Me, myself and Ian

So after my first semester results were out, I sent the following email to my boss and the editors in my team.

Dear team,

Thank you for your support and co-operation in my first semester. I managed to get one A and two Bs. The annoying nerd in me is not too thrilled with the grades, but the editor swamped by work and cross-country travelling is quite proud of herself.

My classes have started for this semester, so I will be going off to NTU at 4 pm again on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. Do keep the timing in mind when you place stuff in my in-tray or if you want to schedule meetings where you need me to be present.

Thanks again!
Sayesha

My editor Banana sent me an email congratulating me on my grades. I sent her a note of thanks, but not before the cheekier side of me had gotten the better of me and added the words "Ian thinks that should have been 2 As and a B." She thought I was talking about some lecturer or classmate, but I wasn't.

I was talking about Ian = Inner annoying nerd.

In my school days, I was quite the nerd, but a somewhat fun one I think. In uni, being a nerd was 'uncool'. Not studying was cool. And so I tossed Ian into a box, locked the box and tossed the key in the Nanyang Lake. But Ian with his Houdini-like skills managed to escape three years later and presented himself to me, angry, dishevelled and in desperate need of a bath.

And now he's back in the groove.

Last Friday, when my monitor blacked out on me, Ian did a little victory dance when he saw me type the words on my blogpost, "Instead, over the weekend, I will utilise my computer time to indulge in the very interesting activity of doing homework."

"And you should get up really early and go to the library and do your Media Law homework. The library is open from 8:30 am to 12:30 pm."

"What?? I get up at six every day! I'm not gonna get up early on a Saturday, Ian!"

"But you must you must! You have to do better this semester!"

"I did very well last semester, Ian! Considering that the full-timers pull the grades of the part-timers down, I think I did good."

"That's nonsense. Who said the full-timers pull the grades of the part-timers down??"

"The lecturers did! They told us that the part-timers must work extra hard because we have to juggle work with studies and we don't have enough time for assignments and term papers and homework as the full-timers!"

"Whatever! We will prove your lecturers wrong! Go to bed now, I'll wake you up early morning tomorrow."

And he did. He woke me up at 7 am and I had to trudge my way to the library to do my Media Law homework for the week.

Today, in the Media Law class, my lecturer praised me. "Excellent analysis, Sayesha." He remarked.

"See see?" Ian had materialised out of nowhere and was nudging me.

"Offo! Yeah, okay fine. Thanks." I said grudgingly.

"You could say that a bit more dil se..." He sulked.

"Okay, don't create a scene here. I thank you baba. Dil se. Khush?"

"Khush!" He said happily. (Sheesh, he's exactly like me in some ways! Sulks and then immediately forgets everything and cheers up.)

I guess Ian's gonna keep me company for two more semesters. He's gonna push me to the limits, but he's gonna get me results. So yes, sometimes I'm thankful for his presence (and I said that because he's reading this over my shoulder.)

I think that on some levels, we all need an Ian.

To show us what we are capable of, to push us in what we know is the right direction. To rescue us from our laziest, most complacent side.

I think we all have it in us.

Do you have an Ian?