Madhubala

After the assault on the ears with the new 'Chura ke dil mera', I was SO thankful to randomly discover this song by Amit Trivedi and Neeti Mohan. Been playing it on loop for days now. Xena is going to disown me if I don't change the song. So I figured the only way to get this song out of my head is to pour it into yours. 

You're welcome.

PS: Here is the original if you prefer it in Amit Trivedi's voice. 

The thinking cap

It happened some time last year.

I saw a tiiiiiny plant peeking from my compost pile. Now I had put all sorts of kitchen scraps in there so I had absolutely no clue what plant it was. I gently pulled it out and planted it in a pot, hoping that it was a green chilli plant. I'd been trying to grow green chillies from seeds and had proven myself to be a total failure. Or in the words of monk Jianyu, "pre-successful".

I watered it and the plant grew. And I watered it some more and it grew some more. Unlike my cherry tomato plants Tommy, Timmy, Tammy and Tom, who were sprouting flowers by the dozen, this plant, unwilling to reveal its identity, had nothing but leaves. Xena, frustrated at not being able to name it, asked me to do so and so I named it 'Wildcard'.

Weeks passed by. Nothing but leaves. So I decided to call in the expert. My dad, who has grown everything from ginger procured from an unwilling tour guide in Bali to coconuts found washed ashore at Singapore's east coast beach.

I interrupted my family WhatsApp chat group, which is mostly kept alive by mom forwarding us forwards and asking me to check if they are legit. My favourite is this one:

तुलसी के दो पत्ते मोबाइल के पीछे कवर मे रखे रहेने से मोबाइल का रेडिएशन एक दम चला जायेगा।
प्रैक्टिकल कर के दिखाया बाबा राम देव

Wow. Just... wow.

Anyway, I sent them Wildcard's photo.

Me: Dad, what plant is this? It grew from my compost pile. I can’t identify it. Hoping for it to be chilli.

Dad: Wait for some time; if chillies appear, it is so!

Me: This advice is not useful at all!

Mom: I don't think it's chilli. Maybe capsicum. 

Sister: Send for dna testing????

Me:

Anyway, fast-forward several months. I was out on the balcony plucking Tommy's latest offerings to make veggie uttapams, when I spotted something on Wildcard that made me do a double take. 

HOLY. MOLY. 

Ladies and gentlemen, Wildcard finally has a name! Please say 'hello' to 'CAPtain'. 

(And yes, mom, you're a genius. Please just stop forwarding the forwards.)

Cokehead

I have been a fan of Coke Studio Pakistan since... forever. I don't remember what my initiation song to CSP was, but I remember my first thoughts: "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS? WHY IS THIS SOOOO GOOOOOD?"

Strangely, over the last few years, I've not kept myself updated on CSP. However, last week, this link popped up on my FB feed, and I couldn't help but click on it and then go on to listen to every single song listed there. Memories came rushing back, and I went straight to Youtube and listened to every song from Season 9. I went completely bonkers over Shamaan Pai Gaiyaan (soooo refreshing to see Rachel Viccaji get out of her backing vocalist seat and own the song like a boss!) and Uddi Ja (Uddi Ja initially took up a 3D2N residence in my head but now it's refusing to vacate!), playing them on loop all day long, until Xena protested, "Mama, I need to fill my head with other songs. Your songs have gone inside!"

(I know, right?)

Eventually, I stumbled upon 'Khaki banda' and after about two listens, I got the exact feeling that I'd got when I'd heard my first CSP song. "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS? WHY IS THIS SOOOO GOOOOOD?"

No, seriously. The lyrics, the music, the emotions, the singing (especially Ahmed Jahanzeb's voice -- HOW CAN ANYONE SING SOOOO WELL??? HOWWW???) -- it's the kind of stuff that can leave you goosebumpy and teary-eyed at the same time.

Viv didn't get why I loved the song so much, so I tried to explain to him how meaningful and humbling the lyrics are and how the song is about our ego and how we simply have no right to think of ourselves as highly as we do yada yada yada. He nodded along apprehensively, and I said, "I mean, the song title itself -- khaaki banda... is so deep and meaningful. Wait, you know what 'khaaki banda' means, right?"

"Of course," He said. "Policeman."

Okay, where's a pillar when you need it badly to thunk your head on?

Anyway, good things must be shared, so here you go -- be mesmerised by this mind-blowing piece of sheer musical genius. (Make sure the CC option is on, so you can get the lyrics AND the translation.)

Beat that

Usually, I like to play music on Saavn or Youtube while I work. And since I work from home, I can really play loud, blaring music. There are no colleagues to annoy. (Except the one found in the full-length mirror on my wardrobe next to my desk. For the most part, she furiously types away, hard at work just like me, but I have to admit, sometimes even she turns to give me judgemental looks on my taste.)

So I was looking for something to play yesterday, when in a very timely manner, my sis-in-law sent me a Youtube link to a song. The title was 'The Chainsmokers - Closer | Kabira (ft. Casey Breves) (Vidya Vox Mashup Cover)'.

I clicked on it.

Gaaaahhhh.

No, it wasn't a virus. It was worse.

Okay, so first things first. There are some things I disapprove of rather strongly. I can't get my head around why they exist, why someone would do something like that.

Selfies.

Vodka pani puri (it's an insult to vodka and pani puri).

Remixes. DJ XYZ mixes.

Random English lyrics in Hindi songs. Yo baby. Let's party. Oh girl.

Words like mashup, cover, feat/ft.

It was therefore a very disorienting experience for me when I found myself actually liking the song she had sent. I actually liked it. I LOVE the song Kabira and here I was, NOT hating this mashup/mix-up/feat/cover version of it. Grrr...

Who was this Vidya and why was she Vox and why she did she look so familiar (my best guess is Vaani Kapoor before she got plastic surgery + Nigaar Khan) and why why why oh why was I liking this song?

While I was trying to get my head around what had just happened to my entire belief system, the next song autoplayed. And though normally I don't keep the screen with the songs open when I'm working, I simply had to stop everything and find out what was going on and who on earth was playing the tabla so impossibly well. The beats were slaying me. Even my colleague in the mirror stopped and gaped.

Good things must be shared. Here it is.

Suffer, my fellow humans. This song will not leave you.

U is for Urdu

I absolutely adore the Urdu language. I believe that there is no language that even comes close to being as poetic as Urdu is. When I was a kid, my mom was the proud owner of a lot of ghazal cassettes. It does seem a little surprising now because frankly speaking, her Urdu was and is quite hopeless. She didn't understand a word of it, but she listened to ghazals all the time because of how soothing and melodious they sounded.

I, on the other hand, was more into the lyrics of the ghazals that were constantly playing at home. Of course, back then, there was no Google and so there was no way to find out what the lyrics meant. I had a Muslim friend in school, but she used to get very stressed whenever I'd ask her something like, "So what's the difference between ikhtiyar, ibtida, intehaa, imtihaan, istakbal and inteqal?" The look on her face translated into, "Please stop. We don't talk like that. Nobody talks like that."

So I stopped asking her. I'd write down the lyrics and try and figure out the meaning based on the bigger picture. Then I'd encounter the same words in another ghazal, which helped to either prove or disprove my hypothesis about what the word meant. Over time, I had quite a solid grasp of the language, especially the poetic parts that featured in songs. When I travelled to Pakistan, my knowledge of Urdu came in very handy. I was accepted instantly everywhere I went, and even though it was a business trip, it truly was one of my most memorable travel experiences.

Even in Bollywood songs, I could feel a stronger inclination towards those that featured Urdu poetry. Of course, now you don't get a lot of those because baby doll is sone di, and uski desi look pe mar gaye gore gore chhokre. However, there are still some new songs which I do enjoy, and lately they've been mostly songs of Arijit Singh. I suppose he gets picked for such songs, because his voice quality really does justice to poetry. I was listening to his song 'Jiya' from 'Gunday' some time ago, and I made a discovery. I'd heard it a couple of times before and each time I'd thought these were the lyrics:

Ishq ka tu haraf 

Jiske chaaron taraf 

Meri baahon ke ghere ka 

Baney aashiyan

It roughly translates into this: You're the letter (letter as in letter of the alphabet) of love, around which my arms make a home.

But when I was listening to it this time, I realised it was not 'aashiyan' ('home'). It was 'haashiya' ('margin', as in the margin on a piece of paper). The beauty of using 'haraf' and 'haashiya' together without compromising the rhythm or melody, and the analogy of her as the 'haraf' and his arms as the 'haashiya' blew me away.

However, I didn't know whom I could share this very random joy with. Viv would just look at me blankly. After all, he's the one who thought the solution to the problem in the ghazal 'Dard jab teri ataa hai, toh gila kisse karein?' was 'water'. So I was compelled to blog about this, so that readers far and wide can read this, shake their heads and go, "Say what?"

Jokes aside, if you like Urdu poetry and Bollywood, you must-must-must listen to 'Jiya' for the amazing poetry of Irshad Kamil (he has a PhD in Urdu poetry omg) and the soulful voice of Arijit Singh.

Singing praises

So I rediscovered 'Teri deewani' from Kailash Kher's album Kailasa on Youtube and was amazed at how quickly I had dismissed it the first time I had heard it. Further research on what else he has been upto led me to his album 'Kailasa Chaandan mein', particularly the songs 'Teri yaad mein' and 'Chaandan mein' which have completely blown my mind and made me into a total zombie.

Picture this.

I wake up and as soon as I brush my teeth, I play the album. When I go to bathe, I actually pause it because otherwise I'm, you know, wasting and offending the song. It's only when the first burst of water hits me in the shower that I realise how ridiculous I am being. And yet I do the same thing the next morning. The album plays as I get ready for work, and I wait till the last possible second before shutting off the computer and leaving the house, till the bus driver is almost pounding on my door and saying, "Eh hello? You want to go to work or no?" As soon as I lock the house, I take out the ipod from my purse and play the album. I play it in the bus amidst all the cacophony and for the first time find it really silly and annoying that the buses have TVs. The kid who has been squashed against the window has said, "Excuse me" 37 times, but I am too lost in the song to notice him or give way so he can get off at his bus stop. Finally he pushes himself out, giving me the eye of shame for standing between him and his education.

I reach office and as soon as I turn on my computer, I go to www.phulki.com and play the album. On loop. The whole day. I just put the earphones right next to my keyboard and turn up the volume all the way so I don't have to plug the earphones but I can still hear the song without disturbing others. Of course, once in a while, someone comes to talk to me and catches a bit of the song. Just yesterday, my teammate came over and as soon as she had uttered "Sayesha, do you have a minute?" Kailash Kher went "Aawo jiiii, aawo jiiii, aaaaawo jiiiiiii!" in a very hospitable manner, and I chuckled so hard at how relevant it was (if she knew Hindi) that I think I scared the poor girl.

After work, I shut down my computer and leave for home with the ipod back on. In the lift, just before I hit play, I try to remember where exactly I had left the song in the morning. Usually I guess correctly and the song resumes from the next word, making me grin so widely that the security guard in my office building gets nervous and gives me the, "Who are you? Wipe that grin off your face or.. or I'll open fire!" look, while I give him the "Dude I work here. And you don't have a gun. And you should totally listen to this song!" look.

The bus journey home is again musical, and sometimes I sing along in my head so loudly that people actually turn to stare, even though I swear not a single word left my lips. Power of music I tell you.

I come home and I play it till I am ready to sleep. On an unrelated note, two of my neighbours have moved out. On another unrelated note, Viv has moved out and checked into a hotel. (Okay this one is actually unrelated. He has gone for a tournament and is staying at the hotel with all the teams.)

And at night, just before I sleep, because I have heard the song a few hundred times in the day, it plays again in my head. Every note, every tone, every bit is clear as crystal as I drift off to sleep.

Whatever this is, I know it won't last, but I'm going to savour every moment till I have it.

Obsession of the month

Starting a new label at the bar -- obsession of the month. I don't know how to embed audio, so I'm embedding the video, but I couldn't care less about it. In fact, the video may ruin the song for you -- the singer kinda looks like a cross between Emraan Hashmi and Himesh Reshammiya.

Close your eyes and listen... just listen...

Confession about obsession

Song name: Bheegi bheegi si
Singer: James
Movie name: Gangster
Song duration: 5 mins and 43 seconds = 343 seconds

Date: 2nd May 2006

6:00 am - Alarm rings. I wake up. I try and remember where I am. I go to computer and put the song on loop as I brush, shower, get dressed for work, make and have breakfast.

6:05 am to 6:55 = 50 minutes = 3000 seconds
8.75 times

7:00 am - I put the song on loop on the ipod and start walking from home towards the train station. I take the train and then a bus to work.

7:00 am to 8:05 am = 65 minutes = 3900 seconds
11.37 times

8:15 am - I settle down at work and put the song on loop on my Mac at work, hoping not to alarm Bananapen, who sits in the next cubicle. The song plays till it's lunchtime.

8:15 am to 12:30 pm = 255 minutes = 15300 seconds
44.61 times

12:30 to 1:30 pm - Lunch hour
2:00 - 3:00 pm - Meeting

I return from my meeting and put the song on loop.

3:00 pm to 6:00 pm = 180 minutes = 10800 seconds
31.49 times

6:15 pm - I put the song on loop on the ipod and start walking from office towards the bus stop. I take a bus and then the train home.

6:15 to 7:30 = 75 minutes = 4500 seconds
13.12 times

7:40 - I enter my room and put the song on loop as I get ready to go to the gym.

7:40 pm - 7:55 pm = 15 minutes = 900 seconds
2.62 times

I come back from gym and put the song on loop loud enough I can hear it from the shower. I have dinner while the song continues to play.

9:00 pm - 10:00 pm = 60 minutes = 3600 seconds
10.50 times

10.00 pm - I add the song to my winamp window thrice, turn off 'repeat' mode, and tuck myself into bed. I have no memory of when I fell asleep.
3 times

In one day I had heard a song 125.46 (correct to two decimal places) times.

Now that, my friend, is obsession.