Monday, September 19, 2005

The unbalanced equation

When I was in school, I loved to balance chemical equations. But I wasn't always good at it. In fact, in the beginning, I was pretty bad.

My chemistry teacher adored me and would not settle for anything less than making me master everything he knew. And that included balancing chemical reactions.

"Sorry Sir, I can't seem to balance this one." I would cry out in despair.

"Sayesha, you're not trying hard enough!"

"But I can't balance this one, Sir!"

"Yes, you can!"

"Sir, look, it is almost balanced."

"There's no 'almost balanced' in a chemical reaction." He would glare. "It should balance exactly."

"Maybe there's something wrong, Sir. This one can't be balanced."

"It can always be balanced. Always. Understand?"

"But Sir, this one's way off!"

"Don't give me excuses. And don't be afraid of experimenting. Don't limit the number of moles you think can be added to balance it."

"I've done the best I could. Can't I just do the best I can, Sir?"

"There's no 'best I can do'. It's always exact, Sayesha. Always exact."

With time and his incredible patience and reprimands, one fine day I became the champ of balancing equations. I had figured out that there was always a trick to doing it. And it was always possible.

In chemistry, yes.

In life, no.

No matter how much you try, sometimes it just doesn't balance.

The person you miss may not miss you as much.

The person you love may not love you as much.

You may not mean as much to the person as he does to you.

And there's no way you can balance the equation. No matter how many moles you add to your side, no matter how hard you try, the equation does not balance.

Because you cannot add or subtract moles on the other side.

You can only try and do the best you can with your side of the equation.

Because this is real life. And in real life, equations do not always balance. Because they don't have to. We just do the best we can.

And that's okay.

Isn't it, Sir?

Do aur do ka jod hamesha chaar kahan hota hai...
Soch samajh waalon ko thodi nadaani de maula...

("Two and two don't always add up to four...
Lord, give the wise ones some naivety...")


PuNeEt said...

me first..

PuNeEt said...

almost balanced
lolzzzzz ;-)

No matter how much you try, sometimes it just doesn't balance
Oohhh that is so true... :-)>

Two and two don't always add up to four
yes in real life they don't add up to 4...

Awesome post dear...
the way you related the chemistry equation to the real life...
just too good...


Anonymous said...

life is a non-homogenous differential equation of Nth degree…that’s how complicated it is. :-

damn..i saw the post 30 min back and it had 0 replies...but was struck up with work... so technically iam first!! :)

Bhavesh said...

wat did uve for breakfast today..?? sooo much of eye opening gyan..!! great post..!! am amazed.!!

Abi said...

so what brought this on?

kaps sent me ur way & I loved ur blog so much that I spent all my weekend spare time reading EVERY post!

Sayesha said...

Hey, thanks! :)

Naah, Puneet was first! :)
And how come you're suddenly sounding nice? All right, out with it -- kya chahiye? :D

Haha! Eye-opening gyan it seems :P
Thanks :)

Thanks! :)
ps: Wow, you actually read thru everything? That's like what -- almost 200 posts?? Gotta hand it to you -- you have patience! :)

Anonymous said...

There is a master chemist, who can balance any equation in life.
Things may be out of our control, but not out of his.
This is REAL and not just philosophical as it sounds.

Sayesha said...

Ok guys I am completely FREAKED OUT!!!

I got an sms message and it was from this same chemistry teacher!!!!!!!! He just got my number through a long chain of people. I called him up and spoke to him just now! It's been 7 years since I saw him last, and out of all days, I had to speak to him on the day I blogged about him!!


Bhavesh said...


u must be real famous at school.. u call your old princi on teachers day.. and now u talk to your old chemistry teacher..!! hmmm.. no wonder your blog is one of my favorites too..!!!

patiala pataka said...

Sayesha I'm the chemistry teacher...hahaha (evil laugh)

patiala pataka said...

Anyway sayesha why the hell are your teachers always rininging you up? Can't they forget you or something? Were you that hot in class? hehe...shama karna just trying to be a MAC!!

Kaala Kavva said...

so true...

we try our best but we cant get absolutely what we want out of someone...

Anonymous said...

//And how come you're suddenly sounding nice?

bacchiyon ko manane ke liye kya kya karna padta hai :00:

ur chemistry teacher smsed u today..thats wow...

Manish Kumar said...

What a Great Post Sayesha!
loved every word of it :)

Nice to know that ur Chemistry teacher called u!

Adi Oso-Groot Finch said...

lovely analogy. life seems already lost for a poor fellow like me who couldn't even balance the equations in chemistry, let alone life's equations! :)

pingoo said...

Interesting analogy :).

" Anyway sayesha why the hell are your teachers always rininging you up? "

lol !! even I was wondering...I know you are "that girl" but still :).

Sayesha said...

Ok I have no idea what you're talkin' about, man.

Thanks :)

#Pat Pat,
// Sayesha I'm the chemistry teacher...hahaha (evil laugh)

Nice try, PP.

//Can't they forget you or something?

Hamein bhoolna itna aasaan nahin hai, PP! hahaha (evil laugh).

#Ze chapaater,
Welcome to Sayeshaz :)
And yes, we can't get others to feel what we feel, but I feel we should not stop ourselves from feeling what we feel.
(Gosh, that's way too many 'feel's in one sentence!)

Tune mujhe bachi bola?? Just because Virdi has disappeared, I become the kid now??

Thanks :)

Dude I hope you figured out that-which-shall-not-be-mentioned-here. :)

Kya karein, I'm unforgettable yaar! Muahahaha! :D

Anonymous said...

Sayesha, i was talking abt God.
He has done that in my life and he can do it for every one, as he has no favorites.

BTW, how come you decided i'm a guy?

Sayesha said...


I'll have to disagree here. Maybe you're talking about one person. But I believe that we love or miss different people to different degrees. And it's just not possible for each of them to love or miss us back to the exact degree that we do.

But the good thing is -- that's okay. 'Cos if everything was perfectly balanced, life wouldn't be what we know it as.

And oh, I did not "decide you were a guy". I use the word "man" (along with many other words) irrespective of gender.

Sayesha said...

And oh, if you got so offended at being called "man", maybe next time you should leave your name behind? So that I don't make such (*oooh shudder*) "mistakes"? :)

'Cos you really can't blame me if you're gonna use an anonymous nickname, you see :)

Casablanca said...

I wish it could be balanced... one-way love is just not fair eh

Chandra said...

hmm...the connect ws gud...btw..have not deleted my blog :)

Anonymous said...

I'm amazed at the depth of your thoughts and your ability to relate concepts.

Anish said...

aila....what an awesome post !!!...thou shall visit this blog everyday now :-)

Anonymous said...

Chemical Equations

A brilliant Analaogy!

That was 1 of the torture I went through in da good years of my life.

Talking abt balancing life like those equations, Will we not lose the surprise element in life by just having those balancing acts?



rimjhim said...

Beautifully written.....!!

"kabhee kisee ko mukkmmal jahan nahin milta...
kahin jameen to kahin aasman nahin milta"

"tere jahan me aisa nahee kee pyaar nahee...
jahan ummmed hai lekin vahan nahee milta"

there is a challenge...a sense of ourself...when we learn to live with these unbalenced equation!!!!!

there is completeness in life's uncompleteness....!!!

And i love life this way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oxymoron said...

well as they say, life is an unbalanced equation!

//The person you miss may not miss you as much

Ever thought, u might be the one on the other side of this equation... i.e. u not missing someone who misses u dearly, u not loving someone who loves u dearly!

we all just hope, that we dont end up that way, not acknowledging someone's feelings / emotions!

life is but a conundrum! an unbalanced equation! make sure to be on the right side of it! the one which gives more than it receives!

Phoenix said...

but the fun of life, perhaps, lies in the unbalanced equation...

when one's need is greater than the other, when things don;t match, and then, u stand naked, alone, ashamed, bereaved in the sharp x-ray vision of a cold pair of eyes. It hurts, so does life.
but life is like that, and it's fun

Ravi said...

I agree. I say as Javed Jaffrey said in Salaam Namaste "Ejjactly".

Read this Beautiful Inequality for my views.

Aah those everlasting lyrics from Aahista Aahista always strike a chord with me. Thank You.

Bonatellis said...

when i was in school i liked to balance on the see-saw ... when i was in college i like to balance the balance-sheet ... now i try to balance my life :-)

it's all a big never-ending balancing act (A)

Sayesha said...

//one-way love is just not fair eh

But more often than not, that's what happens, isn't it?

Thanks :)

Thanks man! :)

Haila, Sayesha is honoured! :)

Well said. It's the unbalanced acts that give life its flavour.

//"tere jahan me aisa nahee kee pyaar nahee...
jahan ummmed hai lekin vahan nahee milta"

I LOVE those lines!

//Ever thought, u might be the one on the other side of this equation... i.e. u not missing someone who misses u dearly, u not loving someone who loves u dearly!

Been there. :(

True. Life hurts. But it's sweet pain.

Thanks for the citation on the blog. Honoured :)


Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

I agree.....

Anonymous said...

In real life, equations may not balance locally. However, they do balance globally.

You may not miss someone as much as that someone misses you.

You may not love someone as much as that someone loves you.

Someone may not mean as much to you as you do to him/her.

Minal said...

Hey Sayesha,
It's indeed very difficult to balance the reactions and actions in the chemistry of life.
Lovely post:-)

virdi said...

arnold style : i am bach life, mane zindagi; aap se kya chahati hai, kaun janta hai.. koi bhi nahi... aur aap zindagi se kya chahate ho, yeh toh WOH bhi nahi jaanta :-)
pesh hai aapki khidmat mein ek sher, Ghalib ka...
aah ko chahiye aik umr asar ho-nay tak
kaun jeeta hai teri zulf kay sar ho-nay tak.

makes sense to the post.. thoda bhari sher hai...

Sahil said...

Kya baat hai yaar.

Did anyone ever tell you that you write from your heart? If they did, they were right. Jabh aap dil se likhte ho na, my heart smiles.


(and I've got a huge backlog of your posts to go through. And so many comments! Will do so when I get some time, right now things are kinda crazy. Lagta hai mere absence mein aap ki fan club bhad gayi hai. Or perhaps they're taking advantage of the fact that I ain't around. Enjoy karlo bache log, thore din aur ki baat hai....)

White Light said...

how true is this !?!?! wonderful post, always "spot on"...

Sayesha said...


I wrote about that too in an earlier comment. But you know what? Perhaps it still doesn't balance. 'Cos it doesn't have to.

Thanks :)

Aa gaya na chup chap raste pe?? Hehehe... I was wondering where you were! :)

Heyyyy! Someone's back!!! :) Aap aaye bahaar aayi. Missed you, man.

//Jabh aap dil se likhte ho na, my heart smiles.

Jab aap dil se comment karte ho na, my dil goes hmmm... :)

(ps: As you can see, I am in a good mood, so I won't do the usual insult-Sahil routine tonight. Enjoy it, dude. It won't last.)

Thanks :)

Anonymous said...

And there's no way you can balance the equation. No matter how many moles you add to your side, no matter how hard you try, the equation does not balance.

sayasha, equations do balance.
You forgot that you can reduce the moles on your side too. Painful, but sometimes it has to be done.

Sayesha said...

//You forgot that you can reduce the moles on your side too.

Yes, you can. But guess what? By the time you do that, you discover that the number of moles on the other side of the equation has also changed.

And that's how it is.

But it doesn't matter. Who says life's equations must be balanced anyway? You love more, you love less, doesn't matter. What matters is that you love.

Sudeep said...

very true..

yaar tu toh pehle thoda senti aur short posts likhti thi..:D
sorry couldnt control myself not to say tht :)

Unknown said...

Kya Sayesha..

I'd thought il have a nice laugh thru this post too but aapne to...!!! But very well said, after all you can only control your life, not someone else's and thats what called a 'compromise' :)

As for the first part of your post, I better stay quiet coz I accept I am a CD :P

Take care,

Sayesha said...

Sahi bola re... senti cycle is coming back I think :P

Zor ka jhatka dheere se lage! ;)

Bhavya said...

Some things in life will always remain unbalanced. I think those things keep life interesting.