Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Rhyme and reason

Xena has finally finished her homework given by Mom-Bhai -- that of writing down ten nursery rhymes. Here they are:

Twinkle twinkle little star
I have entered mommy's bar
I will charge hafta so high
Her bewdas will cry and cry!

Baa baa new bewda
Have you any hafta?
The bar now has cover charge
which I will take rafta rafta!

Baby Xena
Yes Papa!
Charging hafta?
No Papa!
Open your fist, what are you hiding?
*Opens fist* Ka-ching ka-ching!

Pussy cat pussy cat
Where have you been?
I have been to the bar
And then an ATM machine.
Pussy cat pussy cat
What did you do there?
I paid hafta at gunpoint
If you're going there, beware!

Little Miss Xena
Was having her dinner
Of spicy pani puri
Along came a bewda
And eyed her dinner, aha
So she crushed him in fury.

Little Bo Peep
Has lost all sleep
'Cos Xena took all her sheep
As the hafta was too steep.

Humpty Dumpty sat on Xena's wall
No wonder they got into a brawl
All of mommy's bewdas
And all of mommy's bouncers
Couldn't put Humpty together at all.

Hickory Dickory Dock
A punch, a kick, a sock
Xena struck only one
And that too in fun
But all of the gundas ran away in shock.

I hear thunder
A bigtime gunda
Oh do you, oh do you?
Dhishoom dhishoom punches
Dhishoom dhishoom punches
'Cos she knows kung-fu.

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To meet the Bhai's daughter
Both fell down
And left the town
After watching the scene of slaughter.



26 comments:

Life Begins said...

OMG - thats awesome creativity!
Brilliant!
I can imagine her singing these in her nursery class and teacher fainting ;)

Anonymous said...

wah! wah!
It beats all the rhymes we've ever learnt.. :)

Nidhi said...

Gold, Silver and Bronze! Awesome rhymes Sayesha...the bar welcomes this lil gundi whole heartedly :)

nidhi said...

Super awesome stuff Sayesha!!!

the.orchestra.of.life said...

hahahaaha ..... rofl ... bhai hadh hi ho gayi creativity ki to !

Angelsera said...

an add on created by my husband:

Xena bar ki rani hai
hafta vasooli uski karastani hai
haath lagao maar daalegi
bar se bahar nikalegi

Angelsera said...

awesome twist to the rhymes, superb creativity. Hats off to Xena :D

How do we know said...

Sayesha.. all i can say is, I LOVE YOU!! i do i do i do.. and everytime i think of u.. during the day, or whenever, trust me, only one song plays in my head AUTOMATICALLY.. like really.. like the Yash Chopra and the Poonam Dhillon movies where the heroine is in the mandir and suddenly the bells ring and one song appears pronto - that kind of automatic.. its always the same song.. sung always the same way.. no kidding.. wanna know what the song is? "I believe in angels, I DO I DO I DO!" (That I do, i do is sung at 800 db in the head)

Kanan said...

Xena rocks, Xena rocks,
Yes, she rocks all the way.
Oh! what fun it is to read
all nursery rhymes that she sings.
(to be sung on the tunes of Jingle Bells)

Here's some more ;)

Old Mommy Darling had a bar, EE-I-EE-I-O.
And in that bar she had some bewdas, EE-I-EE-I-O.
With a drink drink here and a drink drink there
Here a drink, there a drink, everywhere a drink drink
Old Mommy Darling had a bar, EE-I-EE-I-O.

Tiny Lil Xena took over the bar, EE-I-EE-I-O.
In the bar she started hafta-vasooli, EE-I-EE-I-O.
With a charge charge here and a charge charge there
Here a charge, there a charge, everywhere a charge charge
Tiny Lil Xena took over the bar, EE-I-EE-I-O.

ಅಶ್ವಿನಿ/ Ashwini said...

OMG! Sayesha its only you who can come up with such wonderful ideas. Kinda loved all of them but my favorite - pussy cat pussy cat! he he he .. Keep writing dear ..

Sudeep said...

I am sure the ppl visiting here after searching for nursery rhymes will be in for a shock.

And you always manage to keep the best at the last. Always.

I assume Viv and Arun will create a few more in your takkar :)

Arun said...

So as not to disappoint Sudeep:

Nanhi Xena, pudding and pie,
Kicked the boys and made them cry.
When the girls came out to play.
L'il Gundi drove them away!

The Bewdas Review Board declares, based on Mombhai's nursery rhymes (abhi se hi Xena ki homework kar rahi hai! some armtwisting by Xena!) that Xena is the Kick-Boxing Champion even if only in the Infants Ultra Featherweight class :)

The above-referenced BRB also notes that the warrior princess has not yet been acquainted with her super-powers. :)

Bubblegum.... said...

Hi...

i follow your blog since days and i have spent 1 pura day in reading all posts!! ALL my love to you ((mom) and the baby xena!! You are my inspiration to post all my silly PJ fun to serious thinking on the blog!!take care!

G2 said...

Classsic stuff Bhai! and yeah... Po seems to have a solid competition..the new dragon warrior has arrived... Kung-fu Xena ..Yo \m/

Obscure Optimist said...

This was amazing :) I was wondering what if Xena actually recites all these instead of original ones, when she starts her Kindergarten!! :)

Nachu said...

Wow! awesome...
Xena is going to recite this and leave people gaping at her :D

diyadear said...

he he you are too good.. loved them all..

Arun said...

Hey Diddle Diddle!
A punch in the middle,
Dizzy and ready to swoon!
Xena giggled to see such fun,
(And only three months old in June!)

Obscure Optimist said...

Hi Sayesha,
This comment is totally unrelated to your blogpost (I have already commented about that).I do not know how to contact you personally, so I thought I better put a comment here. I really really want to thank you for creating such a wonderful bar. Whenever I am depressed I kinda reiterate what you said in one of your posts "We just need to make a bigger deal of the happy stuff", and it makes me feel so good! When my friends ask me, why are you sulking, I have nothing to tell them, but when they ask me, why are you so happy after a serious trough, I tell them, "I'd been to the bar". They don't quite get it, but warn me, "Bewdi mat ban jaana yam".
Ab kya batau, aapke bar me aake, Sayesha, Bewde toh hum ban gaye.
This is such a happy place. I feel so good after reading your archives. It reminds me that my problems are really small as compared to the others.
You have inspired me so much, and I have realised, I keep coming back to the bar whenever I feel down.
Orange juice pi kar talli hone kya hota hai... ye koi mujhse puchhe!! :D

Thanks a ton, I really mean it :)
Lots of love,
Yamini

nits said...

lol.... :)

How do we know said...

Dear Mombhai.. pls return and respondez.. we miss u.

Sayesha said...

Life Begins,
Thank you. :P LOL @ teacher fainting! :D :D :D

babble2blabber,
Thanks. :D

Nidhi,
Thanks. :D

nidhi,
Thank you! :D

the.orchestra.of.life,
:P

Angelsera,
Hahaha! Please thank him for me. :D

How do we know,
Hehehehe... I like the Yash Chop and Poonam Dhill analogy. :D Thank you for all the love! :D

Kanan,
LOL! Aaj sab bewde shaayar ho gaye hain! :P

Ashwini,
Thanks! I like the pussy cat one too! Hehehe! :P

Sudeep,
//I am sure the ppl visiting here after searching for nursery rhymes will be in for a shock.

Hadn't thought of that! ROFL! :D

Arun,
Hehehe... see bewdas also have their own bewdas! :D Hilarious poem, and very apt! :D And I am ROFL-ing at "Infants Ultra Featherweight class"! :D

me!!!!!
Thank you! :)

G2,
Hahahaha! :D

Yamini,
Hahaha! Hope not! Teacher mere baare mein kya sochegi!! :O

nachu,
Hahaha! :D

diyadear,
Thanks. :)

Arun,
3 months?? Wowowowow... time sure flies... but I am going to consider her medical age -- she turned 6 weeks old yesterday. :)

Yamini,
Thank you so much for your kind words. :) The bar has been my happy place for years now, and I am really happy to know that the bewdas also find this a a happy place.
PS: Btw, you can always drop me a line at my email address (on my profile page). :)

nits,
:D

How do we know,
I am here!! I am here!! Don't touch that dial, SSSK is on her way!! :P

Shekhar said...

Hi Sayesha,

Read your blog today after ages.

Obviously, very excited about the baby. Super duper congratulations!! :) ~I swear I can't stop smiling knowing that you're a mom now~

Also read the 3 part blog about the complications and all. Must say it was a brilliant read and I felt very proud of you and Viv.

God bless and I'm sure your baby will be absolutely fine.

Lots of love to the three of you,
Shekhar

P.S. iTunes threw up 'Mere angene mein' from Laawaris and I couldn't help but imagine you singing that to Baby Xena. :P

How do we know said...

Bhai, post na... how will we manage without ur posts? wahhhhhh.. the last happy spot on earth.. ENDANGERED.. NOT.

Somya said...

Brilliant!

CRD said...

Allow me to chip in...

Ahem ahem...here goes..

Hickory Dickory Dock
Mouse-bhai Approached the Croc
The Croc paid none
The Mouse yelled out
Poor croc is still in shock!

Woah...that was some mean stuff. Wonder if she's read this :P

Anyway, here's inviting you to join my orkut community for bloggers. Its called BLOGGERATTI. It completed 3 years recently, and has more than 500 members. It used to be active some time back, but is now a lil dormant(thank FB for killing orkut). I'm trying to revive it.

Do take a look at the threads on the forum to see how organised it is. Also, it is spam free and each member is invited after a bkground check (blog check).

Here's the link. Hope to see you join. Would be glad if you could recommend the same to your blogger frnds too :)

http://www.orkut.com/Community.aspx?cmm=51446226

Btw, theres a community on FB as well, so you can join it in case uve left orkut for good. It goes by the same name - BLOGGERATTI.

Cheers
CRD
www.scriptedinsanity.blogspot.com