seems...unko tho bas bahana chahiye for divorce.

It's okay if you forget our anniversary. But you dare forget my birthday.


budday bhool gaya tho khud ka budday manane ke liye zinda nahi chodoge kya :p..the bhai that you are !!

I will never change my surname

even I cannot change my sir's name !! :p

I am not even going to try and answer others..too long !! lol.

Anonymous said...

wait till you get married. You'll know what it is then

naari said...

You can be married yet single. It's fun! It's true! It makes the relationship really special because you respect each other's values. You are dependent yet very independent.

The idea is to let people know you as "you" rather than as how you perceive they would like to see you. You save yourself the trouble of maintaining multiple images and also of living with the guilt of having let people down!

Singlehood is something all of us should conserve through life because I do not believe that a single event or any one incident can wipe clear what you have been for the past so many years

lazy leo said...

Hi sayesha,

agree with every word u said. being in a relationship doesn't mean you should give up your identity or your privacy. two people don't have to do everything together - you're entitled to your own time and space once in a while. in fact its healthier for a relationship if both partners have some 'outside' friends and interests that they can occupy themselves with from time to time...... it could be a mutual understanding - i would rather inform (as opposed to take permission for) my man of my plans for a girls' night out ...(and suggest he go out on that long postponed stag party p'haps?)

i believe absolutely in the sanctity of personal mail (i think its obnoxious to read others' letters without permission - no matter how close they may be to you, and how interesting those letters may actually be!). so guys, even if you get a pink scented envelope with feminine handwriting, i won't open it (though i may grill you later if you don't volunteer information!)

its also ludicrous to think that you can't spend your own hard-earned money without having to account for every penny .... yes, of course you need to share and contribute for family expenses - 50% sounds very reasonable doesn't it..(for whoever was wondering about the figure 50% - go brush up your basic maths)

ahh...changing surnames..... i wonder why guys get a kick out of labelling a woman as their own .... i don't ask a guy to display his married status either by his title, his name or dress.... (though it wouldn't be a bad idea really in some cases ... wayward husbands posing as bachelors ..etc etc..)..so why should you expect me to? my professional success is a result of the upbringing and effort put in by myself and my parents and i would like my identity, my name to reflect that.... on a slightly different track, there's been some debate about whether kids should bear their mother's surname as well as their fathers....... i'm not that much of a feminist to advocate that...(imagine burdening a child with ten surnames to reflect the last few generations of ancestors!) so, much as i would like it, i do not think it's practical to let my child take on two surnames...however surely i'm entitled to keep my own?? i will not be less of a wife or a mother if I keep my maiden name, will I?

oh well... i guess some guys will dismiss this as 'feminine rants'... to them i will only say - maybe you're not man enough to let a woman be herself....

spamtaneous said...

very noble thoughts indeed.. :- .. lets see how long u can stand by this :)

//Ask me to marry you if and only if you're very very sure that you can handle my 'singlehood'.

Will u marry me..!



jus kiddin

raven said...

I will do crazy things like not open an umbrella in torrential rain, play with a stranger’s baby in the train, buy a bottle of 100plus at twice the price from the old man’s shop downstairs just because he looks really bored, go to a 24-hour coffee shop at 4 in the morning and eat street food, wake up one fine day and go get a tattoo. If you disapprove, stay away.

I don't want romantic candlelight dinner dates all the time. Sometimes I want to go on roller-blading, hiking, ice-skating, canoing, cycling dates. If you have no time or inclination, it's okay. I'll go with my other friends. Or on my own.

I have a wild side. Don't curb it. (I promise to behave when your parents are around.)

Understand that you're not the only person I love. I love a lot of people. I just love you in a different way.

I will open doors for you.

It's okay if you forget our anniversary. But you dare forget my birthday.

I will not open letters addressed to you. And you won't open mine.

~please word verification hata de :((

Sushant Bhatia said...

This reads like the comedy skit of Conan O'Brian's "In the year 2000....". Definately one of your best posts. :-)

Sayesha said...

#Virdi,
You're a kid! Commented even before reading the post just so you could be first? Haha! :D

#Justme,
That's just Sayesha. Quoting from the song in Salaam Namaste 'My dil goes hmmm...'
Thodi alag si hai
Thodi galat si hai


#Virdi,
Look who's talking.

#Viv,
Just ask your girl for the list, man. I'm sure she'll have one.
ps: 50% because I assume the other 50% will go into household expenses if I move in with the guy or get married... you know... stuff like rent, bills, raw materials for pav bhaji, etc. ;)
ps: The stuff in the brackets is my safety net! ;)

#Vijay,
Thanks, man! :)

#Raysofsun,
I agree. No relationship is worth it if it takes away your individuality.

#Sahil,
I'd like to say "You wish, dude!" in typical I-don't-care Sayesha style, but subah subah jhooth bolna achhi baat nahin hai.
ps: Well, I didn't miss you, but my blog did. A li'l bit.

#Pingoo!
This is not a how-to-divide-household-duties-after-we-get-married-and-have-kids!! This is a how-to-be-attached-and-yet-single list. Don't you freak me out with the baby talk!

#Anonymous,
Ooh, someone sounds bitter.

#Naari,
I hope you're living the kinda life I'm talkin' about! All the best, girl! :)

#Lazy Leo,
Well said. Sometimes the men don't get it. ;)

#Spam,
//Will you marry me..!

No.

Reasons:
1. There was no question mark in your "question". Are you asking me or telling me?
2. You don't sound like a guy who can handle my singlehood. :)
3. I don't know you!! :D

#Raven,
I can't yaar! The spam's too much! :(

#Sushant,
Thanks! :)

virdi said...

sahil>> like alex the lion from Madagascar... no, no-no, no, no-no, no, no-no, no... we are not missing you...

sayesha>> i am not kid!!! hmmmph!!!

yes i am talking, and you are mad... u gave such a huge list... arre yeh bhi koi bat hui kya?? ladka pasand kar rahi hai ya army ke liye soldier?? please be single yaar... arre ladke log is ke chakkar mein mat pado bhai... aai shapat, pehle bhi kitni baar bola hai... ;-)

my word for verification was: gyoqvxno, i m going to write this everytime... i find it funny... :-)

V..

abhi said...

bhaiyya aisa hai ki after one of my recent posts , one of the girls commented that it would be atleast a DECADE before I find a girl I want.

And reading this post , only one word comes to my mind - CENTURY.;)

ashwin said...

awesome list.
great post.

let me know if you find a girl that adheres to such a specification. :)

Sayesha said...

#Virdi,
//ladka pasand kar rahi hai ya army ke liye soldier??

Everything is fair in love and war. And war needs a soldier :)

#Abhi,
Tujhe lagta hai it'll take a century to find a guy who'd agree to and respect my list? How wrong you are my friend... ;)

#Ashwin,
//let me know if you find a girl that adheres to such a specification.

Oye! You mean 'guy' don't you? I'm the girl here, dude. And a straight one at that.

Nutty said...

Hi sayesha, been a silent spectator of your blog for past few weeks. Great post.

This list was an eye opener. It means so much can actually be expected from a guy. Damn!!

Casablanca said...

Sorry, I disagree.

U make "attached-hood" seem really horrible.. where the guy is a slavedriver and a control freak. Not sure what kind of relationships you are referring to, but I think your "singlehood" concepts are more or less part and parcel of most modern relationships.

Ooops.. are we allowed to disagree with u on your blog? ;)

Sayesha said...

#Nutty,
My post does not only list my expectations of my guy. It also lists things I am willing to do to make his life less painful. I think it's a fair balance.

#Casablanca,
//Ooops.. are we allowed to disagree with u on your blog?

By all means, my dear. By all means.

But you know what? I find it strange is that you would want to "disagree" with a list that I made for my life. You can't do that. It's my list.

I never said that attached-hood is "horrible". I said that it doesn't work for me if it curbs my individuality. And I've seen the crushing-of-individuality happening in a lot of your so-called "modern relationships". And I just wouldn't allow that in my life.

Ravi said...

Hey anyone would be lucky to have a person like you as his girlfriend. I definitely want someone like that to let me be & enjoy her own singlehood too.

But I think I'm still not mature enough to completely understand the meaning of attachment. esp. after seeing Salaam Namaste where the couple try in vain to practice singlehood.

I think Ashwin was trying to say that he was looking for a girl for himself.

#Casablanca
You are saying that what Sayesha is describing is more like modern "attached-hood". You are opposed to her naming those things as "singlehood". Fine. Name it as you like. It doesn't matter. Its only a small technicality. A difference of Nomenclature. You believe its "attached-hood". Sayesha believes its her kind of "singlehood". Let it be.

Anil said...

Since no one else is in the queue... Sayesha, will you marry me!!!!

*kick in the groin*
*ouch*

SplitPersonality said...

I think you are deciding on marriage very soon.. It happens to all single, Don't know whom to talk kinda environment...
Abt singlehood.. Njoy it in dreams.. It's girls who start killing singlehood after marriage.. Guys don't like to answer any thing or question unnecessarily…
But I bet U’ll get bored / feel not attached / feel really don’t have any one with u..

OR YOU Will have some pets..

Sayesha said...

#Ravi,
Thanks.
*blush* :)
ps: I know what you mean. Salaam Namaste made me think too.

//I think Ashwin was trying to say that he was looking for a girl for himself.

#Ashwin,
Oh, was that what you meant? Sorry, can't say "Main hoon na!" :P

#Ravi,
Thanks for further clarifying my point about the terminology. Couldn't have done it better myself. :)

#Anil,
Ok what's wrong with the guys of the world?? Where is the question mark after the question?????? Sayesha won't even consider a guy who does not know his punctuation. ;)

#Splitpersonality,
Oooh another bitter one, are we? :)

oxymoron said...

if only, more members from the fairer sex could think like this!
if i haven't said it b4, u rock sayesha!

ashwin said...

*sigh* I tried. :)

Anish said...

girl...u r getting good at this blogging stuff :-)

Sayesha said...

#Oxymoron,
Hey thanks! :)

#Ashwin,
// *sigh* I tried. :)

And good effort, I must say :)

#Anish,
// girl...u r getting good at this blogging stuff :-)

Thanks man. The snake bites hardest just before it dies, eh? ;)

Drops Of Jupiter said...

Qn- did your boyfriend really shave his head for the cancer society..don't you think that's noble? Why would you be ashamed of being seen with a guy like that...you should be showing him off!

Sayesha said...

#DOJ,
Hahaha! No, girl! It's just a warning.

And to answer your question, well, in India shaving your head has a certain meaning (which I'm sure you're aware of). A guy may want to support the cancer society by shaving his head, but I don't support playing around with religious and cultural rites. Even though I do not support the rite itself.

viv said...

// in India shaving your head has a certain meaning

Actually, that's grey area. In south india, people consider getting their head shaved a good thing (religiously speaking). Like tens of thousands of people do everyday at Tirupathi.

I guess you owe it more to yourself than anybody else to explain why you do certain things. It's upto ppl to decide whether they believe in 'your' reasons or not.

And I guess that's precisely the sort of freedom you describe. Nothing wrong there.

Word Verification: oisxu
oisxe would have sounded funny...

Ranj said...

sayesha: Been reading your blog for sometime now, but this one - I had to comment! If I were to ever sit down to write a list, I think it would be the same - word to word. What patience :)

With your permission - may I share this with "people" ?! :-)

penandpaper said...

I loved this post but I only wish I could be so independent!That is just not me!But I loved your post anyways!!!

Sayesha said...

#Viv,
I agree. That's why I said if he wants to shave his head, he's free to do so. But because I do not believe in it, I will not support it.

#Ranj,
Yes, you may share the link with "people". :) Just know your responsibility as a blog reader when you decide whom you're forwarding it to. I've placed my blog URL in your safe hands, blog reader. Hope you take good care of it.
ps: I could have asked you to copy-paste the list and send it to the "people" but old habits die hard. I'm an editor. Very particular about copyright. :P

Sayesha said...

#Penandpaper,
Thanks! :)
Confession -- I wasn't like this coupla years ago. I guess you never know who you are till you do. One day it will just hit you -- who the real 'you' is. :)

Sakshi said...

Join the club of 'Queens of wishful thinking'.

Damn good post....

Anonymous said...

I am a guy who lost on one such girl. not because she wanted to be single. but because neither of us could handle what our parents put us through. The time we were together we were very much single. Trust me as much as a gal wants to be single, so does a guy. We respected each other's privacy immensly. And now I am engaged to someone my parents deemed fit. I have learnt from my past relationship and I will let her space be, but I am too sceptical about mine.
Am I regretting... may be I am maybe I am not... I dont know... but I know I have been ok with situations where I cant forsee properly. And I hope she does too !
Sorry for ranting publicly, but this just reminds me a lot of the past.

Anil said...

>>Where is the question mark after the question??????

I've never asked any girl to marry me and have my kids the way Virdi does (so often), but if I were to do that, there would be no question mark after the line. It would just be a statement.

Waah waah, kya dialogue maara hai.. je hui na mardon waali baat!

Sayesha said...

#Sakshi,
Wishful thinking?? No way, girl. Mine's a real case. I've done my homework. It's possible.

#Anonymous,
Your comment is too cryptic for me to understand exactly what happened, but I hope you can be happy with whatever you've decided about your life. A lot of times, the "what if I'd been with her" causes a lot of hurt, and although it's not an easy feeling to control, I hope your fiancee understands (if she knows)...

Sayesha said...

#Oh Weird Hair Suitor,
If it wasn't a question, what was the "Will you" doing there?

Bolna chahiye tha, "Sayesha. Marry me." Woh hoti mardon wali baat! (Now you've lost your chance man.)

Anil said...

Mere WH ki kasam, I like this list so much that I'm gonna make this a checklist to gauge all my future girlfriends against.

patiala pataka said...

Sayesha, if you are serious you sound awfully cold. Bechara husband shaadi ke mandap se bhag jayega!

Sayesha said...

#WH Anil,
Hahahaha! Aisa mat karna baba, they're gonna chase me down the street, man!

#PP,
Kya karein? Hum toh aise hi hain. Koi dilwala hi hoga jo dulhaniya le jayega. :)

virdi said...

koi dilwala hi hoga??? nahi meri amma, koi pakka idiot hi hoga... ;-)

like Anil Chappa

V..

ahaan said...

"I refuse to wear a pendant with a photo of us together. Don’t even think about it."
Hey, tell me do people still do that ...... :)

"I'll point out hot guys on the road too. You have the option of not looking."
Thats tough .... :))

rest ,best of luck for u finding a guy with all such traits .....
Man, i never knew girls have such a does and donts for guys ....

spamtaneous said...

//Ok what's wrong with the guys of the world?? Where is the question mark after the question??????

hey sayesha..thats not a question .. thats a proposition..

jisko bhi sayesha ko LIVE propose karna hai...go with a question mark face..like this :?: ...:)

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

I am a big suck for the mushy stuff. Well not big bouquets and stuff but things like chocolates, opening doors, watching out and all that.
But then thats just me.
Hmm I would like my independance too even if I were 'attached'; lets see how that goes!!!

the_free_soul said...

in tht case u shuld just reamin single coz the guy marryin u may like to loose his singlehood at sum pt of time coz he is in a relnshp, whch cant happen under ur rules.

Anonymous said...

Though, the post is in a very light tone with loads of humor, Its very essential to lay out the rules and expectations upfront when entering a relationship.. can save some hardship in the future..

that said every relationship has some give and take.. and sadly for women its more give than take (usually)

Sayesha said...

#Virdi,
Tu nahin samjhega. Teri umar ke baahar ki baat hai. :)

#Ahaan,
//Hey, tell me do people still do that ...... :)

Oh yes, they do. Tacky to me, romantic to them I suppose.

//"I'll point out hot guys on the road too. You have the option of not looking."
Thats tough .... :))

So it means you wanna check out hot guys on the road. Go ahead by all mean! :D

#Spam,
//hey sayesha..thats not a question .. thats a proposition..

Still not phrased right, Spammy. ;)

//jisko bhi sayesha ko LIVE propose karna hai...go with a question mark face..like this :?

Oh yeah? You givin' tutorials to potential candidates now? :)

#Kroopz,
Every girl wants a bit of attention now and then. I am no exception. But arm in arm with a guy on the road, carrying a bouquet?? That's too tacky for my taste! :)

#The_free_soul,
Well, that's why the list is such a tough one. There's only one guy for me, and he understands me and the list fully.

#Anonymous,
My take is -- some sacrifices and compromises are needed to make a relationship work, and I am prepared to do that. But I must remember not to lose myself :)

Anonymous said...

SingleHood

Confused! Can the list be summarised as giving space in the relationship ?

n BTW wat z a bottle of 100plus? Is it something like the Jitendra wala '30 Plus' ?

T C

HoliDevil

ahaan said...

sorry but checking out hot guys , is not something that i am interested in :D
But by tough i mean suppose u r spending time with ur girlfriend ofcourse u wont want her to check al the guys she finds "HOT". :)

" u have the option of not looking "
cmon u cant just turn around ur face everytime ur chick has to watch some stud...

virdi said...

i am not 12!!!!

blood is boiling with anger!!! nostrils flaring and pumping out fire!!!

just for everyone's info, Goblet of Fire releasing worldwide on 16th November...

word: hliimihq

V...

Jagan said...

initially i thought that this post was too long and I had read it later . But then I thought I had just have a glance ...and then cudnt stop reading till the end .

freak ..there r (very )few girls with this kinda attitude . I guess u got every guy's attention and also the respect :-) . happy singlehood life :-

Bonatellis said...

debatable, but very interesting thoughts nonetheless ....

Sayesha said...

#HoliDevil,
//Confused! Can the list be summarised as giving space in the relationship ?

No.

//wat z a bottle of 100plus? Is it something like the Jitendra wala '30 Plus' ?

Hahaha! No man. 100 plus is a sports drink. I love it.

#Ahaan,
//" u have the option of not looking "
cmon u cant just turn around ur face everytime ur chick has to watch some stud...

Gosh I meant you have the option of not looking at the guy and not at 'your-chick-looking-at-your-guy'! :D

ps: I like your name. Ahaan. Nice sound to it. :)

#Virdi,
Ok fine you're not 12. Khush?
Anyway, your mental age decreases with each passing day...

#Jag,
Hehe... thanks :)

#Bonatellis,
That's ok. Everyone's thoughts except our own seem debatable to us, don't they? :)

Siddhu said...

Hell, I thought I posted a comment on this yesterday. Did I or didn't I? Shit, I can't blood remember! :P - sorry, Sayesha.

Anyway, great post as usual; though the list is terribly long, I must say!!

Maybe I'll make a similar list for girls who desperately want to ask me out. ;) There are thousands...er...hundreds...er...ten or so...er...coupla...er... I'll just write a bloody list, dammit!

patiala pataka said...

#Virdi,
Ok fine you're not 12. Khush?
Anyway, your mental age decreases with each passing day...


Arrey Sayesha he is not a bacha ok and he is mentally quite capable! Read what he says...link

Sayesha said...

#Hey Siddhu,
No man, you didn't. Perhaps you dreamt it up! :)
I'm looking forward to your list!

#PP,
I was the first one to read that! (Internal sources, hehe!)

Our Virdi saying something like "The industrial power transmission components market has experienced a better growth recently following a slow growth during early 2000's recession!" ???

Naah, must be a spokesperson.

Anonymous said...

Nice!

'attached singlehood' is a term that I am gonna (ab)use a lot ;-)

Once again, Anon911

rimjhim said...

hey sayesha,,,
totally agree with u...

infact i m lucky enough to find such a sensible guy.........

infact i think...if u set expectations right from beginning of realtionship...in some time..u can make these things understand a person..

often..a break up is a result of not setting the expectation right from beginning...!!!

Shrinking your world to a person ...is the blunder ppl often commit when they are in love!!

HimS said...

How I wish all girls were so... single?

Sayesha said...

#Anon911,
Thanks! :)
ps: So you're still around eh? :)

#Rinku,
True. When a person becomes our world, the probability of our world crashing down increases. :(

#Hims,
Hey, I am sure there are more like me around. Keep a lookout! :)

Anonymous said...

Of course! I do happen to drop by as and when I remember your blog. This flip-flop would continue till you step down from your self-maintained perch of not having a subscription facility here. As you'd say, its your blog, and you get to take a call on what goes on and what not. After all, people have the choice of coming (or not) here ;-)

Somewhere around, Anon911

Sayesha said...

//till you step down from your self-maintained perch of not having a subscription facility here.

Whoa. How mean.

But Sayesha shall stay on the perch.

:)

Anonymous said...

ps: Always remember - all it takes is a little pin prick to burst a huge, inflated balloon.

PS-eque, Anon911

pps: Some of the brighter, physics-types would like to point out that if you prick near the base of the balloon, it would deflate rather than burst. But hey, we are not talking literal here, we are talking literary :-D ^_^

Anonymous said...

pps: The fact was meant to be interpreted just as a fact, a nugget of practical wisdom.

Any relation, directly or otherwise to the prevailing conditions, both on the blog & sidelines and otherwise in the world maybe entirely coincidental & inconsequential, even thought it might not appear so at the first or many subsequent inspections.

ppps: Nostradamus sez that I would rise to the top in corporate hierarchy, I know how to make jalebis out of simple statements and do the C.Y.A. act pretty well

pppps: As always, Anon911

Sayesha said...

#Anon911,
You know what? If my ego had been a huge inflated balloon, Then I would have had a subscription facility.
ps: Why are we still discussing this?

Agastya Sen said...

Came here through Pradyot's blog.

Woman, are you for real ? :)
(A very) Interesting Post

Sayesha said...

#Hey Aidoneus,
Thanks! :)

//Woman, are you for real ?

Yes. I am. :)

feelin_scared said...

seems u r my typo girl...hehe just joking!!i hv a girl here and i m mustering courage everyday just to speak to her.till now no success..may b some fear of rejection..but i bet my girl is just like u.

Sayesha said...

Feelin_scared,
Hey, did ya jus' call me a typo??? :@
ps: Hope she's like me. And hope you can speak your heart out without feelin_scared! ;)

VT said...

I would say, it will be a passé just like the phases in your previous evolving self which brought you to this stage desiring "singlehood". IMO there is no "the best way" to live life to the fullest. Things we desire and yearn for today will soon become drab once we attain and enjoy them for sometime. We always yearn for change in life. Sometimes our independence may become too droning that we would wish to be pampered and taken care of. Likewise too much of caring, control will certainly make us crave for personal space and it is only natural that we should follow our mind.

This also brings me to an interesting question - Will we ever reach a stage from where on we won't look back and say - "Oh those were the days of my idealism"?. Or my question for you Sayesha, do you think your being in such a "singlehood" relationship, that you so much desire, would be an enduring and the ultimate state of realization for you (which you will never want to change)?

Though, all in all, it was a very funny read and you really have a flair for writing. Will keep coming, thanks for this healthy dose of amusement!

Harshi said...

Sayesha. I love ur individuality. Infact, I feel the same as you do. I am a very giving, and compromising person and the softest one when in love and will always think of my partner's comfort too, BUT at the same time, I would like to maintain my identity, privacy, space and independence and would never like to lose it to anyone. Ur statement of it hitting us "who we are" was very right-on. I don't believe what you said was anything radical at all. And you don't have to give "any explanations or justifications" to people who don't get the concept. It makes complete sense to me. Way to go girl! U are an inspiration to those who feel cloistered and shadowed in relationships. And you are right, The Right Guy will Get You, as he gets to know you more. Goodluck Sayesha!

Jay said...

Interesting.

Anonymous said...

Hi Sayesha,

New to your blog. Started today. Loved this particular piece of yours !! Echoes my sentiments a lot :) !

-/Chitra

The Smiling Girl said...

THis is one post which when I read first, thought that you are exactly like me. And thats when I guessed that you would think like me in many situations!
I still follow all of these... yes.. all of these in my marriage and we are going strong..:)
And this is quite possible in marriages yaar... its fun being like this, u know!!!
Except the surname thingy.. u know that right? :)

Arun said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Arun said...

First I thought I shouldn't ask - but you can always decline. Singlehood revisited - what are your thoughts?