Start the bawl rolling

As Starbreez and I found our way to our seats in the movie theatre last night, we wondered if we would cry. We had been warned that U, Me aur Hum was best accompanied by a packet of tissue. "I hope I haven't turned cynical, man!" She whispered to me before the movie started. I knew exactly what she meant. When a movie makes you cry, you kinda feel more alive, assured that you have not lost touch with the human side of things. If a really sad movie doesn't make me sad... now that is really sad. Oh the irony.

In a world where we are constantly telling ourselves to be emotionally stronger and not to allow anyone to make us cry, it's nice to be able to connect on that level with total (and fictional) strangers.

So the movie didn't make me cry. Yes, tears did well up in my eyes at times, but they were mostly brought about by my yawning (you know how when you yawn, your facial muscles squeeze your lachrymal glands and they secrete tears?). No offence to Ajay Devgan here, it was midnight after all, and my body clock is super accurate. In fact, I think Ajay is absolutely great and I am always impressed by directors who can direct themselves. Can you imagine the turmoil in their heads?

Ajay the actor - *dialogue*
Ajay the director - CUT! That was bad...
Ajay the actor - Huh? Really? I thought it was okay...
Ajay the director - Well, it wasn't. Let's do it again.
Ajay the actor (grumpily) - *dialogue*
Ajay the director - CUT! Perfect.
Ajay the actor - Wait, I think I didn't get the eyes right. Can we do the scene again?
Ajay the director - Huh? What are you talking about?? It was fine!
Ajay the actor - No, it wasn't.
Ajay the director - Yes, it was.
*Kajol rolls her eyes and walks off the set*

The movie wasn't boring, in fact, it was a very well-intentioned story. But the scenes did seem a bit draggy here and there. I have a great movie review system, also known as 'Will I buy the DVD or not?' which is based on a great Q&A system 'Can I watch this movie 10 times or not?' and the movie fell in the second category.

People had told me I'd be bawling in Taare Zameen Par too, but I was totally ho-hum in that as well. I guess several factors contribute to why you will or will not cry in a movie - how much you like the actors/director, how much you connect or identify with the story, the people you go to watch it with, and also your state of mind.

On the way out, we started talking about movies that had made us cry, and I thought I'll list them here. Of course, there are some movies that made me cry in the 'bored me to tears' kind of way, but here I am talking about movies where I actually felt so much emotion that I cried.

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Anjali
I was a kid when I watched this, and this will qualify as the first movie that made me cry. I was horrified when the kid died. Where the heck were Shaktimaan, and Superman and Spiderman and all other superheroes in their stupid costumes? Why didn't they save her? How come a 'good person' died? Died? Like never-gonna-come-back-died? Waaaaaaaa!

Sadma
I'm neither a fan of Sridevi nor Kamal Hasan (*ducks to avoid shoes*) but when I saw the last scene in the movie where he's doing the monkey antics to jog her memory and she, totally failing to recognise him, takes him for some lunatic and throws a banana at him, oh my. Big bawling.

Saransh
Anyone remember the scene where the frustrated father Anupam Kher is asking the customs officer if he can take his son's remains home? That entire scene was so well done, and Kher, only in his late 20s back then, was amazing in his portrayal of a middle-aged retired man.

Akele Hum Akele Tum
We watched this movie in the theatre - Dad, Mom, Grandma and me. Suddenly Dad turned to me and said, "It's raining inside the theatre!" "Huh?" I said, and looked up expecting some kind of leakage from the roof. "No, it's them." He pointed cheekily towards Mom and Grandma, who were both finding their anchals too short to wipe away all the tears. Dad and I chuckled, but my chuckling was short-lived. Remember the scene where Manisha Koirala is taking the kid away, and finds Aamir Khan sobbing hysterically in his room? The curve on my lips completely reversed itself in that scene and my poor Dad had to spend the rest of the movie not with two, but three bawling women. And I didn't even have a frickin' anchal!

Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
Okay, here's the thing - I really like Karan Johar movies. (Except Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna - I didn't like that.) KKHH was the quintessential KJ movie, which had all the elements that a typical Bollywood movie has, including some unbelievable shit that I still try not to roll my eyes at. I can't even remember the number of non-Indians to whom I'd recommended the movie and made them fall in love with Bollywood and Shah Rukh. And I remember how I cried when Kajol cried in the rain during the song 'Tujhe yaad na meri aayi' and also her goodbye scene at the railway station. And also the last scene of the movie.

Filhaal
I also referred to it as the Ganga-Jamuna movie. Because just like these rivers, it was free flow time for my tears. I watched it when I was already sad for some reason I can't remember - perhaps it was the time I was looking for a job and couldn't find any that wasn't engineering-related. It was probably one of the movies where I cried for at least half the duration of the movie.

Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham
This movie was widely touted as the movie that had more Gham (sorrow) than Khushi (joy) - which was actually true. The only so-called Khushi moments had a screaming Kajol annoying the hell out of me and I was so shocked when they gave her the award for the best actress (*ducks to avoid shoes again*). However, there is one little scene in the movie which made me cry - the shoelace scene. Remember when 'Yash' is unable to tie his shoelaces, and Daaijaan helps him, and he protests with a "DJ!" Farida Jalal excelled in that scene when she got up, all teary-eyed and said that she knew it was Rohan all the way. I think I bought the DVD for that one scene.

Doli Saja Ke Rakhna
Another one of those one-scene wonders. The last scene, when Mousumi Chatterji asks Aruna Irani if she can take Jyotika and Aruna Irani cries out, "Toh le jao na!" was so powerfully done. The absolute silence preceding the dialogue, showcasing the discomfort the characters were experiencing with the situation, and this odd outburst between the two women, just made the end totally worth it. The rest of the movie was quite blah, but I bought the DVD for that one scene.

Kal Ho Na Ho
Frankly speaking, I did not cry when I saw this movie in the theatre. It doesn't even feature in my top five movies. But I'd bought the DVD for the amazing SRK-Saif chemistry. My flatmate was on medical leave, and I passed her the DVD before I left for work so she wouldn't get bored. "You may need tissue for this one." I joked. When I came back from work, she was slumped in the chair red-eyed and the movie had been paused. She had just found out about Aman's illness. "You said I'll need tissue, you didn't say I'll need a box of tissue!" She said. "Huh? Really?? That bad?" I asked. "Watch the rest with me, I can't watch it alone." She said. So the two of us watched it together and much to my surprise, I did find myself shedding some tears.

Swades
Frankly, of all his movies, I thought SRK was the best in Swades. Maybe he had some sudden inspiration or Ashutosh Gowarikar didn't let him ham, or whatever - he was totally rocking in that movie and after this movie I actually felt respect for him as opposed to fan-love. Many of my friends cried in the movie, but the one scene that made me cry was when Mohan goes to meet Haridas. Beautifully done.

Lage Raho MunnaBhai
The reason why the MunnaBhai series of movies rank among my top favourites is that the tears are as genuine as the laughter. These movies represent Bollywood and the range of emotions it offers. I laughed my guts out in these movies. And at the same time, I cried my eyes out. Remember that scene where Munna finds Circuit and apologises to him for slapping him? Tears central!

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I guess that's the thing with Bollywood. My reaction to Kramer vs Kramer was nowhere compared to that of Akele Hum Akele Tum. I guess Bollywood really likes to infuse the emotions into the movie with a horse-vaccine-syringe. I can almost imagine the director going, "We HAVE to make the audience cry in this scene! More glycerin! More!" Well, I'm not complaining. I just wish they'd stop the rip-offs.

Okay, I'm done. Whew. So let's start the bawl rolling - which movies made you cry?

And guys, don't just shake your heads and walk away. This question is for you too. Come on, out with the truth. Don't be such men now. ;)