Word War II

"Then I figured that saving my wicket was crucial in this match. So I played slowly and steadily... a few big hits in the slog overs... and that was it - won by 7 runs! Close one!" Viv exclaimed gleefully.

He was not narrating the outcome of the last cricket match he played. He was gloating over how he kicked my ass at Scrabble. Again.

Hmmph! As if I wasn't there.

Okay, firstly, there is no "again" because obviously he cheated the first time. We all know that. If there's any 'again', it's only after this: He cheated. Again.

So we're in the middle of the game (I'm winning. Obviously.) when he asks seriously, "Would you allow the word 'MUSLIM'?"

I furtively scan the Scrabble board, an action very helpful before answering any such 'loaded' question. There is no visible opportunity to make the word 'MUSLIM'.

So I give an objective answer, "Err... yeah, I guess so..."

"But it doesn't sound like a valid Scrabble word..." He ponders.

"Well, would you say the word 'CHRISTIAN' is a valid word?" I ask.

"Yeah, sure." He says.

"Well, there you go. Equality of religions and all that." I say wisely.

"Hmmm..."

"But why are you asking?" I ask, still acting neutral.

"Because of..." he pauses to make the word 'JAIN'.

"...this." He completes his sentence.

"JAIN? Huh? Dude! That's not allowed!"

"Well, equality of religions and all that." He grins and merrily adds 24 points to his score.

Hmmph!

















His next word is 'BI'.

"What the...?!" I exclaim.

"What?" He asks innocently.

"That's not a word!"

"Of course it is."

"It's not! It's a prefix, not a word."

"It's a word!"

"Well, can you make a sentence with 'BI'?"

"Of course!"

"Not using it as a prefix, but as a word?"

"Yeah!"

"Well..?"

"She's BI." He grins.

"WHAT???!!"

"What?"

"That's nonsense!!!"

"It's not. Anyone would understand that."

"Well, I won't allow it."

"But Scrabulous does!"

I thunked my head on my hypothetical wall for telling him a few days ago about how riled up I was that Scrabulous allowed 'BI'.

Sheesh! :/

There was also this time he attempted to make the "word" - FLEXTHIZ for 87 points.

"What the heck is FLEXTHIZ????" I asked.

He rolled up his T-shirt sleeve, pointed to his biceps, grinned and said, "FLEXTHIZ."

:|

Was it a mere coincidence that at the end of the game, I was left with only a 'U', which seemed to belong right under the 'F' on the board?


I may have been at a loss for words at Viv's shameless cheating, but my Scrabble letters sure knew how to speak for me.










And that's how he "won" by 7 runs... err... points.

This was just a league match, my friend. Wait till we get to the Word Cup Finals.

Then we'll see who does the slogging and who does the flogging. :/