Monday, April 10, 2006

Daddy's girl

For the curious souls with good memories, yes, I got stood up last saturday.

I knew it. I told you.

Bwahahahaha! :(

If the brats had indeed turned up, I'd be blogging about them right now. But they did not.

So instead, I'm gonna write about men you can actually count on.

Dad, for example.

I called my parents yesterday. Dad said, "You know, we'd gone to see Haridwar over the weekend!"

"Achha? You know, I'd gone to see Banaras over the weekend!" I chirped.

It took me a while to calm down my completely freaked out parents, and explain the joke to them. Sheesh.

Dad sent me an email today describing his Haridwar trip. I always find his emails highly amusing. The subject line reads like a story. Today's was 'The monkey that ate the ice-cream' describing how a monkey approached Mom when she was eating ice-cream, so she got terrified and threw the ice-cream at it. The monkey caught it and ran up a tree, from where it winked (don't ask me how, ask my Dad!) at my ice-cream-less parents as it enjoyed its catch of the day.

Dad's writing style has remained the same over the years. Decades of being a banker has not managed to touch the creative writer in him. When I was really young, he used to write articles for the Times of India (in the days when it was a sensible newspaper, and not a tabloid like it is now), and his bank's inhouse magazine, which I used to read with delight, and then show off to my friends.

His articles were like my blog posts. He would observe things around him and write about his interpretations of them, often with catchy titles. I remember one of his articles about Mom using henna to dye her hair, and one of the phrases he used in it went something like 'When the wife dyed'.

I don't think Mom was too happy about it.


But I found the article hilarious.

Till I was at the receiving end.

One day, it was pouring like crazy, and he was taking me to the bus stop under his huge black umbrella. I had to cross the road, but a stream of muddy water was running along, leaving no room for me to jump across without ruining my shoes. The bus was already at the bus stop and the driver was honking for me to hurry up. (Yes, those were my gang days, and even the driver was my buddy who wouldn't leave without me.) My friends looked on from their respective 'window seats'.

"Dad?" I looked at him helplessly.

He took a deep breath, held the umbrella high up with his left hand, and with one clean sweep of his right hand, lifted me up and carried me across the road, his sandals making squelching sounds in the muddy water.

Okay, I SO did not see that coming.

When you're 14 and a gang leader, there's a certain reputation you must maintain. You cannot be seen in public, being lifted off the road by your Dad as if you were a two-year-old toddler who wears pink plastic shoes that squeak.

My friends were laughing their guts out when I entered the bus. Devoid of all dignity, I took my seat, and glared at Dad angrily from my 'window seat' while he put on this sad "What else could I do?" expression.

I was much ridiculed at school that day. But time is a great healer. Days and weeks went by, and the emotional scars started healing.

Till the day I came back from school to see Dad cutting his latest article out.

"Oooh! New one??" I asked, all excited.

"Yes!" He smiled.

"Show me!" I snatched it and sat down on the dining table to eat my lunch and read it.

I can't remember the exact title but it went something like 'A tale of a modern Vasudev and Krishna'. He had narrated how, just like Vasudev had carried the infant Lord Krishna across the Yamuna, he too had carried his little Krishna across a stream of muddy water to ensure she caught the school bus. (You see? The analogy thing is in the genes!)

"You wrote about that day???" I was aghast!

"Yes! Do you like it?" He smiled.

"Of course not!"

"Huh? Why not????"

"Because it's about me!"

"So?"


"My friends read your articles!!"

"So??"

"They had forgotten all about the bus incident, and now they will recall it! And those who were not in the bus that day will also read it and laugh at me! Not to mention that the whole country's going to be reading this and laughing!" I was almost in tears.

"What's there to laugh at?"

I did not know how to explain to him that public appearances of gang leaders must always be accompanied by extreme dignity.

"You won't understand."

I sulked for days. People praised my Dad to the heavens for that article. That made me sulk some more.

"Don't write about me ever again." I said to him.

In retrospect, it was so mean of me to try and stifle his creativity.

Dad, I know you don't know I have a blog, and so you will never get to read this, but I just wanna say 'Sorry' for being so unfair.

If only you knew how many posts (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9) I have written about you on my blog.



72 comments:

Unknown said...

oh no u got stood up...!!
waaaah

Unknown said...

but why am I crying?? I, got the GOLD. and that girl..whatzhername...she should be crying.
HEEEEEEEEEHHAHAHAHAH

Now i'm almost crying out of absolute senti. :( so that's where you get your writing talent from, haan, sayesha? very nice.

i remember my dad insisting to hold my had while crossing the road, even after i was quite grown up, and he'd say "i'm not worried about you, i am scared, so please hold my hand". :)

p.s: thanks for keeping up the deal sayesha. (Surreptitious wink)

R said...

SILVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
*takes a bow*

R said...

awwwww..tht wz so sweet!!

P.S. i like your Dad, whatever that means!!!

Shobana said...

:) dads...

Lalit Singh said...

'When the wife dyed'.
hahahaha
sahi hain!!

Anonymous said...

i did Visualize

got carried away

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

DAMNNNN!!! I was there at Orkut wasting my time while you posted it...AAARGH! Let me read the post now. :|

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

Dads are the bestest persons in this world...and they make you realise that yeah, maybe your mom might have some good in her to get a person like your dad. ;)

'When the wife dyed'
Hahahahaha.

And Sayesha, I absolutely REFUSE to recognize Ipanema girl's gold for this post. You both plotted against me! Shame! *sulks*

Siddhu said...

Why is Sayesha's a dad-unfriendly place? ;)

Mohan Kodali said...

lol!!! the titles were really gud. :d

Rays Of Sun said...

Man..now I know about your writing skills...Chal it all goes to your genes..Mere saare praises lauta de Sash:D

vibhav said...

Revenge, is that? He wrote one article about you and you wrote 10? Anyway, now the world knows what's the secret of your writings, it just the purani genes, which too get better with seasons.

shub said...

ahh no wonder u write so well! :)
You see? The analogy thing is in the genes! that line cracked me up!!i think its a rare quality to take poke fun at oneself :D No offence at all... but I think you're lightening up! Cheers!

R said...

Daddies rock!

My Daddy strongest!
Remember this advertisement?

Shreyansh said...

Adorably refreshing likha hai re!

Loved it!!

Adi Oso-Groot Finch said...

Nice post dudette!!

Btw, moms are good and daddies better.... but my daddy bestest. :)

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

@Rohit:
My Daddy STRONGEST
OH YEAH! It was some cooking oil's ad...I loooooooved this. :D

Shekhar said...

*sings* Tumne pukara aur hum chale aaye...

I've decided to continue blogging again. :)

Two more points:

1. I was seriously about to ask you about your *date* last Saturday when you spoke about it yourself. :D

2. Tera Dadi ka role confirmed. Have spoken to producer sahab. He says you will fit the bill perfectly as long as you keep coming up with witty analogies for the role. :P

Shekhar said...

//continue blogging again.

Sheesh!!! What pathetic English usage on my part.

Earlier today, I was with a friend and both of us were supposed to good at English when we were in school. Yet, that didn't stop us from making a comment like "Personally, in my opinion..." within a few minutes of each other. LOL.

Sayesha said...

#Ipanema Girl,
Haan re.. got stood up! Men, I tell you! Hmmmph! :/

//i'm not worried about you, i am scared, so please hold my hand

Hahahaha! :D

//thanks for keeping up the deal sayesha.

Deal? What deal? *innocent look*
ps: Seriously, what deal? *innocent look*

#Moonie,
Thanks! I like my Dad too! :)

#Jade,
:)

#Fishy,
Hehehehe... I know! :P

#Lalit,
:D
But I don't think Mom saw the humour there... :P

#Utham,
:)

#World Girl,
Aur kar time waste Orkut par, Mona
Aur Ipa Girl leke jaayegi sara sona!

#Siddhu,
Hehehe... Sayeshaz doesn't allow family in. Because they read in between the lines, ask too many questions, and worry. :P

#Chandu,
Thanks! :)

#ROS,
*Sash puts all the praises in a bag and runs away with it screaming "Nahinnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"* :D

#The Anonymous,
//purani genes

HAHAHAHA! That totally cracked me up! :P

#Jade,
Thanks! :)

//No offence at all...

Isn't it amazing how we pretend to believe that this phrase can protect us against anything that follows? :P

//but I think you're lightening up!

Thanks! It's all the gymming and reduction of carbs in the diet yaar. Hehehe! :)

Well, I don't know in what way you meant it when you wrote it, but my so called lightening up is not because 'Oh I have realised it was all my fault and the MACs were always right'. It is because I have always made fun of myself on my blog. And I will continue my fight against the MACs because I believe it is a fight for a good reason. The only defence MACs use against me the right to freedom of expression. But they forget one minor detail. There is a difference between legal rights and moral rights. And how you use them depends on the kind of person you are. If a person is posting malicious comments anonymously, and defends it as his legal right - freedom of expression - I believe it speaks more about his character than mine. There's a way to criticse people, and a way to treat people. A little respect never hurt anyone.

Anyway, thanks for monitoring my character-building. Perhaps in a few more days, I will lighten up so much I will become a completely spineless blogger. What say? :)

#Rohit,
Oooh, love that ad! Damn that should have been the title of this post! :D

#Shreyansh,
Thanks! :)

#Raven,
Kal subah paanch baje, see you in the akhada with your Dad! Hah! :D

#World Girl,
Cooking oil ka ad tha? I thought bournvita or something like that! :P

#Shekhar,
Great! I'm so happy you decided to resume blogging! :)

1. "Date" ki waat lagi yaar!
2. Cool! I will go and write my one-liners now. Can Shaan be your first guest? :P

//Personally, in my opinion...

Hehehehe! :P

BP said...

Shucks! Well, boys will be boys... :P

Great post! Like father, like daughter :)

Kusum Rohra said...

Oye sayesh some coincience this is :) i am writing a post about my dad :)

He lifted you like you were a toddler :) I so wish i were there to lift oops i mean pull ur legs :)

Kusum Rohra said...

Oye sayesh some coincience this is :) i am writing a post about my dad :)

He lifted you like you were a toddler :) I so wish i were there to lift oops i mean pull ur legs :)

Sneha Acharya said...

oops so cute of ur dad :-))) ya it happens some times tht our parents spread our glory like anythng :-))

R said...

:D :D :D

Sayesha said...

#Banana,
Thanks! :)

#Kusum,
Oye tu rehne de... tu already kaafi khinchaayi karti hai! :D

#Sneha,
Hahaha! Yeah, "spread glory" is the correct term! :D

#Rohit,
:D

Anonymous said...

:)

Anonymous said...

u should tell ur dad about ur blog..he wud b proud of u..n also happy..esp da ones dedicated2 him..:-)

Anonymous said...

That was very sweet... u wrote just what i needed the most...:) Dad's Love is wonderful :)

-aethyr
PS: too tired to login and then publish. how are u doing?

Aj said...

Dad-daughter bondings... hmm
My dad also a banker.but he just learned emailing n stuff :) while I visited Delhi on home visit leave
Have put all on blog

Shekhar said...

Oye, Shaan can definitely be the first guest, as long as you sing "On the roof...in the rain" with him. :P

Siddhu said...

Wah, ur postin only once in two days now.

Frustrating, when I open your blog like I open rediff up.:D

tcr_79 said...

Very nicely written :)

And now I know where you have your great writing from :)

Anonymous said...

I think I have read "wife dyed" wala article.. (ya I have been reading TOI since I was 10), missed the one where you get mentioned. Damn!

Baki kya bol sakta hoon... everything has been said already.. "like father..", "funny hai", "refreshing hai", etc. etc. Huh mean people.. sab kuch keh dala!

Sayesha said...

#Anonymous,
:)

#Anonymous,
No yaar... cos sometimes I write serious stuff, and you know how parents are... they love to get all worked up for no reason... unko tension kaiku dene ka :P
I will copy paste some of my posts in an email and send it to him! :P

#Aethyr,
Thanks! :)
ps: Hahahah! Tu bhi ROS ki tarah lazybum ho gayi hai... woh bhi kabhi kabhi sign in nahin karti and then she says, "sign in karne ko pak raha tha"! :D
pps: Me doing good re... exams next week :(

#AJ,
Hahahaha! You should totally read my post where I described how my Dad picked up his emailing skills! :D

#Shekhar,
Sheesh!!! Not a bad idea tho! ;)

#Siddhu,
Yeah man... gotta study for exams too.. starting next week :(

//Frustrating, when I open your blog like I open rediff up

Hehehe! :P

#TCR,
Thanks! :)

#Pradyot,
Really??? Wow! :)

Nirwa Mehta said...

Hey Sayesha,

Nice world you've got yourself out there! I can relate myself to most of the things you've written out here..

You've got nice spontaneous humour! :) Like your style!! Oh, and I bow down to thee for watching Banaras.. I've seen Mr Prime Minister (yes, a film by that name directed and, more importantly, acted by Dev Anand) and there were just 8 people in the theatre! :D Beat me at that.. hehehe

Nice writeups! :)

Nirwa

Abhishek Upadhyay said...

Oh,
That was such a sweet post. When we were small in one way or the other we hurt our parents and then regret about it when we grow up.
I remember when I was in fourth std and just started using pen in school (instead of pencil). My father gifted me a very good Fountain Pen on my birthday. Day before I had told him that I wanted Reynolds Ball Pen coz my friends told that it’s the best pen in world. I was new to the Pen-world and didn’t knew whats ball-pen and whats fountain or Reynolds. My father brought a pen that was 10 times much better than the cheap Reynolds. Seeing that its not reynold I threw and broke it (ya I was very arrogant). After that my father took me to the shop and purchased whole packet of Reynolds ball pen for me….coz he did not want to hurt me that day.

When I recall this great act….I feel so sad that this was the way we once treated our parents.

Anonymous said...

Mean.

Sayesha said...

#Nirwa,
Welcome to Sayeshaz! :) Thanks for commenting :)

//Mr Prime Minister (yes, a film by that name directed and, more importantly, acted by Dev Anand) and there were just 8 people in the theatre!

Oh My Gawdddd!!! Hahahahaha! :D

#Abhishek,
Sheesh! This reminds me of the time I got pissed off with Dad about something and tore his copy of the Illustrated Weekly of India! :O

#Anon,
Err... Mean post? Mean you? Mean me? :?

Nirwa Mehta said...

Anon probably means Mean as in Mean - Median - Mode..

http://www.dogmatrix.com/modules/myReviews/detailfile.php?lid=197 try that for mr prime minister's review! :P

Nirwa

virdi said...

happy birthday sayesha...

i wished u furst...

V..

Kusum Rohra said...

@Virdi:Cheater kahinke, her birthday is tomorrow so your wishes are hereby declared null and void as per the joint laws of singgy and inddy huh!

*jealously leads to such comments*

Unknown said...

heppy budday to you!!!

The Girl Who Sold The World said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Girl Who Sold The World said...

10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2...and...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!!! YESSS, I am the first one to wish you!!! :D Time se pehle wish karne waalon ka count nahin hota. ;)
The Girl Sings
"Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to dear Sayesha
Happy birthday to you!

May you have many boyfriends"...errr....guess this lats part is okay in school only. :P

Meanwhile, Sayesha is seen running off with her hands on her ears. Hahaha *laughs at her own corny joke.* :P

Chalo, ta-ta! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, again! (This last wish was just to remind you that...ahem...treat is due to the first wisher :P )

Sahil said...

Hey there beautiful,

Wanted to wish you a VERY happy birthday (and actually wish you *on* your birthday). Aur aap ka birthday toh abh acha jaayega hi, kyun ki humne wish kardiya ;) Hope aap, aur aap ka blog, dono bahut khush rahe aur unko lambiiiiiiiii umar ki duahyein deyte hain

so do we all get a special birthday treat? Kuch special blog post? Kuch khaas humaare liye bhi likhna chahiye. Like a whole blog post for aap ka 'puraana diljale'. Wait a minute... it's your birthday, so we should be giving u stuff rite? Oh well, I give u, u give me, same thing :P

Oh, and in case your wondering, I've been around reading your blog and the comments... just been a silent commentator for a while - but hum yaheen hain, kahin nahin jayenge. Vaise bhi aap ka blog chod kar kaha jayenge?

Have a fabulous birthday my dear!

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

Dekha! Poore time par wish kiya! :D Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!! Sayesha, TREAT, TREAT, TREAT!!!!!!!!! :P

***Typo correction: I meant "last", not "lats". ;)

Sahil said...

kya man GWSTW - aaj ke din toh mere ko first hone deyti! B'day par bhi first wish karna?

Aaj kal ke bache man....

shub said...

ooh no wonder no post! I i htought it was the exams! happy birthday girl! can you believe i was flipping through your archives a coupla days back and came across your last years' birthday post! yet it didnt occur to me! :(

well, hope you had a fabulous day! damn its 12.01 :(

shub said...

oh its today?! i mean april 13th? cool then:D have a fab day then! :D

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

@Sahil:
Oops...sorry, pata nahin that that you were also waiting for 12 o' clock. Okay, okay, gold transfer system. *The Girl transfers her gold to Sahil because he wanted to be first on this special occasion and herself snatches away his silver*. Happy? :P

Sahil said...

nahin re - bache log ko khush hone do. Jaa - tuh rakhle. Tuh bhi kya yaad rakhegi :)

R said...

SAYESHA!

HAPPY HAPPY SHAPPY BUDDAY!

:D

Have fun!

Kaala Kavva said...

oye!!!!!!!
BUDDAY BUDDAY HAPPY BUDDAY!
(and the gull aur rohit ko maine bataya tere bday ka!!)

Sahil said...

btw Sayesha - tera:

bwahahaha! :(

cracks me up EVERYTIME I see it! It's like, if u have a bad day, all u gotta do is read her bwahahaha! :( to make urself laugh. It's kinda like your "bwahahaha" crashes into a brick wall! Funny stuff :)

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

SHARAM NAHIN AATI, CHAPAAT?!!! Sayesha, Chapaat ne kucch nahin bataya. ROS ne bataya mujhe. Aur maine Rohit ko. :P Chapaat toh gtalk par timepass kar raha tha. I was the one who told him to go. HMPH! Jhooth ki bhi hadd hoti hai. *Shakes head sadly* Aaj kal ke Chapaats. Chapaat to you!

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

@Sahil: Thankee, thankee. *The Girl looks at her gold lovingly* :D

Kaala Kavva said...

nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin
tu sachayee ke naam pe kalank hai gull!
jhooth na bol
kahani to achi bana leti hai!
koi suboot hai tere paas!!!!??
huh!

mai begunah hu me-lord(sayesha)
mai begunah hu!!!

R said...

Damn you all.

Sayesha, I got to know through ROS's post. I won't lie. No, I won't.

Anonymous said...

Umm... Okay, I shouldn't lie.
Chapaat told me... :D

(sorry navs.. sach bolna hee pada)

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

MUAHAHAHAHA *evil "laaf"* Sayesha ko saboot already mil chuka hai...Sayesha, mera 11:49 waala time testing 123 waala comment dekha tha na? See, I KNEW it beforehand. Kal ROS ki post padhi thi. :D And this naachta-koodta X was even ignorant of your budday. I told him! Yehi gunhegaar hai! Mera toh vaise bhi record hai gold shoot karne ka! Chapaat is guilty. Jhooth bole, Chapaat lagey!
And Rohit toh jhooth nahin bolta. Trust him and give a Chapaat to Chapaat.

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

ROHIT!!!!!!!!! YOU BETRAYED ME!!!! :O :O :O Heck, you don't even KNOW Chapaat! Sayesha, dekh kya kya ho raha hai is blog par! TWO liars! I take my words back that Rohit doesn't lie. HE DOES! Rohit, I'll put my dark magic on your submissions...be afraid, be VERY afraid! Now, tell the truth, liars!

R said...

Whoever has the same display name as mine--and is trying to act over-smart.. STAY AWAY!

Sayesha and Navdeep, that's not me! That's some looser.

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

*Gasps* Chapaat, ITNA jhooth?! :O It wasn't Rohit at all in the second comment, Sayesha. Chapaat did that by writing Rohit's name in that "name box" and leaving Rohit's profile's link below. Damn you, Chapaat! Sayesha ji, culprit is exposed. The case is very clear. The Girl and Rohit are speaking the truth. Chapaat is guilty of lying and of using false evidence to save himself.

R said...

The Girl... I didn't betray! :D

Whoever used my name and put a comment here! Ugh!

R said...

And, my display pic's back. :D

R said...

Ah, I'm glad The Girl is supporting me here. Sachchai ab bhi zinda hai MyLord. Aapke Birthday ke din kya kya hua yahan, aapke hi blog pe..per...hmm..The Girl and Rohit have controlled the situation.

Many many happy returns of the day, again!

Kaala Kavva said...

Arre yeh chapaat to bahut hee chhata huva badmaash lagta hai
isko to sazaa milni chaheye!
I'm with you guys!

Sahil said...

offo - mere b'day wish ka jawaab nahin. Besharam ladki!

Sayesha said...

#Nirwa,
Wow... you just reminded me that I have my Statistics exam on Wednesday! :(

#Virdi,
Thanks! Lekin thoda jaldi ho gaya! :D

#Kusum,
Hahahaha! I support you babe! :)

#Ipanema girl,
Thanks! :)

#World girl,
Hahaha! Thanks! :D

#Sahil,
Okay, you just made me forgive you for abandoning my blog. Bahut dinon baad aapne dil se kuchh likha hai... thanks! :) Puraane din yaad aa gaye :)

#World Girl,
Hmmm... tere typo ki wajah se Sahil gold le gaya lagta hai! ;)

#Sahil,
Yehi hota hai jab koi kisi ko abandon kar deta hai... doosre log woh jagah le lete hain...

#Shub,
Thanks! :)

#World Girl,
Yeh hui na achhe bachon wali baat! :)

#Sahil,
Offo! I give up! You guys decide between yourselves! :/

#Rohit,
Thanks! :)

#Ze Ex,
Arre sabko batakar khud late ho gaya? :D Thanks thanks! :)

#Sahil,
Glad to bring you some laughter, my dear. As long as you're not laughing AT me! :O

#World Girl,
Offo ab yeh doosra jhagda? Sheesh!

#Tu Kaun,
Adaalat mein chillao mat! Warna ise adaalat ki tauheen maani jayegi! :D

#Rohit,
Sheesh... nayi nautanki shuru? :D

#Nakli rohit talwar,
Arre yaar, Rohit ka R capital letters mein hai... fraud karna hai toh theek se kar! Offo!

#The Girl,
Arre yaar I saw your comment on ROS' post... tu akeli yahan sach bol rahi hai :D

#Asli Rohit,
Arre maloom hai re, don't worry! :)
ps: Thanks! :)

#Chapaar,
Sahi bola re! One kaan ke neeche to you! *CHAPAAAAAAAAT*

#Sahil,
Arre time lagta hai baba... kitne posts hain, kitne comments hai.. waqt toh lagega na... waise bhi aapko shikaayat karne ka haq nahin hai... gaayab ho jaate ho aise hi, and then you come back months later and demand attention? Hmmmph! :/
ps: Ab aa hi gaye toh teen-chaar drinks peekar hi jao :)

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