B(l)ogged down

Something happened to my blog in the last coupla days.

It went kaput.

'FORBIDDEN. You don't have permission to access this page'.

I have often felt like saying that to some people here, but the cheek of Blogger to say that to me? Me, the owner of Sayeshaz?? You forbid me from entering my own bar? I need 'permission' from you?? What the...?!

I panicked. I did not know what the hell had happened. Everyone's blog was working fine, except mine. Had a MACker MACked into my blog and turned it off? Or was it true what Kini said - that Blogger shut down my blog because I was putting too many people to sleep?

Were all the posts and comments lost?

Then I saw that Virdi's blog had the same problem. "Yeay!!!" I went. (Sorry Virdi!). But soon after, his blog recovered, but mine was still down. Darn!

I emailed Bugger... err... I mean Blogger about the problem. They emailed back to ask me to see if their site had any info on the problem. It didn't. So I emailed them again to tell them it didn't.

"I can't view my blog! Please help!" I wrote, not even sure whether a human was gonna read it.

They emailed back a day later, saying everything is okay now.

Yipee! I went to check.

Instead of the familiar greenery, I was greeted by a blank page.

A friend of mine remarked, "Hey, your blog looks like your mind. Blank."

Gee, thanks.

If you have friends like this, you turn to strangers for help. I sent another email to Blogger. Now even they had started ignoring me!

Then I started bugging random people on yahoo, on gtalk, on MSN.

I told Ze Chapaat, "Mera blog theek kar de na!" For the sole purpose of flattery, I added, "Tu toh nerd hai, tu toh geek hai, mera blog theek kar de na!"

I realised it was the wrong thing to say when he brb'ed himself out of the conversation and never rb'ed again.

I felt distressed. Abandoned.

How could it happen the other way? I have abandoned my blog many a times, sometimes due to exams, sometimes due to vacations, sometimes due to work, and sometimes due to too many questions in my head.

But this is the first time my blog had abandoned me.

And it was painful. I will think twice about chiding smokers to give up their cigs overnight. Withdrawal symptoms can be maddening.

And the most frustrating thing is -- when something like this happens, that's when your mind is full of ideas for new posts, and there is no sign whatsoever of the 'writer's blog' symptom which all of us face every now and then.

As I saw other bloggers happily blogging away on their active blogs, and my blog lay there dormant, these lines from the song "Megha chhayi aadhi raat" crossed my mind:

Sabke aangan diya jaley re, morey aangan jiya
Hawa laage shool jaisi, tana marey chunariya

In this case, 'hawa' was the emails I was getting from people who could not access my blog, and 'tana' was Mr Ritesh Kini.

To vent my frustration, I even created a Sayesha's back-up world.

It's over now. What a relief. Thanks to whoever - human or machine - helped set this right. You have no idea what my blog means to me.

(Thanks for Vikram too for using his contacts in 'high places' and making some calls to expedite the resurrection. Viks, don't blame me if everyone wants to be your friend after reading this!)

And I learnt something bigger from this episode.

We give a lot of bhaav to stuff we're getting to know, and in the process ignore stuff we already know very well. We put most of our time, energy and devotion into what we don't have, and end up taking what we have for granted.

And this holds true for people too.

And it's only when they go away from us that we realise what we had.

Finally, the song by Craig David (which I used to loathe once upon a time for some reason) made sense to me.

Real sense.

"You don't miss your water till the well runs dry."

So here, I am, back at the bar. Happy, jumpy. And wiser.

And here's a hug for everyone I know through this blog.

And here's a bigger hug for those I know a little too well.