Monday, November 28, 2005

Who's your angel?

A brown leaf floated about in the air and slowly landed on Sayesha's head.

Nope, it wasn't autumn.

It was a half-rotten leaf that had just detached itself from its tree and decided to use Sayesha's head as its helipad.

Sayesha looked up and just about missed something white falling from the sky.

No, it wasn't the first snowflake.

It was the first evening offerings of the bird sitting high up on the tree, looking down and grinning at her. (I know birds don't have any grinning apparatus, but apparently they can.)

So where was I?


Remember the company course that was cancelled due to hilarious reasons? Well, they finally held it today. It ended at five and I had a full three hours to myself before I met my friends for dinner. So I decided to go on a date. With myself. To Orchard Road. Not just for some girly shopping. I had been really curious about the tacky Christmas decorations Banana had described in her blog, and wanted to go check them out.

It was all that she had written and more! The decor was horrendous. Huge, ugly, tacky, loud.

In other words, my dil went yikes!

And as I walked along the road amidst the very distasteful Christmas decorations, threading my way through the busy crowd of people, all in a hurry, suddenly I felt a sudden rush of joy inside me. It was Christmas! And the gaudy decor , the rotten leaf, the bird-shit, could not do anything to dampen my spirits. My spirits were high, and it wasn't because of the orange juice I'd had in the afternoon. And I realised something -- the spirit of Christmas, more than around us, is in us.

The lady I bought a necklace from, said, "So how come you're here in Orchard Road on a Monday night?" I told her that I wanted to see the Christmas decor, and also because it gets so crowded during the weekend, that I figured the best day to come here would be a Monday night.

"Oh, you celebrate Christmas?" She looked amused.

"Yeah, I do..." I grinned back at her.

I do.

I'm not a Christian. And I don't really follow a religion. The only place where my religion shows up is when I have to tick that little box while filling forms. Other than that, I am not a religious person. I don't pray and I don't preach. (Perhaps it's because I don't like the idea of praying only when I need something and not praying otherwise.)

However, I do believe in celebrating. And I celebrate every freakin' thing that there is to be celebrated.

My earliest memories of Christmas go way back in time. When I was a little girl, my sis and I would hang stockings on the cords of the mosquito net on Christmas eve. After we had gone to sleep, Dad would fill our stockings with potatoes and onions (every year!!) and put them on top of the mosquito net. Sis and I would get up in the morning, all excited to see the stockings filled to the brim. We would turn them upside down and scream in indignation. My sis would go, "Dad, not this year too! It's not even funny anymore!" And I would start bawling. Dad would be grinning and Mom would watch the whole scene with a "I've given up on this guy" expression. And finally, the real Christmas gifts would come out. Every year.

And I would make a little Christmas tree with shiny green paper, and decorate it with all kinds of shimmery stuff. And there would be an angel at the top.

The Christmas angel. The one who would make all my wishes come true. The one who would spread the spirit of joy and love.

I am 25 years old now. There is no Santa. There is no Christmas angel.

Or is there?

In Kal Ho Na Ho, Jenny tells her kids, "Whenever we're in trouble, God will send an angel for us, who will take away all our tears and fill our lives with joy." And the kids prayed and waited. And then Shah Rukh turned up. Just another human being, just a neighbour. But an angel for that troubled family. (Now now, I am not praising the movie here, we all know SRK sucked in that movie, I'm only looking at the basic script of the story.)

It set me thinking. Is an angel really going to turn up one day to take away all our tears and fill our lives with joy? Or are we waiting in vain? What's the angel like?

Who is an angel really? If it's just another human being, could it really be that neighbour? Or perhaps that friend of ours? And most importantly, why do we need to wait for our angels?
Why can't we be our own angels? Why can't we be each others' angels? We certainly have the ability to take a few tears away, and the ability to bring some joy into the lives of those around us.

And if we're all angels, then whom are we waiting for?


Christmas is almost here. I can feel it in my bones. It's the season of loving and giving and sharing. (Gosh I'd better stop, I'm starting to sound like Joey Tribbiani now!) It's the season of love and showing it to those you love. It's time for yet another celebration.

A celebration that I needed real bad in my life right now.

Sayesha is happy today. Really really happy.

To all the angels I have in my life, I want to send a big kiss and a hug, and I want to thank you for being the angel and taking away some of my tears and bringing me joy.

Our wait is over. We are Santa. We are the Christmas angel.



54 comments:

ritzkini said...

phursht !! finally !!
:)

ritzkini said...

/* A celebration that I needed real bad in my life right now.
Sayesha is happy today. Really really happy. */
sorry...but...doesnt sound so...
anyways...we fight our own battles...alone...
inshallah,you succeed...

Pujya said...

3rd???

Rays Of Sun said...

Angels, yeah..they do exist..I have two angels, one is a happiness angel and the other is a guardian angel:)
Donno if that makes much sense?

Pujya said...

onions and potatoes??? wow i never thought of it..now i know where all ur 'creativity' comes from.

------------------
hey tell u something...even i have no clue about it..so dont freak out!! i had a question in my paper "describe a person you know" and i have really no idea..i wrote about u.. and boy i got the max marks for that question..seriously.

Young Master said...

i know exactly what you do these days for christmas

inhas said...

i always had one question in my head.. do angels have angels looking after them??? Guess everbody needs some body looking over them...

Thanu said...

C'mas season always makes me happy. Can't wait to put up my tree this year.

-thanu

Pi said...

Ro: A christmas party is in order. ;) Ha ha ha

Sayesha said...

#Ritzkini,
Errr..

#Viks,
Errrrr!!!

#Ritzkini,
Oooh, reading too much, are we? I am happy, and when I am, I say so :)

#Aethyr,
Errrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

#ROS,
Everything makes sense to someone somewhere :)

#Aethyr,
Yeah, my Dad has a very odd sense of creativity! :P

*Sayesha trying not to freak out*
What??? You wrote an essay about me?? What did you write?? Can I see it?? Could you email it over?? :O

#Chints,
Wait till you see my wishlist, buddy. Your fake wings will drop off! ;)

#Ro,
I have no clue! Pray tell me?

#Inhas,
Hmmm... perhaps they do have some form of outsourcing, who knows? :)

#Thanu,
You have a tree?? Wow! My ex flat-mate had one too, and it used to sit pretty and glittering in the living room :)

#Viks,
You see all the time. But the question, my friend, is whether they see you or not! ;)

#AP,
I want a Christ-mas party this year, not a Kris-tine party again! ;)

Anonymous said...

14th!.. 11th! if you ignore the multiple comments by the same person :p

And whats so ugly about the decorations on the Orchards road? I saw the photo on banana's blog...sab kuch to hai usme, alag alag tarah ki ice-creams hain, popcorn hai, snow-man hai, gaddi hai, gol gol ghoomne wala charkha hai, charkhe pe red dil bhi hain bane huye...theek thak to hai. Tujhe accha nahin laga?? :|

Tinku

Anonymous said...

#Ro,
I have no clue! Pray tell me?

<===>

#AP,
I want a Christ-mas party this year, not a Kris-tine party again! ;)

Hint hint!

Sayesha said...

#Tinku,
It's too many things man! Too many colours, too many shapes, too many elements, there's no unity to the design! I dun like. :(

#Viv,
Hahahahah! Noooooooooo!! Ok I have got a classic foot-in-the-mouth situation I guess! :O
ps: I am all set for a Chris-tmas party, if all you guys promise to be there too! After all, it's only fair, isn't it? ;)

#Chints my dear,
Sometimes all I wish for is a smile on my face. :)

Anonymous said...

Nice article. Had a surreal feel to it!

Ive been a 'wannabe' christian ever since (convent) school. Great festivals, good food and no weird clothes required in church.

And then theres the weddings ...

In my more un-macho moments (rare, very rare ...), I've been known to admit that I love christian weddings. Beautiful churches, lovely music and fiery brides in contagious white. In fact sometimes I dream ... woah, enough said!

- Kais :)

Anonymous said...

Such a beautiful post Sayesha. I don't know why I was all misty-eyed!! (go away tears!) :-)

I laughed thinking about your Dad's fun prank of filling up the stockings with onions & potatoes....haha :-)

Being another's angel....how true.
We can really be each others' angels.

Despite the cold, I love this time of the year.

virdi said...

birdie did popo on your head... hahahahahaha...

Sayesha said...

#Kais,
Don't give up your dreams, my friend. You could have a Christian wedding after your usual one! What's stopping you? The possibilities are endless! ;)

#Harshi,
Thanks! :) We can totally be each other's angels, in fact, I feel like a lot of people on my blog, some whom I have never seen or met, are my angels :)

#Virdi,
This calls for a poem:

Who did popo on my head? Birdie!
Who did popo on my blog? Virdi!

ps: And yes, it rhymes! If you say it the right way! :D

Unknown said...

I once met a psychic(not a professional,just a friend i was introduced to), who told me that we have spirits(read:angels) around us all the time. And that it was a mistake on our part to assume that its the wind that's blowing past us,every time! :)...I have a lot of reasons to believe what he says cos all his predictions for my future came true!

Anonymous said...

u wanna see uglier decorations? look at a bride in kerala! ahahahahahahah!!! *ROFL!* *sniff!*

u mah aaaangel...meeeerakil...*bats eyelids at mah stud muffin, virdee*

wish someone wud break the a/c in my office. bbrrrr!!

Shobana said...

cool post!
the guardian angel funda was quite amusing to me when i was a kid n i used to look out for some sign or inkling from my angel saying'don worry i am here'
now i have better sense n i too agree that angel dont necessarily have to be those heavenly beings, we can be each others angels. and i do have a lot of angels watching over me all the time:)

Jay said...

Remember reading ,

" There are four stages in each one of us

1. U believe in Santa Claus.
2. U don't believe in Santa Claus.
3. U are Santa Claus.
4. U look like Santa Claus"

Y said...

First time in here.

Long and Gyaani stuff.

Leon said...

Let's hear it for the CHRISTMAS SPIRIT.. :-)..

Sahil said...

oh ho. someone was feeling very sentimental today?

We dont know how and when someone will come to give and share with us, and make such a difference to our lives. These people come when u least expect them too, like an angel.

A towel-clad angel at that.

Rays Of Sun said...

Virdi and Sash,
Nice poem..Popo and Virdi...Claps!

Sayesha said...

#Vikram H,
Wow, that's a very interesting and disturbing thought... :O

#Fao,
Virdi's your angel??? Why does he play devil here then??

#Viks,
I'm sure I'm sure! Tujhe hi dekhti rehti hain! ;)

#Jade,
Thanks! :)

#Jay,
Hahaha! That was hilarious! :D

#Mr Yogi,
Thanks! :)

#Leon,
CHEERS!!! :)

#Sahil,
Towel-clad angel??!! Wow, someone has wild fantasies, huh? ;)

#ROS,
Thanks, baby! :)

Rays Of Sun said...

So should we rechristen Virdi now?

Rays Of Sun said...

Jay,

I think, the lines you mentioned apply to the age and the time of our life..You believe in Santa when you are a child, When you have grown up, you dont believe in Santa, When you are married-You act like Santa and when you grow old-you look like him:)

Not sure, but I think its this way!

Anonymous said...

ummm not sure @rays_of_sun but did that really deserve explaining? LOL...eep!

Tinku

Sayesha said...

#ROS,
Virdi has already been rechristened. Read the thread of emails! ;)

ps: Geez, joke ko explain karna zaroori tha? Mere haathon pitegi tu! :P

pps: By the way, I think rather than your "When you are married-You act like Santa", "When you have kids, you are Santa" is more apt.

ppps: Gosh, I can't believe we're even analysing this! Yeh joke puri tarah barbaad ho gaya! This can never be used in the world anymore! :O

#Tinku,
Hehehehe... I already sunaoed ROS for it. Mujhe toh maaf kar degi kyunki I'm her baby, but tera kya hoga Kalia? Muahaha! :D

Anonymous said...

Hehehe! Mujhko bhi maaf kar degi. Jyada se jyada tevar dikhayegi thode. Aur ye jo tu usko uksane ki koshish kar rahi hai na mujhe "tera kya hoga Kalia" bol ke...iss plan mein dumm nahin hai! *wistle* *wistle*

waise mast wat lagayi usne joke ki! =))

Tinku

Sayesha said...

#Tinku,
Hahahahaha! :D

//Aur ye jo tu usko uksane ki koshish kar rahi hai na

Hehehe... you saw right thru that, huh? Kya karein yaar... gotta take the heat off myself man... uska gussa kahin toh redirect karna tha! :P

//waise mast wat lagayi usne joke ki!

Yep! Like I said before, this joke has officially become unusable! :D

Rays Of Sun said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Rays Of Sun said...

E tinku,
Tune mera gussa nahi dekha aaj tak..delh I am fuming right now..
Aur kya re Sash, mein kya terepe gussa nahi kar saktee??? I am out of here..mein itna kisika nahi suntee...apne boss ka bhi nahi:(((((
Go enjoy the jokes, me said ki I was not sure of it..
ja ja mujhe miss karegee..
fir enjoy the convo with Tinku:(

Anonymous said...

//Tune mera gussa nahi dekha aaj tak..delh I am fuming right now..

@rays_of_sun - Aaj dekh liya!aur meri rooh kaamp gayi hai! Aaj ke baad dhyaan rakhoonga! :(

waise sayesha bahut heroin ban rahi thi ki usko koi kuch nahin kahega! =))

Tinku

shub said...

lol @ sounding like Joey!! I rmbr that episode!!! :D
and I was on orchard last week for a bit, and mercifully nothing I saw really pained me that much. Walked straight into takashimaya, clicked some pice of the HUGE tree and got out! :)

Rays Of Sun said...

Tinku, tu chillax..tu new entry hai..for me,tujhe mein jantee nahi hoon na...
Sash ne mujhe bada faada:(

Sayesha said...

#ROS,
Ay, idhar zyada nautanki mat kar! Mere saare naye readers ko bhaga degi tu! :D

#Tinku,
Arre iski baaton mein mat aa... roz ka yehi locha hai... drama queen!

//waise sayesha bahut heroin ban rahi thi

Hehehe... apne blog par toh kutta bhi sher hota hai! ;)

#Shub,
You should look around a bit more... and you will see why the decorations are so gaudy, they don't give you the Christmassy feeling of loving... and giving... and sharing... and receiving...! Haha! Joey rocks! ;)

#ROS,
Ab bas kar! Bahut ho gaya! Nayi entry se aise pesh aate hain??

Anonymous said...

haan...sash ne teri bahut wat lagayi! uske sath bhi to ho gaya tha ek din. Usko maine sardarjee wala joke sunaya..

-------------------

Banta singh: Will you marry me?

Manpreet Kaur: But I am one year older than you.

Banta Singh: No problem, I will marry you next year.

----------------

Sayesha was like ... "lekin Manpreet ki age bhi to ek saal jyada ho jayegi ek saal baad! they will grow by same number of days".She was giving detailed explaination as to what was wrong there. Apni baari mein bhool jati hai lekin doosron ki wat lagane ka koi mauka nahin jane deti!!! Galat baat hai! Thodi aur wat lagao sayesha ki! :))

//tu new entry hai..for me,tujhe mein jantee nahi hoon na...

btw Ive been to your blog a few times and liked it too. I liked that GFs better than BFs post. :)

Tinku

Anonymous said...

sayesha tu exactly uss hi time pe kyun post marti hai jiss time pe main marta hoon...munnu ke blog pe bhi aisa hi kiya tune!

Tinku

Rays Of Sun said...

Sash,
Sorry. Wont repeat it.

Sayesha said...

#Tinku,
Wah re, apun ko involve karke achha khasa story bhi likh dala, aur apun ko maloom hi nahin ki yeh hua kab?? Shaabaash mere sher! Bahut tarakki karega! :)

//sayesha tu exactly uss hi time pe kyun post marti hai jiss time pe main marta hoon

Arre ab tu commenting ka time slot bhi book karega?

#ROS,
//Sorry. Wont repeat it.

Offo! Ab yeh senti ho gayi!

Maaf kar meri ma, aage se I won't joke around with you. Khush?

Arre mera khud kitna sabo hota hai mere hi blog par! Khair, jaane de... tu aise senti ho jaayegi, yeh nahin pata tha... I am sorry. Aage se I will think before I say anything to you.

And I thought it was all in good humour...

Anonymous said...

>> You could have a Christian
>> wedding after your usual one! >> What's stopping you?

no money ... no honey ... no got fun like bunny ...

:)

virdi said...

this msg is for Sayesha and ROS...

I know Mota Wakeel... brother of Chota Shakeel... tum dono ka time khalas ho gaya i belive... Tapka dega woh tum dono ko...

Thhhrrrrrrbbbbbbrrrrrrtttt!!!

Rays Of Sun said...

Hahhahah. chup re meree MA, and I thought you knew me and my stupid gussa, and you very well know, I CANT SULK..:)
Mujhse dosti karegee?:)

BTW, mera post padh, fir tujhe samjhega why I wrote what I wrote, sweety:)
Aur Popo, hum lawyer ke bina sulaah karte hain..no scope for anyone else between Sash and ROS:)

Both are smart young ladies:)
Chlo email pe milo..was busy, so could not reply
Aur sayesha ki bacchi..mujhse naraaz na hona:p

Rays Of Sun said...

CHal reply to me fast, naheeto your phone will start ringing in another half hour. I know how to clean up the mess, sweetie:)

Rays Of Sun said...

Dekh tera no of comments 100 tak leke aaongee:)) In short, spam your blog:p

virdi said...

Popo hogi tu....... Thrrrbbbbrttttt!!! dekh loonga ek ek ko.. sab ko dekh loonga...

strike... chakka jaam...

Rays Of Sun said...

Virdi,

Hum yaheen hai, dekh lo..Popo:))Dekh tera "woh"wala nick name sabke saamne bolne pe majboor mat kar:p
Popo hi theek hai..Thrbbbbtttt

Anonymous said...

Hahaaha....Popo, how CUTE :-)

deepahnika said...

Hi Sayesha, this is my first visit to your blog..ur posts are real good :)..I believe in angels ..i hope u do too sooon :)..tk care

Sayesha said...

#Kais,
Hahaha! Hope you get all three soon! :)

#Popo,
Thhhrrrrbbbbrrrrtttttttt back to you! :P

#ROS,
Ja ja maaf kiya... :P
ps: The voice message you left on my mobile was soooo funny! Should I upload it? Hahahah! Naa re, kidding! :D
pps: And don't you dare threaten to fao my blog! :O

#Popo,
Dekh le! Thhhrrrbrrrttt! :P

#Harshi,
Welcome to Popo's partyyy! Behti ganga mein haath dho le tu bhi! :D

#Deepahnika,
Welcome to Sayeshaz and thanks! And that's a real unique name/nick you have! :)

Rays Of Sun said...

Hahahah, sure upload kar..Mein bhi apna awaaz sunegee:)
But, is it possible to do that? Naheeto apnee Popo party pe bhej de:)) Even, I don't remember what I bakofied on there:))

Sayesha said...

#ROS,
Hahahaha! Naah, I want it all to myself! :D