Tuesday, November 22, 2005

From bloggers-not-so-anonymous to MACs

Dammit. Today I wanted to blog about the very interesting case of the missing intern, but looking at the hoo-haa on Munnu's blog, I feel that this post is more called for. So at the risk of inviting more unwanted MACs to Sayeshaz, here's what I have to say.

-------------------------------------------------------

Dear Mean Anonymous Commentator (MAC),

Thank you for anonymously subscribing to our newsletter. Welcome to your third consecutive year in Commenting 101. We hope you will enjoy these lessons as much as we at bloggers-not-so-anonymous have enjoyed putting them together for you. And we hope you will finally graduate this year.

Before we proceed to delve deep into the subject, let us give you a refresher course on blogs, since you seem to forget it every now and then.

1. A blog is a web log. It belongs to an individual. It does not belong to you. Is that clear? Underline that. It does not belong to you.

2. If point 1 is clear, you would realise that since it does not belong to you, it belongs to someone else. Someone else, okay? Now that's a whole other person. And no, it's not you.

3. Since the blog belongs to a whole other person, that whole other person has the right to write whatever he/she wants to write on his/her blog. We know we keep harping on this, but we have to, because some of our more intellectually challenged students just don't seem to get it. If you're so keen on dictating content on a blog, get one yourself. It's easy. And free. (unlike these very expensive lessons you're having to attend).

4. We bloggers do not ask for praise. Neither do we ask you to agree with us on every point. We write because we want to write. Hell, half the time we write nonsense. And we know it. But a blog is for our thoughts. If there is nonsense in our thoughts, there will be nonsense in the blog. You cannot control it. We repeat, you cannot control our thoughts. (Hell, even we can't!)

5. You're not tied to a chair with your eyelids pinned open and the blog in front of you. You have the choice to close your eyes. You have the choice to close the window. You have the choice to shut down the computer. You have the choice to run away from the 'evil blog that insults your intelligence'.

6. Be clear about what constructive criticism is. What you are doing, is not. There are plenty of intelligent commentators here who give us constructive criticism. Learn from them.

7. Before you judge us, look at yourself. We bloggers are mere mortals with all our flaws. And we display them on our blogs. Not for you to take the high-horse attitude. If you are so perfect yourself, why don't you spread some love around, instead of spreading malice and possibly ruining someone's day? Most of us bloggers don't care about your comments, but some do, and the rest of us will stand up for those. Bloggers are people too. Treat them as you would treat people whom you talk to in person. The mask of anonymity does not give you special meanness privileges.

8. You are not forking out your hard-earned money to read anyone's blog. It's purely your own choice. So do not complain about QC.

9. We bloggers are open to criticism and disagreement, but only if it is mature and leads to an intelligent debate. Statements like "What crap!" or "You write nonsense." or "You're so pathetic." are of no use to either you or us. It may boost your ego for a while, but think of how pathetic you are if your ego is boosted by thoughts of how pathetic you think we are.

10. Think about your comment after you comment. Remember, everyone makes mistakes. Just that blogger gives you the option of going back and deleting your mistakes. Use it. Be a good guest. Don't let your host clean up after you.

11. Why do you post as anonymous? What are you scared of? Most MACs have blog accounts. Use it. Sign in and then post. Let us see you just as you see us.

12. If you do not have a blog account, get one and walk a mile in our shoes. Think of how sad it is that you are criticising someone's online thoughts, when you don't have any yourself.

13. Trust us when we say that none of us bloggers wants to block anonymous comments, many of which are incredibly insightful. Some of them are our friends and we respect their right to not have a blog in order to comment on our blogs. Just as we have the right to put ourselves on blogger, they have the right not to.
So do not let your deeds give a bad name to all non-bloggers.

14. Face it. Most of the time you post mean anonymous comments due to a personal grudge. The same post by a friend of yours triggers a "Haha, you're crazy, man!" comment from you, but if someone you dislike writes it, your comment magically transforms to "How much crap do you write? I'm disgusted at your blog." Personal grudges are not good for your well-being. Get rid of them. (This, coming from us, who don't even care so much about your well-being!)

15. Do not make it your duty to do internet policing and criticising content on the net that is not upto your 'high' standards. Think about how much value your juvenile comments are adding to the 'high-standard' stuff.

That's all for the day. Because we fear it may be too much knowledge for you to digest. We hope this lesson has been enlightening for you in some way.

We know you may not change your ways just by reading this.

But maybe you will. Who knows.

Yours truly,

Sayesha
On behalf of
Bloggers-not-so-anonymous



47 comments:

Humjoli said...

may i have the honour to say that i am first today?

will read the post later tonight and will surely comment! :P

Malika said...

Ha!Sayesha so well written..Oh I dont have a blog yet,may be I should work on it.However I so agree with all that you have written.I have so many friends who have actually itroduced me to the world of blogging.They call it their personal diary for the world to see.And really such comments make you think..who even asked you to get here,and for you to have actually read the entire blog and then comment on it,speaks for itself.I admire your ability to slice people without letting them they know you have actually made mince out of them.Anyways hope you have a good day.Cheers Malika

Ravi said...

Hahaha

I remember you were talking once about commenting rules, but I didn't know it would come out like this. It was so funny.

I read munnu's post as well. Today was one funny day. :D

But on a serious note, stuff like this will keep hapenning. It is for us to understand MAC's existance & not take their comments to heart.

Sahil said...

Hey great post!! I really enjoyed reading it - sensed some of that 'bad-ass Sayesha' I love so much. ;)

You pretty much covered everything that needed to be said in your lesson, and expressed with such clarity.

Subhan-Allah!

I particularly liked this bit:


5. You're not tied to a chair with your eyelids pinned open and the blog in front of you. You have the choice to close your eyes. You have the choice to close the window. You have the choice to shut down the computer. You have the choice to run away from the 'evil blog that insults your intelligence'.


Made me laugh out loud - very visual picture you painted. Like someone is being tortured to read blogs. Nahin, no more, no more, I can't read anymoreeeee!

spamtaneous said...

5th... will come back and comment later!

Clueless said...

Word. Word. Word a million times over.

You kick ass girl...and I love it!!!

Brilliant. Just bloody perfectly brilliant. I bet whoever u addressed this to is sitting somewhere cowering like a pathetic loser.

Perfect.

munnu said...

WOW.Now this is going to be a point on my little and barren resume - Wrote some crap which led to a great and comprehensive follow up post on the blogger's fav - sayesha.blogspot.com.

Thank you for saying a word to these guys sayesha.No one kills em like you do.:).

seriously , these MACs would be yelling 'bhaago saayesha aayi' in some time.but cool down now , after all it all adds another shade to the color of blogging.

Aethyr said...

phew!! thank god i have a blogger identity otherwise i would have lost in another identity crisis...and bashed....saved just in time..

Clueless said...

sorry to double post..but this caught my eye..

//Like someone is being tortured to read blogs. Nahin, no more, no more, I can't read anymoreeeee!

i almost fell off my chair reading that. Now i have images of old hindi movie torture scenes running through my head. Thanks, dude! ;)

!xobile said...

mast bola sayesha
mast bola

yeh saale anpad hote hain!

but yaar... the name 'mac', i use it to refer to VERY good friends of mine!
chop kar dee naam kee!

Rohit Talwar said...

i loved every line of your post.

and i agree to every point. these guys can be so irritating. seems they dont want to know what others think, they dont want to explore other's thoughts, but just let them down and discourage them. but heyo.. they can't. they end up irritating us. damn. may be they want to irritate us...get a life guys!

take care.

Sayesha said...

#Humjoli,
Kya yaar, this trend seems to be catching on! Sab medal le lekar chale jaate hain, blog koi nahin padhta :(

#Malika,
Thanks, girl! :)

#Ravi,
Thanks! :)
You're right, we have to accept MACs and not take their comments to heart, but the world would be so much more nicer if the MACs thought before they posted, hai na? :)

#Sahil,
Yeah, the bad-ass Sayesha you love so much surfaces now and then :)
Thanks! :)

#Spammy,
Et tu, Spammus? Nahiiinnnn!!!!!

#Anusha,
Thanks, babe! Good luck with those exams! :)

#Munnu,
Sayesha's gotta do what she's gotta do yaar. Bahut ho gaya tha, ek tutorial zaroori ho gaya tha yaar.
ps: Yeah, it does add another shade to the colour of blogging, but I am not a big fan of the negative energy it generates around our blogs.

#Aethyr,
Arre I have nothing against non-bloggers! So many regulars here are non-bloggers! :)
I only have things against thoughtless nonsensical statements that are more personal attacks than comments.

#Anusha,
I know! I was laughing so hard imagining MacMohan (remember that old time villain?) tied to a chair, going, "Nahin, ab mujhse aur nahin padha jaayega. Sayesha, main tere pair padta hoon, apne blog ka window band kar de, tu jo kahegi main woh karunga!" :D

#Ze,
Thanks! :)
Arre yaar I coined the term 'MAC' loooong ago, now it's stuck! :)

#Rohit,
I agree, I wanna ignore them but at the same time I wanna help them with whatever is messing things up in their heads...

Keshav said...

lol !! (read as 101 also) was very informative :).

You're not tied to a chair with your eyelids pinned open and the blog in front of you. You have the choice to close your eyes.

You know there is one movie where a guy is made to do just that...watch movies continuously..he is tied to a chair...with eyelids pinned open..while a doctor is standing by and treating him with eye drops every few seconds....that was a punishment for him.

Rays Of Sun said...

Hey Sash!

Loved the post, baby:)
Esp this one:"You're not tied to a chair with your eyelids pinned open and the blog in front of you. You have the choice to close your eyes. You have the choice to close the window. You have the choice to shut down the computer. You have the choice to run away from the 'evil blog that insults your intelligence'"

Truly vivid imagination and great wordings.
I hate it when people post as anonymous and find out typos in your blog..considering that it was an accidental manual error..

Cherubin said...

lol....I almost laughed as much as I laugh while reading munnu bhaiya's post :) Way to go girl!!!

PS: How come there aren't any MACs here yet????

Harshi said...

>>>Be a good guest. Don't let your host clean up after you.

Absolutely loved that.

Sayesha, I hope your message gets through some of these people.

yossarian said...

haha awesome post....kahna padega yeh walli abhi ki post se bhi zyada funny thi....
munnu bhai... competition aa gaya

vibha said...

hey really a good post. i liked these lines esp
"You are not forking out your hard-earned money to read anyone's blog. It's purely your own choice. So do not complain about QC."
GREAT...

ankur said...

sorry...a totally different take on this.

- more often than not...you learn most from people you dont know...cause the people whom you do know are always busy saying things you already know.

- 'meanness' is the only way you will admire and respect 'niceness'...you can never drive it away...so dont even attempt...

- it doesnt really harm you to hear from MACs...afterall...all that you had to say about them applies to you too wrt their comments...jst shut your eyes..! there is a whole world that loves u...

but then..as u rightly said...u r free to stand by your opinion...

respected...!

~a

Anonymous said...

Wow! 4th comment in 2 days. This is a new record for me. See Ms. Sayesha, I have no time for blogging. I am a very busy person, though I follow a couple of blogs. Came to this blog just by coincidence (and because I am on break and have lot of time on hand), only to find a valuable lesson *sarcastic smile*.
Here are a couple of doubts teacher.. if you care to answer.
1) I am no moral police. But is it moral to accuse and make fun of other fellow blogger/commenter if you are doing something similar, in a less apparent way?
2) Just because I don't have a blogger ID (and I am not going to create one so that I can show a petty blogger his place) does my pointing out the obvious becomes taboo?
3) Is it mature to make illogical inconsequential statements like "you don't pay..", "we don't force you to read...", etc. over and over again? (Seen closely, your first 6-7 points are redundant) Give me a break. I know that already. Tell me something new.
4) "What crap!" or "You write nonsense." or "You're so pathetic." Never was this said or implied in my comments. You should be taking reading lessons before giving writing lessons. I just pointed out that while Munnu (as he is called) is pointing and making fun of someone, he is not far from being categorized with them.
5) My thoughts are not put on a website or weblog. They are put in a software. Heard of "Yahoo! messenger"? Yeah I have put a lot of thoughts in various modules.
6) My name is Earl. Does that make any sense to you? I am Jackie Lee. Now? See, I do not know Munnu or you personally. So there is no point of using proper nouns.

Pradyot said...

Oh and though you fail to point out what was wrong with my comment, it was just an innocent point-of-fact without personal grudge, you two can pat your backs (Munnu and you).

Munnu: Yay! Sayesha... you kick ass. Though you just repeated same thing over and over, wasting lot of space and time. And didn't prove a point. But we are the bloggers, we can say anything on these pages. *High five*
Sayesha: Yes Munnu. Though you poke fun at people for being so desperate, you fail to see how you are one of them. But since you write post of 500 words with meaning worth 2 words, I love your blog. *Return high five*

Me: Wow! These people know how to scratch each other in small of back. Praise the lord who made these bloggers. I am now a total fan of Maddox, who pointed out flaws with blogs and bloggers ages ago. I should have listened to him.

And the world goes on...

Rays Of Sun said...

Man! am I getting lost?? Well, why introduce big terms such as moral police?? Why make a big hype over such terms..If you read it..read it, if-not move on! Why ridicule someone who has written something thats totally his point of view??

Sayesha, writes posts through her experiences, of what her understanding is of the situation. She does not need anyone to reassure her and her writing.

Anon, you say the points were redundant rite?? Well, funny that you actually read those over and over again:D. If they indeed sound that way, you should have stopped reading it at the second point itself.
Think about it, you actually chalked out 6-7 points yourself..Wow! and you are busy?

P.S.Sash, I am sorry for taking the liberty of commenting on someone over here. But, I believe in standing up for my friends, especially when someone is lashing out on her, for no apparent reason.

Sayesha said...

#Keshav,
Thanks! :)
I should have known you'd come up with a movie like that! :P

#ROS,
Thanks, gilr! :)
Yeah, the typo ones are really silly. It's like "I find nothing in this post but a typo." :D

#Angel,
Thanks!
//How come there aren't any MACs here yet????

Aayenge, aayenge, waqt aane de Angel, junta lekar aayenge! :)

#Harshi,
Thanks! :) I hope so too! :)

#Yossarian,
Thanks! :) Naah, Abhi ka department alag hai, no competition here :)

#Vibha,
Thanks! :)

#Ankur,
I agree that we learn more from people I don't know. But how much do you think I can learn from a statement like "Sayesha your blog sucks."?

Well, sometimes it does hurt to hear from MACs. And I only write about them when the cup spilleth over with their meanness.

#Anonymous,
Wow, you're here! Welcome! :) Teacher will answer all your doubts.
1. Dude, the MACs started the fight. We were happily blogging away, and bam! suddenly they were there! Gotta protect our territory, brother!
2. The problem is that you DO have a blogger ID (read the comment after yours). So why is it that you would not say your exact words as yourself, but have to hide behind anonymity? What are you afraid of?
3. I have to slam my "redundant points" again and again (and again!) because the MACs don't seem to get it. And as a good "teacher" I gotta repeat till they get it you see.
4. Oh sweetheart, don't flatter yourself too much. This post, as it obvious from its title, is not just addressed to you, but to the entire brotherhood of MACs. And if you just want to point out facts, show yourself so at least there is some credibility to your words.
5. Isn't this great? You hide your thoughts in yahoo messenger and walk around blogs criticising others'? Wow. Amazing.
6. Earl/Jackie, it's all about respect. If you gave us a name, even if it is Earl or Jackie Lee, we'd at least respect you.

#Pradyot,
Wow. I admire you for coming out in the open. Of course, I do hope it was intentional. Now that I know that it was Pradyot, at least I will read your comment with much more respect. You see what I mean?

Munnu and I are wasting our own time and space, my dear. Who's asking you to waste yours reading, commenting and then defending? I am sure a busy person like you has so much more high-quality content to read on the net than our '500 words with meaning worth 2 words' posts.

And yeah, it hurts to see Munnu and I do a high-five, eh?

*Sayesha and Munnu do yet another high-five*

May you and Maddox have a great life together. Hope he doesn't wait for you to sleep so he can quietly get up and read blogs.

#ROS,
Thanks for standing up for us. I agree with every one of your points.

I just wish some people understood that just as they treat people in person, they should do that on blogsphere too. The mask of anonymity does not give anyone the right to be mean to other people.

Rays Of Sun said...

WHAT..If I read it correctly, did Pradyot post that Anonymous comment??? I did not read his comment previously, but somehow can't really believe it was him.
I think I am again lost:(
Though, I still stand up for what I said:D

Vikram said...

Who is Munnu? What is going on? I have never been so confused.

MAC? Cheesy acronym. Hahaha! (no offence ok?)

Sayesha said...

#ROS,
From the looks of it, I guess it was Pradyot. But I feel so much less hostile now that I know it was him! People should really post as themselves, makes so much of a difference na! :)

#Vikram,
Arre yar follow the story na... read up a bit, tab pata chalega chakkar kya hai :)
ps: I know it's damn cheesy yaar! :P

. : A : . said...

Great post Sayesha. Love the tone in which you wrote it.

:-)

Rays Of Sun said...

Hey Sash,

Naah..I dont think its Pradyot..

Reasons: If I re-read Anon's comments..
I am a very busy person,though I follow a couple of blogs --I think Prad's follows lots of blog.See his blog-rolling.

Came to this blog just by coincidence (and because I am on break and have lot of time on hand), only to find a valuable lesson--I think Prad's been on your blog for a long time now and has posted good comments as well. And I dont think he has a lot of vella time..

Anyhow, Hope Prad solves this confusion:(

Tinku said...

Bhai saab yahan to dange fasad ho gaye!!!

Itna fundoo type naam kyun diya anonymous logon ko? Mac sounds too groovy for them...Hey Mac, Yo Mac! Like some studs on Harley Davidson cruising around the blogosphere with everyone looking at them in awe! :))

Tinku

Drops Of Jupiter said...

But you see,you get a average of 50-100 comments on every post. That is a buttload!
Given that the audience reading is >= audience commenting, surely you expect some people to disagree right?

Distasteful comments--Not excusable, but genuine disagreement or harmless ribbing? (Of course, on text, its hard to tell the real tone of the comment, whether it is bitchy,naughty or perverted)
If people disagree and they bother to tell you they do, that says a lot. Don't you think?

Munnu said...

Man , chill out now.

Ok pradyot ( if u r the guy who left that 'drippin with insightful' comment )--

See, I am the sort of guy with the perfectly "chalta hai" indian attitude , so in case your ego blows up to the size of a dinosaur by proving your point , I accept whatever you say.You win man.main ho gaya clean bowled , tune sixer maara , tu jeet gaya mere bhai , bass main hee haara.Ok , I hopw u r feeling like high fiving yourself now .Please do that and enjoy life from now on , infact you deserve a certificate or something , but too bad I still dnt give out any of those.

So now chill out , if you think I am what I am , so be it.but let peace return to sayeshaz , you see , you may be right , but you are surely not making anybody smile.PLZ DNT REPLY.mail me if you want to.

@sayesha - chill down now yar.I am sorry ur blog is going through this coz of what I wrote.apne MISSING INTERN wala post maar na.

Sayesha said...

#. : A : .,
Thanks! :)

#ROS,
Well, Pradyot mentioned that Munnu and I failed to mention what was wrong with his comment. And there's no other comment by him that's related to this issue. So unless Pradyot turns up and tells us the real deal, looks like it was him.

#Tinku,
Hahahahaha! Great visual man... MACs on their Harley Davidsons and us bloggers running for cover, eh? Naah, we'll put up a fight even from our rickshaws (think Main Hoon Na!) ;)

#Jups,
I totally agree with you about the disagreeing. And I am completely open to disagreements that lead to something positive or constructive. Harmless ribbing is also fine, almost welcome at times! ;) But a statement like "Sayesha/Munnu, your blog sucks" or "Sayesha/Munnu, how much crap can you write?" is not going to be of any use to us or the commentator. We won't shut down our blogs because of that.

This post was never about disagreements. This was about distasteful mean comments that serve no purpose other than spreading bad blood.

#Abhi,
Don't worry about danga fasaad at Sayeshaz yaar... yeh toh roz ki kahani hai :) Besides, I jumped into the thing of my own accord. So don't apologise or take your words back just to create peace here. Peace apne aap ho jaayega dekhna :) MACs and Sayeshaz have a love-hate relationship you see. We'll be back together in no time! :)

Tinku said...

Ye Pradjyot wala kya scene hai? Why did this guy make a nasty comment as anonymous and then reveal his identity? Itna pareshaan kyun hai ye insaan?

Koi naraaz Sunny Deol lagta hai. Society ka sataya hua. " Aaj hi maar dalunga sabko..aaj hi..judge saab aapko bhi nahin chodunga!"

Priy mitr aapse milkar bahut khushi hui, meri aankhein bhar aayi hain aap se milkar! :(

Tinku

Tinku said...

//Naah, we'll put up a fight even from our rickshaws (think Main Hoon Na!)

hahaha! That scene was like Neo of Matrix on a Rikshaw. Mast scene tha! :p

Tinku

Eleventy Seven said...

A war against the bunch of anon. commentors!

Boy! nice battle on your hand.

Nice blog too :-)

ritzkini said...

hmm..point made...hope,point taken..

virdi said...

hmmm... dekh loonga... ek ek ko dekh loonga... samajh ke kya rakha hai?? meri pahunch uupar tak hai... parliament mein mudda uthega... sab ka band baja dunga...

band bajega??? oye balle bale oye balle balle!!!

aMyth! said...

yai! way to go... sayesha.
i'll store a link to this post..somewhere safe.. never know when i may need those words.. ;)

Pradyot said...

I came with the name, just so that you don't think the person in question doesn't have a blog or the ettiquites. All I was saying is an age old fact that when you point a finger at someone, three point back at you. But seems like bloggers attach less value to the content of the comment abd more to the author of comment.
Anyways, my comments were mutilated while quoting, for I never said/implied that what munnu or you write crap. (If that had been my opinion I would have not read in first place.) In fact I was impersonated once. All in all, a lot bigger issue was created out of a single commment. I neither have the energy or intent to keep this going. So, from my side... chapter closed.

Raj said...

Sometimes funny, sometimes serious.
A great post. At least it served its purpose and you got your anon commentor to stop commenting as anon.

Good job!

Sayesha said...

#Tinku,
Hahahaha! You're so funny! :D
ps: The rickshaw scene was too much man!

#Saurabh,
Thanks! :)

#Ritzkini,
I hope so too.

#Virdi,
Aaiye aaiye aapki hi kami thi bas!

#aMyth!,
Thanks man! :)

#Pradyot,
Didn't you say that you don't have a blog id? Or was that your impersonator? Anyway, whatever it is, I am glad you came out in the open. And I'd like to reiterate the point that this post was not addressed to you only, but to millions of MACs out there who do not know the difference between constructive criticism/disagreement and just being plain mean for no apparent reason.

Yes, I agree. Let's close this chapter and start afresh.

Hi, I'm Sayesha. Blogger. Mujhse dosti karoge? :)

#Raj,
Thanks! :)

Dreamcatcher said...

This was a great post Sayesha and so necessary. I stooped anonymous comments on my blog beacuse some smartass moron got so abusive.

Sayesha said...

#Dreamcatcher,
Thanks! :)

Pradyot said...

Sure :)

Sayesha said...

#Pradyot,
Great! We start on a clean slate then! Welcome to Sayeshaz! :)

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