Saturday, September 23, 2006

It's a childhood thing

Today I apologised to my washing machine.

I think I am going nuts. I'd put my clothes for a wash. About an hour later, I went to pick them up from the machine to dry them. Without looking at the timer, I opened the top cover, and suddenly realised that the washload was still spinning.

"Oops! Sorry!" I put the cover back.

And it was then that I realised that I had just apologised to my washing machine.

I think this kind of interacting with non-living things dates way back to my childhood in India, where every non-living thing had an identity, a respect, an image.

When I was a toddler, and my finger got crushed by the door hinge, I ran to Mom bawling so loudly that even the neighbours could hear me. Mom tried to calm me down but I just got louder and louder. She put my finger in a bowl of ice, and I bawled even more. To make me stop and preserve her dignity in the locality, she said, "Achha? Us door ne meri beti ki ungli crush kar di? Abhi dekhti hoon!" And she "slapped" the door.

"Theek hai abhi?" She asked.

"Haan." I grinned. Suddenly the pain in my finger was gone. The wrong-doer had got what he deserved. Justice had been administered.

As far as I was concerned, the house was teeming with other non-living things that were the enemy too, out to get me, the innocent kid who had caused them no harm. But they were adequately punished. Nothing was spared. Tables and chairs that got in the way of the princess, moving blades of fans which the royal one decided to stick her finger into, sharp pencils that hurt her hands, knives that cut the princess' fingers as she deemed herself qualified to make a sandwich at that age, hammers that fell on the little one's thumb as she thought she could hang a picture by herself, drawer edges that knocked into her, slippery bathroom floors that gave way under her tiny feet. They all got whacked, while I looked on with silent pride at the might of my mother.

And then something not so happening happened.

I grew up.

Things in my house stopped getting whackings from my Mom. In time, I started to see the humour in the situation. And of course, wisdom kicked in. The house was not teeming with things that were out to get me. Non-living things were exactly that - non-living and nothing more.

I guess some things from our childhood just stay with us forever. Even though we don't know they do.

All it takes is an offended washing machine to make you realise that years later.


Dan said...

Poor abused washing machine! You can call yourself lucky if she does not sue you!
If the non-living things should ever decide to form a union, you'll be in trouble...


Shekhar said...

Just missed the Gold....itne se... !!!

But.....SILVER !!! Yeah !! :D :D :D

And yes, the 'hitting inanimate thingy' was done by my Mom too, although she kinda instigated a more macho thing by making 'me' hit the offending door/table/chair. Needless to say, today when I see my 2 and a half year old nephew do the same thing, I find it sooooo ultra cute. :)

Bebo said...

Nice post!

The Inquisitive Akka said...

PLATINUM!!!(a new position I just made up!)
Yeah we still do that to make kids feel better! :) Anthropomorphism at its best :)

Dev said...

Heh heh heh... that was too good... Made me smile after a long time!
There's a small part of Sayesha Bhai that never grew up...
Quite apparent in ur posts.. here's wishing it never does ;)

Iday said...

after reading ur post, i'm beginning to wonder whether u have all 10 fingers of ur hands intact!!!
Doors and fan blades and pencils and knives and hammers - sab teek tho hai na :P

Adarsh said...

very very sweet post.... really. [:)]

Anoop Sundaram said...

well u do have a way of making normal or some insignificant things interesting :)) real nice one!

Hari said...

It would have happened to all of us out here, when we were toddlers (prince/princess) but only a select few blog about them and remind the others about it, so that they sit there with a smile on their faces!! Beautiful topic to write on...

Mommy used to say, that when I was a tiny tot, I always became happy when a little warm stream came beneath my trousers,when I was busy doing other things, that I would get all excited and tap the liquid with both my hands (enjoying the splashings!!!) before an adult (spoilsport) jumped into action and lifted me high up :(

qsg said...

:) Our moms had a way of making us stop bawling - yes, I remember her hitting the inanimate objects to make my pain go away! :D It was so simple to make it all go away then! :)

Boogerworm said...

you just brought back my childhood memories...

cardamom said...

Cute Post!!

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

:-) cho chweet. i've grown up, so now i curse instead. ;)

satish said...

i really hope u said 'thankyou' too, wen washing was done.

Rohit Talwar said...

You grew up?





Sakshi said...

I wonder how my boss will feel if I smack the dissection scope because of the pain it causes me?

Dreamcatcher said...

Too cute. I think I should apologise to my computer - excessive use and constant playing of music.

raghu said...

lolz.. ur goin nuts im 4evr nuts!
so many comments.. makin me j!

raghu said...

kool u blog evryday... itll b fun readin sumthin new evryday..get bugged ya.. me also blogs evryday
n i hav 2 blogs!

The Smiling Girl said...

Guess its the same everywhere.. :)
I remember people around me scolding the doors and chakus then.. :).. and now also.. :D:D:D

Rebellion said...


Please don't ask me the meaning Sash, guess it should not be open publically but thats what I call you post!! It was awesome :D

Do you know, I still apologise my car everytime I miss to see the bumper or make it jump coz of my rash driving but somehow I never thought from this angle.. You made me think, hats off to you dear :)

Take care,

Bhaarat said...

At my home things were little different. If I take the same example of door, my father would have told me to take care in future because door doesnt understand the way we understand. But I believe the way we behave is spontaneous behavior so that we remain well behaved with living beings. It is difficult to react differently to a similar situation with same level of spontaneity.

PizzaDude said...

Haa Haa Haa..... That was hilarious!!

PizzaDude said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
PizzaDude said...

I just could not stop laughing after reading the first couple of paragraphs. People around in office are wondering what's happening...

Iday said...

bai - kahan hai thu?!?! dho dhin kuch khabar hi nahin!!!
bin bathaye kahin tour chala gaya kya?!!?

mysorean said...

Offended washing machine LOL!

I have this thing: I keep thinking something and move my hands and fingers around as if I am talking it out. Generally I do it while driving and while at the dining table. So, I have a few :O faces looking at me!

Anonymous said...

Nice Post :)

Tapori Adi

Jeevan Baretto said...

Hey it has happened with me too..
Another thing I want to share is that, moms generally have some wierd names for the things which only you can understand.. like for a crow she would say.. 'kaaaka' n more.. :-) It's nice to recollect them now..!!

Sudeep said...

:) @ door incident

Anonymous said...

Awesome post!! (Reminded me of the series, "Wonder years")

Canary said...

wat if these inanimate things really had life ? :o
nice one.. :)

GuNs said...

[:D]I dont know about you but I sometimes think these inanimate objects which I really love give me strength. For example, my cycle is something I absolutely adore. It is actually my dad's cycle which hes hsd even before I was born. I've seen that cycle since then and when I could ride it, dad gave it to me and I've cared for it long enough. Sometimes when I was going for a tough paper in the exams, I patted its seat and said "Pray for me, dude".


Sayesha said...

Heyyy! I'm kind to non-living things ok? :P

Hahaha! More macho it seems! Apna profile pic dekha hai? :D

#SH D,
Thanks :)

Arre that position was made loooong ago, we even have scrap metal at the bar! ;)

Thanks! :)

Hahahahaha! They're all in good shape. And good shape too! ;)

Thanks :) I see you're an Orkut user :)

Thanks :)

SHEESH! What a splashing headline! :D You toh totally stole my post's thunder! :O

//It was so simple to make it all go away then! :)

Sigh... if only it worked now :)


Thanks :)

#Ipanema Gal,
Hahahaha! Curse le beta... and be thankful that they don't curse back! :O

Oye! Mera dimaag UTNA bhi kharaab nahin hai ok???? X-(

ps: I will tell Mom and she will give you one big thappad! Hmmmph!


Hahahaha, I'm sure your comp enjoys the music too :)


#Smiling Girl,
Hahahah! This reminds me of the chaku-chaku game! :D

Thanks! :)
ps: Yeh S-O-R kya hai???????? Sorry bolte bolte mind change kar liya kya? :D

Baap re, tu serious ho gaya yaar :)

ps: If you get fired, you can join my bar as a bouncer. The last one quit because he couldn't take orange juice day in day out :P

Apun idharich hai re... bhot sara supaari pending tha na... apun settal kar raha tha :D

Hahaha! I'd like to see you do that! :)

#Tapori Adi,
Thanks :)

Hahaha yeah!! :D


Thanks! :)
ps: Where the hell were you man?? :/

Interesting thought... a bit freaky too :P

Ah, another Orkut user! :)
Hope your cycle helped you thru your exams! ;)

Iday said...

//Apun idharich hai re... bhot sara supaari pending tha na... apun settal kar raha tha :D
Sab settal vettal ho gaya naa?
Thik hai!

Lage raho...

How do we know said...

You know what Sayesha? For al ong time, we believed that plants are non living.
Today, it is obvious that things we call "non living" display at least one "characteristic" of loving beings: They decay with time. Of course, that they also need nourishment with oil, or whatever it takes, is another matter. How, then, can we call anything non living?

I strongly suspect that one day, we will wake up to realise that we were dumb throughout.. how else do you explain a TV that has moods like your pet dog? or a remote that refuses to work after you've cursed it, till you go back and say ok, sorry and handle it with more caress in your touch?

Nosirreee.. the theory of non living things, we do not bite!

Ashish Gupta said...
[1.6 MB]

You are gonna just love this one :-)

Ashish Gupta said...

Oops! dont stream, rather download it.

The Inquisitive Akka said...

Fine, then I shall start using alloys :)

Rebellion said...

No re Sash,

It stands for.. Forget it, kabhi IM par bataungi! One of my slang words yaar, but don't worry, stands for A-W-E-S-O-M-E :)

Take care,

Rohit Talwar said...

Err, did you tell Aunty then? Huh?


*points and laughs uncontrollably*


Sayesha said...

Ho raha hai settal dheere dheere... yeh dada-giri hai mamu, time toh lagega! :D

#How do we know,
Interesting... very interesting... freaky too :|

I can't view it! :'(

Hahahahaha! Bronze is already an alloy... hahahahaha... come up with something better... like PVC or something :P

Tu aur slang words??? :O :O :O
Gotta catch you on yahoo sometime! :D

Yes I did! Hmmph!
ps: She said, "Theek hi toh kehta hai Rohit." X-(

raghu said...

u call ur sis akka?
so do i!!

Sayesha said...

I call her apa :)

Janitri said...

ha ha ha... had a hearty laugh...but guess most of us are like this :)