Thursday, August 17, 2006

At last shrugged

They say he is larger than life.

Well, I'm not a fan so I dunno about that. But he surely is heavier than life.

Yesterday I lugged Amitabh Bachchan across the country. Back and forth.

My dissertation supervisor had lent me this book on Bollywood superstar Amitabh Bachchan titled 'To be or not to be', so I could check if I could use anything from it in my dissertation. The book, compiled by legendary film critic Khalid Mohamed, was written as a gift from Jaya Bachchan to Amitabh Bachchan for his 60th birthday.

Needless to say, Khalid Mohamed received ample help from the entire Bachchan clan in terms of photos and anecdotes from the ye olde days. A little too much help I think. The 424-page book measures 11 x 14 inches, and weighs more than 3 kgs!

So when my supervisor told me on Tuesday that he wanted it back (along with other books he'd lent me) on Wednesday, I had no choice but to carry the load from my house in Clementi through 15 train stations to my office in Paya Lebar and then from Paya Lebar through 19 train stations all the way to NTU in the evening!


I could barely feel my arms when I finally put the bag of books down on the floor outside his office. And then I saw the shocking sight in front of me. The lights in his room were off -- he was not in. Usually the professors leave around 5:30 to 6 pm, and the general office also closes around that time. He'd told me he'd be in to take the books back from me.
But he wasn't.

As Amitabh Bachchan gave me a sarcastic smile from the book cover,
I wanted to collapse on the floor screaming "Nahinnnnn yeh nahinnnn ho saktaaaaa!" The mere thought of having to lug it back to Clementi and then to Paya Lebar the next day and then to NTU again was making me go weak in the knees.

I had a class in 15 minutes. I had to get rid of it then itself. Somehow. But how???
I looked around wildly and noticed that one of the rooms in the corridor had lights on. I read the name on the door and it was a professor I did not know. Yet, I gathered courage and knocked. As soon as the owner of that room had opened the door, the words just came tumbling out of my mouth. "Dr Foo, could I please ask you for a favour? My supervisor lent me this book and I was supposed to return it to him today and I think he's forgotten about the meeting and I can't get through to him and I have to go for a class now and the book is really heavy and I can't carry it back and take it to work tomorrow and bring it to NTU again and..." I was breathless.

I think the sheer number of 'ands' in my sentence combined with my pitiable face moved him to the core. He smiled, as all angels do before they grant you your wish and said the words that were honey to my ears, "Sure, you can leave the book here. Just let him know that I have it."


I felt like a murderer who had just managed to discreetly dispose off the dead body. Laash ko thikaane laga diya muahaha! :D

After thanking him profusely, I scurried off for my class, with only one thought in mind.

Khalid Mohamed, I don't like you. :|


sneha said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...


sneha said...

oww!! 3 kgs! must be some rock! but, can't blame the author for it.. bachchan is quite a man(n we share our bday too.. *blush blush*) must've had volumes to write about(and did too) lol..

ps. i deleted the first comment because i noticed a typo.. hehe..

sunshine said...

he he, imagine jaya aunty's plight (as some people call her, courtesy:munnu's blog) the last couple of years, and it was just a book sayesha, waise who am i giving gyaan to? I myself tried lifting that book and soon enuf i realised it'd make me great muscles, though no idea how good a read it would make.

sunshine said...

4 comments in 2 minutes? Whoever said you could just make maggi in 2 minutes.. he he.

Anonymous said...

Nice Title to an otherwise ordinary blog ;-) u have raised my bar of xpectations about u'r bar u see...

The Pirate said...

Why does 424 page page has to be 3 Kgs? r they nuts?? .. ;)

The Pirate said...

oh well, i meant 424 page book*... ;)

The Pirate said...

and answering ur question... i'm one of your big fans.. ;)).. LOL

*i see rising curosity has gone beyond the height of moon*... he he

Anonymous said...

Ohh!! Only if all the lights were off.., we cud have had a bigger post!

/As Amitabh Bachchan gave me a sarcastic smile from the book cover,/


Inder said...

the big b... no wonder the book on him is big and heavy. is a 11X14 inchs book of 3 kgs that difficult to carry around?? :)

neihal said... have a valid reason not to like Khalid Mohd :-)

Sakshi said...

LOL.. one more reasn to dislike KM..

shub said...

Foo what? hehe I had a prof called Foo Say Wei...jus checkin if it was him :) mighty nice chap!

Adarsh said...

arrey....AMITABH BACCHAN hai bhai....
itna WEIGHT to maangta hai .... bole to ... itna to dikhanaich hota hai ;)
sahi bol raela na apun....

Janefield said...

The Big B ROCKS! And apparently, is also a rock :D

rt said...

hey even though the book is heavy.. there are some real cool pics of amitabh...
and u did ofcourse now know he is lighter if not smaller than life ;)

Clueless said...

I know how it feels to lug a heavy book around town, believe me. Each of my textbooks weighs a ton. Imagine carrying around 10 of them back to campus after the holidays. Ack! Bad memories. *shudder*

And has Jaya Bachchan ever heard of a watch or a nice shirt? You know, nice birthday presents? Book, it seems. Mad woman. *shakes head*

And yeah, boo to Khalid Mohamed. And all the writers of all my textbooks. *sticks tongue out*

Yes, I feel 12 years old today. Why do you ask? ;)

Vikram H said...

lol....sometimes these celebrities talk a lot about themselves, a lot more than they'd have to! they way, im sure the whole jaya gifting the book to Amitabh was all a public stunt meant to attract more publicity to the book!

There wouldnt have been a person other than Amitabh who would have been more interested in releasing this book!

...By the way, I'm back!!

The Lonely Traveller said...

Pata nahi is book mein itna kya hai? I'm sure that it's more like a coffee table book, with loads of pictures.
3 kgs OMG!!!
But anyways, after watching Amitabh's "Sexy Sam" kirdaar in "Kabhi Alvida na Kehna", I am somehow put off by the sight of him.
So this book is a no - no for me. At least for the time.

Shake it to the left..then shake it to the right...
Shake your behind and give all a FRIGHT..
Isn't this as cheesy as
"Sexy Sam! sexy Sam! Wham bam..Thank you Sam."?
Wow! I can be a lyricist too...
he he he

PSV said...

Awesome post girl.....simply awesome
One of the best post that you have written.
Keep Blogging!

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

lol @ the title. p(h)unny it is.

Sayesha said...

Deleted? :O

Thhrrbbrrrtt! Anonymous pple get only scrap metal! :D

//must've had volumes to write about(and did too) lol..

Sheesh! I hope there is no Vol II to the book! Imagine poor chaps who receive complimentary copies?? (like my supervisor) :O

Haha! Yeah I think I started developing biceps already with one encounter! :P

Thanks, but try not to have "expectations" of this bar. Because sometimes they will be met and sometimes they won't be. The bar owner does not have a QC department you see, and she doesn't care :)

I guess they are! The pages are super thick! :O

//*i see rising curosity has gone beyond the height of moon*

Sheesh! So you won't tell me? :(

Thanks! :)
ps: I don't get your lights off bit, sorry, it's 6:45 am, too early for my brain to process this kinda stuff! :P

Arre try walking with it, taking a bus with it, taking a train with it all over Singapore, then you'll know! :O

Yeah! :/

Whoa, yours and Neihal's comments are so similar! :O But I think you LOL-ed louder? :P

Naah, not him. This one's from the school of Comms.

Weight hone ka mangta hai, lekin mere naazuk kandhon par kyuuunnnn? :'(

#Chosen One,
Oh! A fan, are ya? :P
Yes yes, rock is the word! :O

Yeah, some pics are the never-seen-before kinds... but did not make a fan outta me yet. :)

I can totally understand your situation baby. I have still not been able to get rid of my Microelectronics book! :O

//And has Jaya Bachchan ever heard of a watch or a nice shirt?


#Vikram H,
Oh yeah, they had a gala ceremony to mark it, and book signing and what not. It's like a family party taken outdoors! :P
ps: Yes yes I noticed you're back, I already replied to your comment in my last post. :)

#Lonely Traveller,
Yeah, it is a coffee table book with loads of pictures of his grandparents, parents, children, grandchildren, everything!

Sexy Sam??? Amitabh as Sexy Sam??? :O
I'm going for KANK tonight. *gulp* :O

Thanks! :)

#Ipanema Gal,
Thanks, dear! :P

perplexed kid said...

lol...funny post...

Ekta said...

u dont like amitabh bacchan!!
Did u really read the book though...should be interesting..want to try and get my hands on it!

The Inquisitive Akka said...

Hey cute title! 3kgs??Poor you!! Did you actually manage to read anything?You must have been too tired for that! Btw, my office was very close to NTU.In fact I visited the campus cos one of my friend's works there.

Anonymous said...

Hmm... so you are not going to the gym this weekend? :D


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Bhaarat said...

Have u emailed/smsed ur guide that u have given to Dr. Foo???

Had I been ur guide I would have never given it to be carried away. Such books are only for reference.

BTW what is the title of ur dissertation. Would like to read atleast your synopsis.

Janefield said...

@ Clueless...haven't you heard of AB's watch collection?? The man has the world's best watches, sometimes more than one of the same itself. He's famous for wearing 2 watches on the same wrist! He also has a humungous pen collection. The man can open a store only! I think that's why Jaya became ismart and gifted him such a heavy book! After all, that won't be as easy to collect now, would it? ;)

Lalit Singh said...

Laash ko thikaane laga diya muahaha! :D
Esmaart girrl!!!

Iday said...

3KGs ithna zyadha hota hai kya?!?!
i used to think it wudnt weigh that heavy.
almost all the laptop models i have shorlisted weigh around 3KGs.
Now i guess i gotta think again :)
i have no plans to build my biceps this way :(

Rebellion said...

That was a heavvvy one Sash :P

Glad you got rid of the bojha else probably we'd see the post full of @#$^%@$& for your supervisor :P

Btw, hope this wasn't the reason for you hating KANK???

Somehow, even though many die for AB, I don't.. I'd prefer junior AB anyday ;)

Take care,

The Lonely Traveller said...

Hope you njoi the movie....
Beware: The movie is not for the fainthearted... ;¬)
So many emotional dialogues....I could not bear any it....Had to empty a bottle of wine to wipe off the KANK memories..

Dev said...

Haan.... I can empathise bahi....

I'm a chem engr... an we had this reference book called Perry's which had 2000 odd pages in it. :O We had to lug it all the way from the hostels to class whenever we needed it. #&#&@# wouldnt fit in any bag either.

It was too much, so the simpler solution was to bunk the class instead. :P

qsg said...

Big B is bhunderphul - but he must reduce the number and range of ads! Needs to maintain some dignity!

Sayesha said...

#Perplexed kid,
Thanks :)

Yup yup, not a fan. I like Junior B though :P

//want to try and get my hands on it!

Try to buy it on the net... I'm sure there are tons of pple who're cursing the day they bought it! :P

I flicked thru the pics but did not really read it :P

Of course I'm going! Pran jaaye par gym na jaaye! :P

Abbe oye! Mere paas na leave hai na rokda hai, aur tu travel deal de raha hai? Kat le beta. Warna tu yahin kat jayega. :|

My supervisor trusts me. :)
ps: You wanna read my thesis synopsis? Hey bhagwan, kaise kaise nerds ko bheja hai duniya mein! :O :P

#Chosen One,
//He's famous for wearing 2 watches on the same wrist!

I knew it! Age has gotten to him! :P

Hehe! :P

That's the prob yaar... I'd love to carry a laptop around and blog whenever I want to.... lekin the damn weight is the problem! :(

Hahah! Nahin yaar, mera sup bahut achha hai yaar... :)

//hope this wasn't the reason for you hating KANK???

I didn't hate KANK yaar.. the funny parts were really funny.. lekin the serious parts need thoda processing before I review it... :)

//Somehow, even though many die for AB, I don't.. I'd prefer junior AB anyday ;)

Hee haa! Me too! :P

#Lonely Traveller,
Haan yaar... Rani itna royi itna royi ki baap re baap! :O

2000 pages! Sheesh! Perry, terry toh! :@

//It was too much, so the simpler solution was to bunk the class instead. :P

Wah mere sher! Creative problem solving at its best! :D

He shouldn't do stupid roles like 'Sexy Sam'. Gosh! :|

Wriju said...

And did you read the book? ;-)
While in college, I never read fat books, I built my biceps them!
Love your posts :-)

aditi said...

heylo!!! whats ur dissertation on???

Sayesha said...

Nahin yaar... no time to read the whole thing... so I just looked at the pictures :P
ps: Thanks! :)

Hey, girl! It's on this phenomenon called 'set-jetting' - people picking holiday destinations after seeing them in movies. I'm covering the Bollywood aspect of it. :)

Sudeep said...

3 kgs?? log kuch bhi karte hain..

lol @ the murderer disposing laash angle

i remembered a remix video in which a gal sitting on a window seat of a train probably has the same book in her hand.. coz coverpages pe big b ka pic tha.. acchi thi.. kitaab nahi re ladki acchi thi

Sayesha said...

Ladki ki shakal hi dekhi sirf? Uske Sunil Shetty type biceps nahin dekhe? :D

Dev said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sudeep said...

ROFL!! haan re.. 3 kgs carry karke kya fullto tole-shole ho gaye honge uske

Sayesha said...

Uske?? You mean mere?? :O

Nabeel said...

amitabh is an icon .. he is doing good movies these days ..