Monday, June 26, 2006

Are you a hot sexy guys wanting to do frand ships with honest and lovely person?

So Rohit asked me why my Orkut profile is so blank. It just has my name, my blog URL and country. Orkut wouldn't allow me to go surname-less, so I added a random S after Sayesha. Just as well, because my dear friend Lalit likes to refer to me as Sakshaat Sayesha, prefixed by a "Haila!"

Anyway, so Rohit's question brought me back to why I deleted my first Orkut profile in the first place.

I used to have an Orkut account loooong ago, but I deleted it because I was traumatised by messages that went somewhat like "I am wanting to do friendship with you. If you're also wanting to do friendship with me, email me at really_sexy_guy_I_swear_believe_me@blah_mail.com."

The messages were so wanting (if I may borrow that dude's favourite phrase) in sense that I realising that all I was "wanting to do" was delete my Orkut account. And I did.

But recently, I was forced to change my mind.

All because of that little feeling we get in the pit of our stomachs called 'jealousy'.

Jealousy in the blogworld is of three types.

1. The jealousy that arises when you see someone you don't really like commenting on the blog of one of your blog friends ("Hmmm... pandrah taarekh ko raat ke do baje woh tere blog par kya kar raha/rahi thi?")

2. The jealousy that arises when you see one of your blog friends commenting on the blog of someone you don't really like ("Hey bhagwan... ab tu uske blog par subah ke chaar baje kya kar raha/rahi tha/thi??")

3. The jealousy that arises when you see your blog friends getting close to one another without you, simply because you don't have a key to the playground where they hang out. ("Haan?? Tum sab online they?? Ek saath??")

So it was the jealousy of the third kind that made me get a new Orkut account for myself. It appeared to me that my blog friends were having way too much fun without me on Orkut, playing a particularly silly game called scrap-scrap.

And darn, I was missing out.

Secondly, I thought things would have changed now. I thought that guys of our generation are not so dumb anymore to think that girls would actually fall for the stupid lines, taken straight from the days of IM's infancy when "Hi, wanna chat?" was the supposedly the 'in thing' to say to random strangers. I thought guys would have matured over the years and come up with better lines.

But nope, I was wrong. Nothing has changed. The girls have moved on, but the net is still full of guys who are 'really hot sexy guys wanting to do frand ships with honest and lovely person'.

So I decided to compile a list of such messages that are still floating around on the net. The bad english, the typos, the 'Hai'! It's all still there.

Contributions from The girl who sold the world, Rays of sun, Smiling girl, Lalit (Nope, it's not his line. Thankfully.) and Sakshaat Sayesha herself. (And oh, many of these came from the common IFF accounts created coupla days ago.)

1. hi.. I guess I am just around those days where I dont have too many productive things to do. Anyways.. while browsing through orkut ummmm I ran into your profile...found things which I cud relate to .. if you get around to it, I would love to hear from you. Anyways, do give me a hollar and apologies if I freaked you out... cheer's
[Hollar? You want a hollar? How about I give you a dollar and you go buy yourself a pocket book on the English language?]

2. so wot r u doin dese dayz??? seemz like v'll get along well. ur prfile seemz vry intrsting.
[Oh yeah, and you got that from my profile, eh?]

3. Was just going thru your profile and found it interesting. We can get to know more, if u dont mind. Thx.
[Errr... I do mind, actually.]

4. hi iam in ______ now! nice to seee u. i would like 2 make a frnd ship. thnx
[And what do you want me to do - buy you wood and metal for your ship?]

5. iam a sensible person and a good wid heart and non voilent
[Honestly, non-voilent? So you won't beat me?? You mean angels like you exist?? I can't believe my good luck! ]

6. hi i am ____. i am looking for sex. if u r interested call me.
[Must applaud your frankness man!]

7. hai ...this ia ____...i am really interested in u...i am from ____...
["Hai"???]

8. Hi There!..are you cool, easy-going (like me!), fun & open-minded.Wow!.It's really nice to m.
[Mind completing your sentence so I see what twisted idea you have in mind?]

9. i want do frienship with u and shering u r feeling pls give u r id and contact no
my id is ______ if intrested call to me no is ______
[You wanna share me?? With whom? I am feelings? Huh, dude I'm losing you!]

10. i am sexy and free and lovely and romantic call me
[Wow, you are a dream, aren't you?]

11. I am a bit shyful person initially but after knowing each other Iam absolutely friendly. Iam very helpful and honest person.... understanding, urbane, unshakable. Iam looking for a friend who is very caring and understands my views and is honest and lovely person. I look forward for ur fine friendship.
[Shyful, are you? And unshakable at that? You may want my fine friendship, I don't want your coarse friendship.]

12. I am humble, caring person. Ome who is young at heart love to make friends and gives very much importance to life and career devlpoment. I like movies and read journals and magzines,etc.
[Young only at heart, eh?]

13. I am cool guy wants instant friendship with everyone.
[Wow, you just made me hungry... now where's that packet of instant noodles I bought yesterday?]

14. Hai,Hello,would u like to chat with me then repley to this id ok then bye take care of ur self,have a nice day
[Another "Hai"? Nope, I don't want to repley.]

15. waiting for some one made for me, ahha in this world
im sweet here herherehehrehr hahaha
[All right, what did you smoke exactly?]

16. reply for good relation
handsomeguy
[Handsomeguy?? Wow, how exciting.]

17. Wish to meet you... Interested for a fun. To enjoi.
[For a fun, huh?]

18. Searching for an Intimate Friend!!!!!!!!!!
Hi...
I'm XYZ....
I'm intrested in ur friendship....
If u r intrested in friendship...mail me back...
Regards
XYZ
XYZ
[Got your name, dude, you don't have to say it thrice!]


19. Mature and decent guy
Hi there, like to do friendship with me, I am ____/27/M staying alone and the spicy is that I am unmarried, I think you will like the flovour. If you like then give one tinkle to me or mssg me. For tinkle, _________
Buye
[Oooh, that's the spicy, is it? I'm sure I won't like the flovour. Thanks. And you read Tinkle at 27???]

20. please trust me ....ur...privacy is maintained....want to have the steam of love just lookin
[Steam of love eh?]

21. i am cute ...u love to have ...
hear u soon ...bai.
[Hey, who're you calling bai????]

22. Hi how r u ? how is life? contact me if u like to have fun, feelings and friendship. I love to have fun and make friendship. Life is short make it sweet.
[Oh, so I can only have feelings after I contact you, eh?]

23. hello this is _____ and i m looking for fun becasue life istoo short to enjoy
if u want to meet me then u can mail me i m a hot and sweet handsome guy
[Hot and sweet and handsome??? Awwwww....]

24. Hi, This is _____. Your profile has attracted my attention. I am M 35 looking for nice and sincere friendship. Would you like to try out to be friends with me. Do drop in a line.
Best Regards
[Dude, my profile has nothing! Nothing! How can it attract your attention??]

25. Looking for women to have sexy fun
Hi, a 35Year old Business Men from _____. I am good looking , smart , educated and can understand the felling of someone. I keep on travelling to Delhi,Mumbai,Banglore,Chennai,Vijaywada,Vishakapatmam,Hubli,Belgaum regularly.
[So Business Men, are you like one guy or a bunch of them?]

26. Come!!! Enjoy Life to the Fullest..... I'm open-minded,straight,fun-loving guy looking for ur friendship....
[Straight, are ya?]

27. HI AM royalboy. hi i am looking for a good friends out here......jokers pls stay away... call me at his number sio taht i can know what you mean by your oprofile and what you want as well
[Jokers pls stay away? How do you manage to stay away from yourself, dude? And oh, I don't mean anything by my profile. It's just blank.]

28. Hello All, I want some good friend. I am working MNC software company as Manager.If you are interested send mail to ______.But I want some true and good friend.I am working in software company.I want some good friend.i am free and frank who likes fun loving and decent ,and wanna enjoy life without restrictions and needs a good friend who likes me .
[Like Smiling Gal says, don't you have any true and good friend in your MNC?]

29. u seems to be interesting soulmate. Like to be yr firend, pls join me.
[An interesting soulmate, eh? Nope, dun wanna be your firend.]

30. Hi,looking for female friends Seen your profile on the net, send me a mail at _____. I will send more detial, I am from ____ on vacation.
[Not interested in your detials, enjoy your vacation!]

31. hai friend how ru ? what is ur name ? what u do? i am here to find some friend r u intersted mail me ok byee take care
[Yet another "Hai"!]

32. I am simple guy hi friend, how r u iam a software programmer working in sydney, i am very much intrested in meeting fora good fun night, want have to good friend
[So you want a good fun night or you want a good friend?]

33. u want to enjoy the real hot life then u can call me
[Oh wow, real hot life!]

34. Looking for intimate friendship This is _____, 39, good looking engineer & MBA into my own business but I believe distance hardly matters in friendship and can be reached anytime . I am an extrovert, straight, simple, jovial, understanding, well-mannered, caring, fun-loving and passionate person. I would like to have friendship with you.
[Distance can be reached anytime?? Whoa you beat Einstein hands down!]

35. A very straight forward and frank guy with a bit of sense of humour as an ingrients for fun and enjoyment in life..... A person belives in simplicity but that simplicity becomes a style of destiny.........
[A bit sense of humour only? Simplicity becomes a style of destiny???? I lost you there!]

36. Ideally looking for a gal or guy who can share joy & emotion with me.... and togher enjoy some time with fun & pleasure ... this is specifically for the guys or gals who r near to ____.
[Share emotion with you?? How???]

37. hi nice to c u here am an artiste and script writer am funloving caring person am not married not intrested,if ur int in me pls respond
[If you're not interested, why are you here????]

38. You have the beauty that myths are about.
[Jeez.]

39. Hi..beautiful..want to make friendship:D
[You gotta make it on your own then.]

40. I think you are the one I am looking for..Please call me _______!
[Oh, looking for me, are ya?]

41.
Heylo madam.. i waant to frandshib you.
[Heylo yourself. No fraandshib.]

Gals, feel free to contribute stuff you've received. :D

Guys, read and learn. What NOT to say. :D

Ever wondered why we never hear of girls sending messages like this to guys?
So if someone has an example of an exception - a girl using a moronic line on a guy, please please please share it with us.

I think we'd all wanna read it! :D




118 comments:

sunshine said...

reminds me of munnu's post "nattu ban gaya CD" and my own "ishq di galli vishh no entry".

Men. when will they grow up and grow out of these bouts of frand ships? Ahem!!!

saty said...

had a gud ha ha ha...such a long list...so seriously u must had not made it all up....:)...these intro are similar to martimonial columns...ekdum hilarious ma'am!!

Rebellion said...

BRONZE :D

Now lemme read the post :P

Anonymous said...

okay okay...we maybe stupid...but you have to admire our guts!!!atleast we try..you girls dont even do that.

Rebellion said...

LOL Sash..

That was hilarious... hehehe
Darrn, couldnt even laugh out aloud to my heart's content coz dad's around!!! But awesome stuff haan!

Height of desparation.. "im in need of friends ....so ppl and aarti add me LOL

Welcome to Orkut!!! But sure enuff, its more fun out here on your comments' space rather than Orkut.. its fulllllll of cheezy guys & crap too!!

@ Anon
Its not about guts GUY.. its cheezy & corny! Dunno what makes you guys think gals would fall in for your corny lines!!! :P

Neways, great one Sash, enjoyed it thoroughly :))

Take care,
Aarti

Nirwa said...

HAH! Orkut is full of creeps and weirdos.. !!

Some people actually use a proper picture of their own (presuming it is their own) and in their communities, they are "sexy underwear lovers of the world" and all such creeps.. half of htem are out to satisfy their perverse interests..

corniest one I get is "Will you please do friendship with me?" A friend of mine knows how I hate such corny lines, and he irritates me by asking this over and over! hahah..

Read this one.. "If I had one wish this is what it would be, I'd ask you to spend all your time with me, we'd be together forever...............wanna b my friend "

and one was "Hi Nirwa, How are you STRANGER?"

Other one, "How Friends Break up? Both Friends will think the other is busy and will not contact thinking it may b disturbing. As time passes both will think let the other contact. After that each will think why should I contact first. Here ur love will be converted to Hate. Finally without contact the memory becomes weak. They forget each other. One fine Day they will meet n blame one another. So Keep in touch with all your Friends. N Pass this to all your friends...I don't want to be one of this kind..so here i am to say u ,,,,take care keep in touch.... Regards __________"

One was.. "hii dear, wats up how r u??i m studying at _____ in mechanical engg n just looking 2 have some gud frnds 2 talk with me all time n enjoy as i do belive in frndship 4 ever so will u like 2 be my frnd dear?? "

One was.. "Am in your town, interested only in phone friend.. xxxxxxxxxx"

Another one... "hi am a straight forward guy and intrested in making friends and dating women will u b my pal................... giv ur e mail plz am a ______ from ______"

A few more too, but I guess, that's enough dose for you! :P

Orkut is freaky, now that I know you also exist over there, I'm going to write you a friendship request scrap! :P

Nirwa

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

I had posted something similar about messages on hi5. Makes you wonder how jobless these people are!!!
Here are a couple
1) I just cannot belive that ,how beautiful can be a girl , its almost unbeliveable thing

2) looking like dear and lovely. take care and mail to me if you really like to make friend. thank you Hi I didn't see Indian like you except the Arts

3) you r so pretty and beutiful and cute mybe in one day i will see u face 2 face it will be the best day in my life bye bye

Here is the link
Enjoy!!

freebird said...

The list was awesome! I've had my share of those weird stuff too. Made me dive deep into my mailxbox for the mail i had got frm this creep (had saved it when i'm in need of a laugh :D) here it is..

I find you online, I want be y’r friend and share my joy and happiness with U, I live in GOA and I want to tall U about beauty of GOA,

Please give a chans to be Y’r best friend.

If U get my mail then sent me mail early, I’m waiting for U.

Thanks you very much,
SO and SO.

And wait, theres more. I just did wht normal ppl do, ignore the stupid guy(?)...and Voila. Theres another mail frm him aftr sme 6 hrs he had sent the earlier mail. Here it is...

I M very shad now,

U don’t replay early I m waiting 4 U please mail me early

Please ple ppppppppppp…………………..

Your So and SO.

Jeez!! i laughed my lungs out :D

shub said...

"do give me a hollar" I say someone give this guy a collar and put the guy on leash!!

Kais said...

Hmm ... I tend to agree with anons point. I've never regretted crashing and burning spectacularly, many times over, with corny lines (in real life, not "online"). The girl can shoot me down, go home and smirk about it on her blog for all I care :P

The only ones I find real hard to live down are the times when the opportunity was there and I just stood there and did/said nothing because I was thinkng of the mythical "perfect line" or was just too chicken.

Cheers
Kais

jade said...

this is wht i got. not very funny...
"hi...if u r interested in makin frndship then I have time 4 u"
me:???!!!

Thanu said...

the joys of being married...
My profile says married and hence no one is "wanting" friendship with me.

dharmu said...

hehehe, wat a read to start my day in the boring office.

jeez,they blocked orkut in my office nahi tho abhi sab ladkon ko aise line bhejthi. atleast i would have got an exclusive coverage on ur blog,
"the innecent gal who doing wants making freendship with lovely decent boys"

BTW, what u wrote is so true, orkut has some real "namunees" who kinda leech on profiles.

and sayesha bahi, u gave me a good idea for one post. i had a good "scrappy" experience last ngith. will add it in mine, thanx!!!

dharmu said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Rebellion said...

Err...
Sash...
Are the guys even gonna comment on this post or no???
hehehe =))

Take care,
Aarti :P

Sakshi said...

Hey Sayesha.. Great one. It was also one of the reasons I stopped putting pics on the net. Too many crazy people mailed me and they all fit in the categories you have sent.I don't understand why guys believe that they can pull off "How you doing' aka Joey" when their pick up lines just suck...

shub said...

"If you like then give one tinkle to me "
:O
yeh tinkle kya hota hai?!~ :O
tickle? =))
or the comic book tinkle? this is too funny!:D

Lalit Singh said...

ROTFLMAO
one hell of a collection...now you know why they call it "Scrap" book
and what about the line i told you the other day
"Heylo madam.. i waant to frandshib you."
how could you forget the cheeziest of all lines???? :-O

As a puinishment I will bombard your Scrap book with this line now... and more cheezy lines until u 'make frandshib' with me
MWAHAHAHAHA

shub said...

" HI AM royalboy. hi i am looking for a good friends out here......jokers pls stay away"

heeheehaahaahoohooo!! gosh i'm gonna be sitting all night readin re-reading them and laughing myu head off!

Lalit Singh said...

all these weirdos apart.. i think it is a great medium to reconnect with old people...i have re-established contact with people from my school coll and just about everywhere thanx to orkut

satish said...

so all the gals!

DOnt you ever think that world is full of dull and UNsophisticated people.

i am a sensible and straight, simple and jovial and understanding and well-mannered and caring andfun-loving and passionate guy. i am in desperate need of a girlfriend and after seeing your profile (haan sayesha ji aapka!) i am pretty sure that you can be given an oppurtunity of being in my arms.

so reply to this comment(wittingly) and i might consider giving you my cell number.

till then, keep on 'wanting'.

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Bol lo ... bol lo... ek baar mauka mila to saare ladko ko bol lo --- apna bhi number aayega!!

Ok, Sayesha, about what you were asking... I tried something similar. You see, my name is commonly mistaken for a gal's because it is just gramatically correct to write 'SUDIPTA'. But the fun starts when I enter Yahoo chat rooms... and I can assure you that. Once, I was dead bored, and I ping-ed a guy with a similar screen name (crazy_romantic_lover) or something... and had actually opened the conversation myself :)

After that, lets just say, I had loads of fun! :D

The Draconian Devil said...

hey sayesha!! i've been reading your blog for quite a while now (thanks to Navdeep who piqued my interest by telling me about the plagiarism...) and i love your posts! they're straight from out of your life!!! not masalafied or twisted or anything. i wish i could post as often as you.

so anyway, I also knew you were writing a post on this sexually desperate frand sip needers; i saw that scrap of yours on Navdeep's scrapbook. Well orkut hasn't been too bad so far (though I'm illegally in...muhuhahaha) but hi5 has been quite a pain!!

Message from: Ashok
To: Shayeri
Subject: hi

first thing first you look cute as lil lily so you and one more thing you are dman beautiful smile


the first thing that struck me was the horrendous English used by the guy, so I replied:

Message from: Shayeri
To: Ashok
Subject: RE:

ya thanks. though i must say, your english is abysmally horrible.


that didn't even put off the guy!! he replied back!! can you believe that?? Even though I insulted him to spitting on the father of all languages he had the audacity to think I'd still prefer "fren sip" with him...hrmph!

Message from: Ashok
To: Shayeri
Subject: Thx for the compliment
(compliment???!!!!!!! WHERE on earth did i "compliment him??!!)

: oh thank you very much but to tell you sayeri its ok that my english is horrible atleast i'll have something to learn from a little cute young lady like you i hope you wont deny form that privelage and amybe i can let you know that i had done my schooling from st. pauls and moreover i had got 94 in my boards in english its just a matter of chance that i just opted to go in army and my english and a downfall maybe by having a friend like acn make me a better englishman willll it so may i have the pleasure of asking you to be my friend can i please i hope your reply would be affirmaitive s it should be of an self esteeemed aldy of high prestige will it ?

Conclusion: no one wants to die virgin. especially if the symptoms of sexless death begin to show, then they will go to any extent, so much so that they'll message someone almost half their age!

and of course, you have to be dumb to think i replied to him....i have good frands. thanks you bheri mach.

good post :D

~shayeri

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

Hahahahahahaha!!!!! So, you finally did it, huh?! :P :D :D I was laughing my head off reading this stuff...what 'skills' those despos have, man! :P
Here's another one that I got today:
u visited my profile and no scrappy scrappy??? lolz
Haha, very funny. *yawn*

And yet another one:
hi. uh photo tuhadi hai?
Asking me if my pic is really mine? Get a life!

And perhaps the 'religion' that I've specified there on Orkut is also making depsos use new tactics.
See this one:
Hi navdeep.. i m quite amzd to see a girl belngng 2 a sikh family in atheists cmmnty... Well i wud lyk to offer frndship to u... n i hope tht i ll be able to gain some knwldge frm u... nd share thoughts with u.. will u be my frnd???
Mannn!!! I'm amazed how I managed to understand this scrap with gobbled up vowels! Loser. X-(

Hahaha, funny, FUNNY post! I even have this girl in my friend list who has written in her profile, "I decline ALL 'frandship' offers!" :P Hehehe.

I'm gonna save those "pearls of wisdom" of the despos. :P

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

And Shayeri had made me read that message by Ashok. I had gone crazy laughing over it!! :D
And what's the connection between Army and the "downfall in standard of English"? Most Army men know English quite well! Loser dud. Blaming HIS problem on our country's army! X-(

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

And let me declare that I AM BEFORE TGFI AND ROHIT!!!!!! Yeeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaa!!! :D :D :D
**does a victorious wardance**

Oh, and Sayesha, were you seriously jealous of the wastage of time that we people were doing on Orkut? :P :P :P

Sirius Black said...

lolzzzz awesome post.
These CD activities are getting pretty much outta hands on these websites like hi5 and orkut.
I knw a girl who got on orkut and after puttin her real display pic got more then 1000 scraps in 1 day.

But the sad part is that due to some Despos all guys image gets screwed :-s

Shekhar said...

I have seen a couple of such scraps in my gf's scrapbook too. Seriously, these guys must be idiots of the highest order. God only knows what makes them persevere.

And as for sensible guys on orkut, they just direct people to the 'committed' tag under their names on their profile. :D

Singh said...

As to what makes them tick...
...I had a friend who actually posted Frandship messages. And for every hundred posts, three-four girls actually responded (positively).

In the CompSci world that's what we refer to as a brute-force algorithm. :)

Venky said...

This does sound like all the gals ganging up against the boys and another intersting point to be noted is that majority of the comments to this post till now are from the gals themselves...So now time for the guy's perspective

1. All guys are not lucky as me so they have to keep trying their luck :D
2. Most guys have been brought up on movies like DDLJ which spreads the msg that until a gal is not married you are still in with a chance
3. It must be the god damn hormones
4. And hey we dont make fun of u when u go all emotional over a stupid movie scene cos we understand gals will be gals
5. We dont question you for remembering the dress Miss XYZ wore at the party three weeks ago (We dont even doubt your inclinations and believe that you are still straight cos if we make the same comment abt how wonderful Mr X's dress is, we are labelled as gay :))

This is getting too long so I will stop here. The fact of the matter is boys will be boys in some situations and gals will be gals in other situations, so live and let live should be the correct policy na?

Now I can just abt imagine the barrage, the band of sisters (Sash, tgwsw, ros and sg) is going to throw at me but hey somebody had to stand up for the guy community :)

Disclaimer: I feel it is not appropriate to hit on somebody with some stupid lines..guys who wrote all those stupid scraps, at least learn some good pick up lines :)

Cheers!!

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

Hey venky,
i was going to frame a point-by-point reply to all your points above. fir socha, jaane do. :)
you said it yourself- i've nothing against guys who know about the existence of vowels, rules of grammar and syntax trying to strike up an intelligible conversation. But the "will you make frnshp" camp? needs to get-a-life.

I cannot stand the shorthand lingo that plagues orkut, anyways. when will people realise that it is so ugly????
/there i go again!

Liz said...

Haha :) I can so relate to this post!:) Guys will be guys ...i've had so many of these msgs i've had to put a little note rite on top saying i'm only in orkut to meet up with old friends!! Sheesh, now they've made me sound all unfriendly ..lolz! But Orkut has been FAAAB - i've met up with soooo many long lost fraaandsss =D

PS: danke for the address..will definitely go down to B'bay cafe next time:)

Btw, its a little strange the guys are not replying...hmmm are they in on this too ;)??

Sumit Tada said...

Ya have never seen girls using such lines but they DO send friend requests straight away!!
And when you ask: "do i know you?"
Either no reply or "No but yaa you CAN know me"...
But what is the use of all this?? Everyone knows there are people like this at every place,was it a surprise???

Mary said...

Hahaha! very funny :)) Once I got this mail through orkut..

"
THIS MESSAGE IS ONLY AN OPTION....I AM EXPECTING REPLIES FROM ALLOVER INDIA....SO U PLEASE RESPOND AND DONT THINK THAT I AM CONSIDERING ALIANCES ONLY FROM ABROAD OR ABROAD CONNECTED.....


Hello, M. here! .Saw your profile and liked it very much. If you like my profile, please accept my Contact.Even if not please inform me. CIVIL ENGINEERING HAS GOOD SCOPE & POTENTIAL IN AUSTRALIA NOW…. .AS I KNOW AUSTRALIA IS A CIVIL ENGINEERING HEADQUARTERS……..SO THERE WILL B NO PROBLEM OF EMPLOYMENT 4 ME IN ANY WHERE IN AUSTRALIA(USA/UK/CANADA ANYBODY FROM THESE COUNTRIES ALSO PLEASE RESPOND)……GIRLS IN INDIA HAVING RELATIVES IN AUSTRALIA /NZ/UK/CANADA PLEASE ALSO RESPOND …WHOSE BROTHER, SISTER..UNCLES…….PARENTS………WHO ARE IN ABOVE THESE COUNTRIES ALSO RESPOND …....BEING A GRADUATE CIVIL ENGINEER I AM INTERESTED IN BRIDES FROM AUSTRALIA/NEWZEALAND…SO THAT I CAN IMMIGRATE 2 AUSTRALIA..SO THAT I CAN GET THE PERMANENT RESIDENCY STATUS IN AUSTRALIA…SO THAT I CAN IMMIGRATE WITH SPOUSE….SO WITH THAT SPECIAL INTEREST I AM CONTACTING YOU…I HOPE THAT U WILL TAKE THIS EFFORT SERIOUSLY……I EXPECT A REPLY FROM U ANY WAY…GOOD FORTUNES………Send me your residential address & telephone Number. Email:****or ***** . my mobile no:****** or ****** or ******. Good Luck.My jeevansathi.com id : M. my shaadikaro.com id is w. .My Yahoo Messenger chat id: w_m( NORTH/NORTHERN KERALA )..........I AM LOOKING FOR KERALITES/NORTH INDIANS FROM KERALA OR…….. FROM NORTH INDIA( ANY WHERE INDIA) & ABROAD...SO KERALITES OR NORTH INDIANS IN INDIA OR ABROAD...such as IN KERALA NATIVE DISTRICT CAN BE CALICUT/BADAGARA/NILESHWAR/MAHE/KANNUR/TELLICHERY/KANHANGAD/MANJESHWAR/COCHIN/ kasargod/Gokarn*(THESE ARE ALL ONLY PREFERENCES)/USA/UK/AUSTRALIA/CANADA/AFRICA/COMBODIA/TANZANIA.GIRL CAN BE ANY COMMUNITY I LISTED BELOW..........HINDU THAT\'S ALL.........Roy/das/sen/dasgupta/bose/sukul/dutta/ghosh/sengupta/pal/chakroborthy/gupta/mehta/kulkarni/jani/jain/chatterjee(chattopadhyay)/banerjee(bandhopadhyay)/mandal/mondal/gupta/ganguly(gangopadhyay)/dey/biswas/guha/saha/gaur/desai/sawant/deshmukh/kelkar/kulkarni/patekar/patil/bahlerao/menon/nair/malabarian nambiars/deshpandey/patel/modi/dash/kar/Sarma/Ray
. Send me ur astro info : ie: time of birth, date of birth,place of birth; my birth details are 21/01/197*,12.17pm, Trichur , kerala mithun rashi dev gan nakshatra : mrigasira .(MAKEERAM) you send your horoscope &PHOTOGRAPHS…….. by post. Most suitable deva gan nakshtras for me Hastha(ATHAM)(kanya rashi(virgo)),uttrapalguni(UTHRAM)(virgo), Punarbasu((PUNARTHAM)gemini/cancer),Revathi(pisces) . Aswini(ASWATHY)(((Aries)optional)). I am looking for girls with these nakshtras. Other suitable nara gan nakshatras poorvapadrapada(PURORUTTATHI(pisces/aquarius),UTTRAPADRAPADA(UTHRATTADI),uttrashada(UTHRADOM),Rohini,(swati(CHOTHI)(thul (libra)) ,Shravana(THIRUVONAM) (MAKAR)devgan) Fine! Regards M.

:O :O :O all I could do was laugh so hard!!

American Pi said...

Orkut sucks. Friendster is better.

I dont have any email stories, though once in a pub - a gal sent her friend over to tell me that she wanted to take me home. Like I was a free gift or something.

Duhita said...

Hmmm....Sash, dumb Q, but what's Orkut?!?! And wow that must've taken a while to compile!

Pakku said...

Let me not blame it on the hormones we possess. I am because of them. First thing first, as Venky pointed out, not all guys are eternally gifted. Henceforth, they keep on trying to get that perfect match!! Did I say Perfect?? It is such a misnomer these days.

After all, they are just carrying forward the legacy of mammals, that the dominant s** (ok, the non-fairer s**, hope this augurs well) should make the first move. Don’t they like to be pursued!! Exceptions, well there are quite a few. But, it does not deserve to be called Exceptions; it tends more towards traits in gals profile page.

- Gals having sausy movie star snap as their profile photo.
- Friends chatting with each other on Orkut page, so that her scrapbook entry increases, albeit they are sitting right across in their company.
-He: typical pataofy lines
She: Do you know bablu?
He: Yeah, I know him (justifying his lie to himself as his mom used to call his younger bro, bablu…lol)
She: Hi xxxxx, Lets be friends

Kati hui patang haaan! The gals profile says, I want to make new friends, but she wants to validate if the person knows bablu. Pathetic!!

- Gals who send friend requests to a guy, if they see a Microsoft/Oracle/Motorola… in his communities list. Or those, who just dropby but doesn’t scrap, knowing that Orkut would trace them, so that the guy comes back to them and initiates the talk.

- Gals who are married, but still put up their status as ‘Committed’. Why? Yeps, obvious reasons.

- Those who feel that the number of “you are beautiful-you are good-looking.. wanna be friends??” scraps would increase their brand value compared to her friends.

It can just go on. May be it’s a rule to pursue and be pursued. After all, you are “fairer” than us.

Sorry Sayesha, for eating up your space.

Footnote: No advocacy for those pathetic damn lines.

Harsha said...

Ashamed to say as a guy, never said any of those stuff ;)

Dev said...

Howlarious!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

I've seen loads of this on Orkut... especially when it comes to girls who put up their pic. "I went thru your profile (translates I saw your pic) and I want to do frandship with you". Did ya know there's a community on Orkut called Nazim frandship and loveship (or somethin like that) dedicated to this line? It's too good! :D

And tch tch... you beat me to Gold on Dharmu's blog? Waaaah! :( Ab tu uske blog par subah ke chaar baje kya kar rahi thi?

The Girl Who Sold The World said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Girl Who Sold The World said...

@Pakku:
I'm in a grumpy mood this morning. So, I'm sorry, I can't ignore all that crap that you've spewed here.
I like dissection and I'm gonna do just that on YOUR comment.

Gals having sausy movie star snap as their profile photo.
I assume you wanna say "saucy". And well, mind defining what that would be? Something like Bipasha Basu wearing a tank top? What's the big deal in that? However, people like me, ROS, Smiling Girl, Sayesha and a majority of other girls that I know and who get these kind of lame messages have perfectly normal pics...oops, maybe they're "sausy" in your eyes. Too bad.

Friends chatting with each other on Orkut page, so that her scrapbook entry increases, albeit they are sitting right across in their company.
Funny. What's the big deal about scrapbook entries and their count? Alright, even if we assume that people do this stuff, SO WHAT?! Does that mean random despos will message them saying, "hai, wnna frnshp?" ?

The gals profile says, I want to make new friends, but she wants to validate if the person knows bablu. Pathetic!!
Firstly, a lot of despos message even those who clearly say that they're not on Orkut to befriend random people.
As for this "Bablu" jazz, have you ever heard of something called "initiating a conversation"? Perhaps the girl does want to be friends with him and that was just another way of getting talking?

Gals who are married, but still put up their status as ‘Committed’.
Wow, how do YOU know that? Been spying on ALL the girls on Orkut or what?

After all, you are “fairer” than us.
Wow, wel said, well said...*applauds* BUT pretty archaic...*crinkles her nose*.

Footnote: No advocacy for those pathetic damn lines.
Hahaha, yeah, right. No ADVOCACY. It's just a justification...a pathetic and lame one at that.

that the dominant s** (ok, the non-fairer s**, hope this augurs well)
Oh, and what's the thing that you starred? The word "sex"??? Something wrong with it? It's not a swear word, is it? Alright, alright, just for the prudish taste's sake, why don't you make it "gender"? Or does that need to be starred too? Perhaps you consider it some word which is equivalent to some really really "bad" word, something that you'd just utter in the dark, to save yourself from others' glares because of the "offensiveness" that just escaped your mouth.



@Sayesha:
Sorry, I just saw red after that lame comment. I couldn't resist. I've thrown in my two cents worth. Delete this if you consider it rude. :)

Trip said...

Trip<<< wonders if this could be the perfect post to start a male vs female argument. (Please be taking of notice, dat i am using male/ female not mail/ femail), eber science i buyed my new dictionary, (and i had to spell that correctly in fear of being branded a pervert...errrr hmmm), i be lurnin to spail like a greek god!
*Finally making a point*- I refuse to take up cudgels for the males here. How am i ever gonna explain the line, Cute_smart_rich_sensitive_etc guy lookin for franship? ... Dude, why you single then? Is it only because of your grammar? So that would imply, that if you bought spellcheck, youd be a stud! Invest in it dude, it comes free with MS Word!
PS- Was contemplating starting a little thread, quoting lines women use when the real studs walk away after a short relationship, but realised it wouldnt be a very smart thing to do on a ladies blog, especially since my girlfriend comes here for a dekho!
Cheers...
And if any of you ladies receives a "Hollar" for "Franship", worry not, Trip is gonna come up with a posting of replies.
PS- sorry about the Zorbaism , but we do claim to be politically correct, " Something for Everyone" yes even you tards and pervs and Spellomaniacs.

And before you start another little war here, Im not being serious about any of this...just another lame attempt at humour/ humor( for the americanised).

Phoenix said...

it's so true and in so much taste that i cant even find it amusing any more

DD said...

Awesome compilation :)
And a few girls (or ppl who claim to be!) hv sent me requests on orkut with some really insane messages, it is not just limited to guys sending to gals! i delete off most of them...some of the better ones:
Hey cute pic, like to be friends?
Hi deepak let us b friends
Is this kid u? very nice
So hows work? (!!!)

:))

Pakku said...

@tgwstw:
Chillax Lady!!! Thanks for taking time to respond to my "lame" comment. But shall not respond to those surly cranky stuff as I feel guilty of using this pristine page for doing so, but for the last comment. Shall surely do so in an appropriate forum.

I used S**, as most search engines consider the webpage as "Adult-Content" if they confront such kinds. Hope you would not wish that :-)

Its been said that, before the "amrutham" is extracted, you shall get the venom. Obliged wud I be, if so.

C'est La Vie

Raj said...

//I thought that guys of our generation are not so dumb anymore

I know this may make me sound like a snob but its the truth. When you go out on the streets of India, don't you find these guys in a bunch of 4-5 on the roadsides n corners. They do belong to ur generation but still don't. And lets not forget the rural-urban divide. Guys from the villages and towns are only too happy to see all these girls in search of "friends" on the "internet".

So just ignore them like you ignore those guys on the streets.

pradster13 said...

absolutely hilarious, i got here from navdeeps orkut profile and man you write good!.
you know females have a fair share of these faux passes as well...

for example.."wanna do friends?"
hell lady! i dont "do" my friends...

and since i didnt reply to this one i got another one .."wanna do good friends?"
aarh get a life banshee! or are you inviting me over to a production of the the sitcom?

i guess more often than not, these weirdos have these lines written and then copy paste them into every profile that they can stalk...sheesh!!

p.s. navdeep seems to be moderating the replies or atleast scouting around them like a punjab police cop with a lathi in hand..."mainu dar lagda hai" so i hope you reply to this comment before she gives me" her 2 cents worth"
take care

Jeevan Baretto said...

Now, do u mind me posting comments on ur blog??

debottam said...

hahahaha...Sayesha...i hav been following ur posts 4 some days now..cudnt resist commenting on this..these are really crap and weird!!
hilarious collection!
:D

Vinod R Iyer said...

Hey Sayesha ...First time commenting on ur posts !! Good collection :D

By the way did u know there are a million girls who do respond to such wierd requests...I can say that frm my frnds' exp ...they have received amazingly dumb replies too !! (I have to defend the guys:))

But yes many of the guys can get desperate and they do show it off most of the times :d

Apy said...

Hahaha.. That was cool... Me n a friend still wonder.. How does one "make friendship"?? (just heard of makin love..lol..okay okay .. no more crap Apy)...wheneva she gets scrap like that, it leaves us laughing and wondering...

I guess you covered all... lol..

IndianArchie said...

Mamu...

I am wanting to do frandsheep with you too. I am young and fanciful of you. I want frand sheeps with honest and lovely persons suchlike your dear shelves. Will you do frand sheeps with me also?

We can sit together on charpoy and laugh and swing legs in air below. You can teaching me engliss also. Much joy happen. Contact fastly, before someone als does.

Where I can see yourshelves Orkut profiles?

IndianArchie
Musings that Amuse

Inder said...

The types of jealousy in blogworld that you listed are so very true... :)
About Orkut... It is a good place to meet old friends. It is also a place inhabitated by people with the high that anonymity gives. With the anonymity of a false profile they enjoy letting loose their inner perversion. These characters are found in all chat rooms. Batakthi Aathmaayein...

Sudeep said...

ROFL!!! absolutely fab collection..

but first mez happy tht we all could beat Sayesha on orkut n had a gud gud time :P

me too always wondering why gals never put on such things on guys' scrapbooks..

but one gal had scrapped last fortnight
found ur profile very interesting n i want to know more about u

Sudeep said...

orkut yahan block kar diya hain..
:(

now m smelling a 'fish' in this :P

Rebellion said...

:O:O:O
S-A-Y-E-S-H-A...

Where are youuuuuuuuuuu???
Soo much of hungama happening on your blog and you're laapata!?! :O

Come soon yaar,
Take care,
Aarti

PS: Hope you didn't take another dose of panadol.. rather, 2 panadols??? :P

Venky said...

@The_Girl_From_Ipanema
"fir socha, jaane do. :)"
:)I was getting all geared up to unleash my volleys at you and then wanted to include this in the wierdo article I have to do cos of ur tag :D but fir socha jaane do :P

@Sayesha
too bad u start off a controversial topic and then sit back and enjoy..hmmm Kevin does not like this at all :)(for the uninitiated http://venkysays.blogspot.com/2006/06/friends-can-be-your-worst-enemies-i.html, Kevin and IAN are always at logger head and kevin always kicks IANs ass :)--> )

How do we know said...

cldnt finish reding the post.. rolled on the floor laughing long before that.. bythe 15th sterling example, actually!

Dreamcatcher said...

Brilliant post
My favourites
I wanna do frndship with you
I wanna make frndship with you
I wanna have frndship with you
Then the bizaare ones
What toothpaste do you use??(WTF)
I am waiting for your sharp, frndly, original response.
Guy to a frnd - i wants to be your sex slave!!! (that was a message though, not a scrap)
And I have had very bored friends on occasion scrap guys who have wanted to make frndship( sheer fun). A girl did however scrap a guy I know on orkut saying she was desperate to make frndship with him but it was only a joke.

Siddhu said...

hahahahaahaahaahahahahahahahahahahaaa

Sayesha said...

You can do it, Sayesha.
Deeep breath.


#Sunshine,
I'm guessing 'NEVER'! We're meant to advance at a faster rate than these inferior beings! :D

#Saty,
Made it up?? Sheesh! Why why why would I do such a thing?? :O

#Aarti,
:)

#Anon,
Try?? Try to do what?? And you think it's such a cool thing which you try to do that because we don't do it, we're not gutsy?? Hahahahaah! :D

#Aarti,
:D

#Nirwa,
Hahahaha! Weirdos and creeps are everywhere, yeah? Not just on Orkut! :)

//4 ever so will u like 2 be my frnd

Gosh I hate to see words like this! :/

#Kroopz,
Gosh your list is HILARIOUS! I nearly fell off, laughing!! :D

#Freebird,
Hahahaha! See you made him "shad"! You should have given him a "chans" yaar! :P

#Shub,
Hahahahaha! :D

#Kais,
Please don't insult yourself by comparing your witty self to these dhakkans! :O

#Jade,
What's with all the making, man?? :D

#Thanu,
Hahahaha! You make me wanna get married! :D

#Dharmu,
Lovely decent boys?? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :D

#Aarti,
Aayenge, aayenge... sab aayenge... time lagta hai.. slow dimaag hai na! ;)

#Sakshi,
Hahaha! They need a tutorial in using original lines! :)

#Shub,
Hahahaha! I laughed so hard when I read tinkle! He means a phone call I suppose? :O

#Lalit,
Sorry sorry, added it in! :P

#Shub,
Hahahaha! :D

#Lalit,
Yeah, gotta agree with you on that one! I found some long lost friends too! :)

#Satish,
Rejetted. Your English is too good for you to qualify.
:D

#Sudipta,
Hahahaha! You cheated! Poor guys! :D

#Draconian Devil,
OMG that was SO hilarious!!!! :D

#World Girl,
//amzd
//lyk
//frnd

Yikes! I can't stand this kind of language, it's really annoying! :/

//were you seriously jealous of the wastage of time that we people were doing on Orkut? :P :P :P

Of course I was!! That's why I asked ROS to send me an invite! :P I wanted to play too! :D

#Sirius,
Nahin yaar! No one's screwing every guy's image... we're just saying that net creeps have stayed the same over the years, that's all. :)

#Shekhar,
Hahaha! Wise man, you! :)

Suds said...

HAI Sayesha I also want to MAKE FRANDSHIP. lol that was a funny post...:):)

I have to join orkut now. I am missing something very important in life..:)

Enjoy

Sayesha said...

#Singh,
Hehehe... so brute-force algo worked for your friend. Cool! :D

#Venky,
Are you kidding me??? Read your comment once again and see how defensive you're getting! This post is not a guy-basher! This post is about net creeps and how they have not advanced in decades.

#Ipanema Gal,
Oh man! I was hoping you'd do that point by point reply to Venky. Darn!

//I cannot stand the shorthand lingo that plagues orkut, anyways.

I could hug you for saying that!!!!! :D

#Liz,
Yeah, loadsa old fraaands are on Orkut! :) And as far as the guys are concerned, they're reading but they dun wanna say anything in case they get bashed up by my sistahs! ;)

#Sumit,
Hahaha! Typical playing-hard-to-get behaviour of some chicks, eh? ;)

#Mary,
OMG Mary, I'm SPEECHLESS!!!! :D :D :D

#American Pi,
So was her free gift free to go? ;)

#Duhita,
You dunno Orkut???? Hahahaha I did not know what it was either! :P It's a platform for you to get in touch with old friends and get connected to your friends' friends.

#Pakku,
I have some 20 more comments to reply to. I'm sure someone will deal with all your points! ;)

#Harsha,
Man you should be proud of yourself! :P

#Dev,
Hahahahaha! Loveship! Hahahaha! :D

//Ab tu uske blog par subah ke chaar baje kya kar rahi thi?

Aha! Iska matlab I'm the blogger you don't like! :@

#World Gal,
Thanks, you lovely honest girl! Maza aa gaya! Tuney mera kaam aasaan kar diya, bachi! :D

#Trip,
//quoting lines women use when the real studs walk away after a short relationship, but realised it wouldnt be a very smart thing to do on a ladies blog, especially since my girlfriend comes here for a dekho!

Hey, that sounds like an AWESOME idea!! Do it do it do it!!!! :D

#Phoenix,
Bad taste you mean? :D

#DD,
That's it man... I'm gonna hunt you down on Orkut and find that cute pic! ;)

#Pakku,
Thanks for keeping my blog NC-16. :)

#Raj,
Hmmmm....

#Pradster,
Welcome to Sayeshaz! And dekh, I replied to you before Navs did! :p

#Jeevan,
Huh???? Have I ever said you can't?? :O :O :O

#Debottam,
Welcome to Sayeshaz and thanks! :)

#Vinod,
Welcome welcome! :) yeah, I read about the brute-force-algo above! :D

#Apy,
You're suprised about the making friendship bit?? I'm surprised about how two people can make a ship called frand ship. :/

#Indian Archie,
You want sheeps? You're scaring me now. :O

Much joy happen eh?? Hahahaha! :D Ok ok I will contact fastly otherwise you will be wanting to running away from this honest and lovely person's frand ship. :D

#Inder,
Hahahahha! Bhatakti aatmayein it seems! Hahahaha! :D

#Sudeep,
Oye! Now I am there na! Let's see who does the beating (up) now! :D

#Aarti,
Back back! :D

#Venky,
Ask Kevin to find someone his age! Kal ka chhokra Ian se takkar lene chala hai! Hah! :/

#How do we know,
Hope you managed to read all! :P

#Dreamcatcher,
Toothpaste??? Toothpaste????? Hahahaahaha! Really wanting to know everything about the other person, isn't it?? Hahahaah! :D

#Siddhu,
Saw your hilarious Orkut scrap! :D

chweety said...

hahah..interestin post girl...i jus got this hilarious one today.....goes like

"hi i am ----from --------. do u have bf? if not i love u "


what was he thinkin????????

cool_dude4u_realcute_longhair_johnabraham said...

Some girls still fall for it maybe...that's why it all goes on...of course most people have already moved to another level of stupidity, hopefully these will also learn.

Sunny said...

Yup... here's the other side of the coin... the girls-sending-moronic-messages bit:

1) "How come no one's written a testimonial to the femme fatale of ****... will you be friends with me" (sic)
femme fatale?? a guy??!

2) Hi... my friends call me sunshine because I spread love and to them love is light.

Orkut actually has a community for the worst pick up lines encountered by ppl!

Hitha's Space said...

Came across your blog really interesting series. heres my contribution just cant remmeber what the community name is. this guy opened a community saying looking for my soulmate. U should see the comments woman put across for frendzip :)

Rohit Talwar said...

Ahem. So I feature here! :D Yipppeeee!

MAN! I knew this was coming up on your blog...but SO many! Hahahaa! No dearth of losers! LOSERS!

Poor you! :D Now that your picture' up there, aren't you still getting such messages?! :P

The Anonymous said...

Read it somewhere.

Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship


Real prejudiced post :)

dharmu said...

are bahi, nothing to beat the scrap which found its way into my orkut last night.

intro:this guy Mr.V has been scrapping all the females listned in my 'friends' and i guess no one replied back. he seems particulary interested in one dame.

"hai, ur friend is not replying my scrap. please ask her to scrap me back. i am really interested to make her frendship. ur too. we can be good freinds. plz ask to scrap back"

:O ???

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Just to give you a proof of that the brute-force strategy works, so to say, look at this: http://sudiptachatterjee.blogspot.com/2005/12/mr-q-loves-dubai.html

Iday said...

Was jus following link after link and ended up in ur blog.
Quite a good one u have here.

This post is just too good :)
Cudnt stop laughing for quite some time :)

And yeah - i accept. Some guys are really desperate :(
And when stupid guys become desperate, this is what happens!!!
And I shud add - the intelligent ones end up making friends ;)

lil _kath said...

hahaha..lol! hilarious post again
^_^ Kawaii...
...yeah, guys are crazy sometimes, they still expect that gals falls on that nonsense messages!

..i had some before saying ** i think i knew u girl, can i add u to my list? BTW, where u from??
...huh?? ^_^ are u crazy? who are u?grrrr!!and where the hell u from too? sucks!!
...i blocked him now so its ok ^_^

cheers,
-kathy-

ritzkini said...

:)))
hai !!
:D

bachcha said...

it seems like every blog i read is making a post like this one !! seems like a hot topic huh ??

'neways' 'gud' read!!

Somya said...

too good sayesha. Even I have an a/c on orkut n keep getting all those trashy msgs and the worst part is that my friends take special pleasure in teasing me abt those later. Some of the funniest n latest ones r
1. hi somya....u have nice name...it contains so much sweet. aila ab se to logo ko apna naam hi khilaongi dinnerke baad.
2.Mere scrap Ko Tere Inbox Me Panaah Mil Jaye...
Agar Reply Nahi Kiya Toh Tera Scrapbox FANAA Ho Jaaye...! grrrrrrr
3. Hiii.... u look nice... gud profile contents too.. see u soon on yahoo messenger... bye and tk care (jaan na pehchaan main tera mehmaan).lol

Rebellion said...

//"You can do it, Sayesha.
Deeep breath."
Aawwwww.. that was sooooo cute :)

Boss.. great going.. I would definitely not have been able to do it.. for sure!!!

Take care,
Aarti

Sayesha said...

#Chweety,
Hahahahah! That is super hilarious! :D

#Cool whatever whatever,
I guess you're right... some girls do fall for it. :)

#Sunny,
Hahahahaha! I've yet to see one of those! :D

#Hitha,
Welcome to Sayeshaz! :) Community for soulmate, eh? Hahaha! :D

#Rohit,
Hahaha! Yes dear, you feature here :)
I still get a few messages now and then... some are so annoying I delete them! :/

#The Anonymous,
Hahahahaah! Meaningful Overnight Relationship! Hahahahaha! :D

#Dharmu,
Hahahaha! Arre yaar you should just "make his frenship"! :D

#Sudipta,
Yeah, checked it out :)

#Iday,
Welcome to Sayeshaz! :)
Agree with your stupid despo guy point! :D

#Lil Kathy,
Hahahaha! I have to learn how to block pple... haven't had to do it yet :)

#Ritzkini,
Hai, frend!! :P

#Bachcha,
Sheesh! Thanks! :P

#Somya,
OMG these are HILARIOUS!!!! :D

#Aarti,
Hehehe... :p

Hitha's Space said...

Nice post :) very hilarous

Deepak Menon said...

That was a hilarious string of introductions and I really laughed a solicited laugh at them and that prompted me to send this unsolicited message - I am checking out the blogs of Gangadhars Family of Blogs - FOB is what he calls them and so thats how I am here. Furthermore I have written 3 childrens books and it is nice to know one who is in the Childrens book department - so keep in touch
Deepak

Deepti said...

Hi Sayesha,

I'm posting a comment on your blog for the first time, though I have become quite a regular reader of your blog (thanks to my hubby.. Chirag).

I couldn't resist posting a comment after reading this entry. It just brought back a flood of memories from high school and college days. Notes that would be sent by guys on valentine's day/rose day/friendship day and all such days that were designed to make them feel like they needed to break all barriers of their vernacular language and try their hand at some Queen's English. :-))

Cheers,
Deepti

Reghu said...

ahem... ever taken a look at the Profiles of these "despos" who send u those messages... 1 in 2 u'd see a list that has >80% random gals... (just check it out!).

so, even tho its a shame there are such ppl who send mass messages to profiles that seem remotely female, sadder is the case of those girls who actually dont consider this suspicious, and jump in!

~Reghu.

SUNMAY said...

lol! u sure have a lot of patience ... compiling all that sure is commendable.

Amiya said...

Hilarious!!! Thanks for making me laugh my teeth out!!

On a serious note, dude there's some real lack of creativity in Orkut. I've received most of these compiled messages in some mutilated form or the other, all wanting to do nice/pure/decent/honest frandships with me.

Here's something I got in my Orkut inbox today:
Frendship is a lovely responsibility... will u carry it with me?
Get an ass to carry your responsibilities, you ass.

Awesome post! :D

A said...

rotfl this was so much fun!

Silver Mist said...

AWESOME!! AWESOME!! AWESOME!! AWESOME!!

Laughed my guts out!! Amazing! Just shows all of us have to face such perilous perils everyday!! :D

I got this the other day:
HI.
how r u.
i am deepak.
i am 19 years old cool guy.i lik singing ,dancing ,making frnds etc.
i assure u that i hav allthe qualities of a good frnd.
i do kno u ?


UGH! I didn't even get the meaning of the last line!!

ravi said...

liked what u have written but a piece of unsolicited advice wont do any harm (at least to me)..there are two kinds of people in this world...one, who write/support article like this and second, who date. he he.
ravi..

zoxcleb said...

great collection.... :-)
rightn ow in splits.. so cant say much more!

Jay said...

LOL! :-)

Dollar A Dozen said...

Dear Miss Editor,
//Hollar? You want a hollar? How about I give you a dollar and you go buy yourself a pocket book on the English language?

Ummm... the dude made a spelling error, so why dont you go check up the dictionary for 'holler'.

Sayesha said...

#Hitha,
Thanks :)

#Deepak,
Welcome and thanks for commenting :)

#Deepti,
Hiii! Thanks for dropping by! :)

#Reghu,
Yup, I'm sure there are girls who respond to these messages. Lalit even showed me a message that a girl sent to a guy! :)

#Sumnay,
Hahaha! A lot of it came from friends :)

#Amiya,
Thanks! :)

#Amarula,
Thanks! :)

#Silver Mist,
Hahahaah! I do kno u! Hahahaha! :D

#Ravi,
I assure you there are people who write articles like this and also date sensible people - you're looking at the blog of one of them right now :)

#Zoxcleb,
Thanks! :)

#Jay,
Hey, long time no comment! :)

#Dollar a Dozen,
Why do you have to drag my job into this, dear Mr. Critic? My being an editor has nothing to do with this. I have never claimed to be a master at the English language or the most perfect editor in the world. I have the right to laugh at whatever or whomever I please for whatever reason. Would really appreciate it if you don't drag my being an editor into what my posts are about. Thanks :)

arvind said...

never mind how i bumped into this post - esp since i don't even know you...

just wanted to point out some other angles to this that people end up missing

1. neither orkut nor women are alone in this. my (visibly long unused) friendster profile gets all sorts of porn scammers pretending to be women, as well as actual women leaving random meaningless messages - the only difference being that being americans their english is rather better. the problem seems to be non-existent only in controlled communities, like facebook

2. a lot of these people aren't even from india - they're from parts of africa, south america and so on, where internet access is still a novelty. they're so amazed with their ability to reach out to people in other parts of the world - these are usually countries with terrible information and communications systems - that they don't realise that internet communications is much more mundane for others than it is for them. even when they're from india, they've experienced a similar transition from information-poor to information-rich communications. which is why they're so enthusiastic. and again, it's not just men doing this - some research i did in nigeria a while ago showed enough women doing the same..

3. it's precisely because it's the internet that you get all these messages - an orkut profile does not carry all the signals that you give off in real life... do you think that if the persons involved saw you with your friends they would approach you? unlikely, since they would have a much better chance of evaluating success..

my point? some of these people are doing this because it *is their life*... not so funny anymore is it?

arvind said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
arvind said...

mea culpa, that was a double post, deleted

Sayesha said...

#Arvind,
I'm amazed. I'm so amazed at you. I'm amazed at your ability to take this post so seriously, and I'm amazed at your preaching words.

This post was not about Orkut, nor was it to drive home the point that "women don't do it". It was just some line I came across, found them funny, and put them up on my blog.

Tell me this, if you received this as a funny forward from your friend, would you send an email back to your friend preaching on the immoral act of laughing at something they found funny? Unlikely. Cos you'd become the wet blanket then. You'd just press the 'delete' button. But you would go to complete stranger's blog and leave a judgemental comment on why she shouldn't laugh at what she laughs. Why don't you just press the 'ignore' button?

Let me tell you my friend, half of the things we laugh at in movies is causing hurt to someone. People slip on banana peels, struggle with a foreign language, bam into a glass door, and we laugh. If we started to analyse every little thing we laugh at, we won't have much to laugh about, my dear.

arvind said...

christ, i *wasn't* preaching...

granted, you didn't write about orkut, but much of the comments were. but that is a minor issue.

i'm not saying that this isn't funny. the point was that it's not happening because these people are idiots, or are 'despo' - and please don't deny that half your reasons for finding these things funny are based on evaluations like that - but because of a specific social & mental process. knowing why someone does something doesn't detract from it's amusement value, does it?

so laugh all you want - hey i laughed too, at these and the chinese-to-english menu transliterations at restaurants, and at a million other things - but sometimes it is interesting to flip the coin and see what it looks like from the other side. of course, if that's what you're afraid of, or prefer not to have anything to do with it...

Sayesha said...

#Arvind,
I'm not afraid to see the other side of the coin. I just choose to blog only about the side of it that I want to blog about. Would you penalise me for that? :)

Must my blog posts show a 'balanced perspective' of things all the time? It's a blog for heaven's sake, it's just my thoughts for heaven's sake. :)

arvind said...

lawd. your vocab: penalise, preach...

(herewith passing up the opportunity to go all freudian on you)

relax, eh? i only made a comment on the world, just like you did. no need to hunt each other down over it, what?

arvind said...

here, i thought i was missing a smiley in there somewhere..

:)

Sayesha said...

#Arvind,

//lawd. your vocab: penalise, preach...

Yeah, some smart dude advised me earlier in this comment space to look up a dictionary. I guess I'm at the page with 'P' now. :|

//(herewith passing up the opportunity to go all freudian on you)

Eeesh! :(

//i only made a comment on the world, just like you did. no need to hunt each other down over it, what?

Yeah, maybe I got too defensive. You see, I've seen a lot of shit happening on this comments space. Guess I have been hardened. I don't have a problem with people having their own opinions and expressing them wherever they want. But when people (especially those who do not have their own blogs) get judgemental about your blog posts on your comments space, you gotta pick up the gun.

100th comment. Case closed.
:)

arvind said...

moi? judgemental?

*runs away screaming*

Sayesha said...

#Arvind,
Run, Arvind, run! Sayesha's comin' after you with her pitchfork. Man, you ruined her century.

praveen said...

Damn hilarious!
Had a hearty laugh...Great collection..

himanshu said...

1) U SURE ARE A GR8 GRUP OF PEEPS...
NEVER HAV I CAME ACROOS THESE MANY COMMENTS...


GOTTA COME HER MORE OFTEN

arvind said...

>> Sayesha's comin' after you with her pitchfork. Man, you ruined her century. <<

yeah, i wouldn't know, would i, about the pleasures of having exactly 100 comments? infidel non-blogger that i am... (though how that is supposed to be relevant or even accurate is beyond me)

arvind said...

>> Sayesha's comin' after you with her pitchfork. Man, you ruined her century. <<

yeah, i wouldn't know, would i, about the pleasures of having exactly 100 comments? infidel non-blogger that i am... (though how that is supposed to be relevant or even accurate is beyond me)

Sayesha said...

#Praveen,
Thanks! :)

#Himanshu,
Thanks! :)

#Arvind,
Do I sense mild sarcasm? ;)

LeoGirl said...

here one more tomy list "please pass my no to me.. wanna get ta know ya better"
This is in my scarp book.

Adnan Siddiqi said...

I dont know why Orkut has so much importance in peoples life.

I hardly visit my orkut profile.Scrapping personal issue is pretty stupid practise in my sight.

diabolic preacher said...

these scraps are worse than spam comments but funnier knowing that they come from real people....

angada said...

4. hi iam in ______ now! nice to seee u. i would like 2 make a frnd ship. thnx
[And what do you want me to do - buy you wood and metal for your ship?]

Ha! Ha! Ha!

piyu said...

Iam one of those silent readers who absolutely love ur blogs but dont comment...
i have been a late entry to ur 'bar' ;)
but have read each of ur posts...
and must say u rock!!! :D
i have been recommending ur blogs to my friends too..
but i just cannot 'not' comment on this.. :D have received a lot of crappy 'plz make frandship' msgs but this one takes d trophy for 'hilarious FRANDSHIP request of the month'.
- "hi,HOW r U.how is u r FRIENDS.I think u full FINE, how is u r studies,as u r friend saying that STUDYWELL, ok my name ****** from ANDHRAPRADESH,staying in TIRUPATHI.CAN i b FRIEND with u,suppose u r being with me friend,plz give REPLAY?"

i fell off my chair laughing, after reading it.
couldnt 'REPLAY' or make sense of it as much as i tried.. :D
Do note the use of CAPS and his play with words.. absolute genius, i say... ;)))

Rajan Soni said...

saw yr page link in other friend's blog.. really liked it. very funny...keep writing good stuff.. hey, would u like to make friendship with me??? hahaha..just kidding..

nikhil said...

nice,
nicely and smartly collected pieces........
but ya boys have reasons, and u being a gal should better know it.

Sharad said...

hi sayesha my name is sharad and i want to have friendship with you.. ;)

ha ha ha ha i was just joking that was a nice blog about orkut...

and ya dont worry i am not counting on you..,

zai jian...

anastacia said...

social networks are good to make friends but a little dangerous! There are many stalkers! : S I will walk away with all generic viagra

Arun said...

I was looking for a suitable place to point you to

http://mehreenkasana.wordpress.com/

Might prove to be an interesting blog.

That is how I came to this post (search string: blogs I might enjoy)

Reminded me the Beatles song:

All the lonely people, where do they all come from?
All the lonely people, where do they all belong?

Stupidosaur said...

Haha! Priceless! All of them but one. Ok this one is also priceless, but deserves your other reply, "Gotta applaud frankness" kind...


37. hi nice to c u here am an artiste and script writer am funloving caring person am not married not intrested,if ur int in me pls respond


I think he is saying he is not interested in marriage. Making fraandship is fine if you are interested.