Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Chak de, India!

I am an Indian cricket fan.

I cheer at cricket matches.

I cry at cricket matches.

I yell at cricket matches.

I take leave for cricket matches.

I only watch India's matches.

I don't like test cricket.

After the last World Cup, I don't even like one-dayers.

I love T20.

I could do without the silly cheerleaders though. Get out of the way - there's people who paid good money to watch the match, not your asses! Well, most people anyway.

I glare at people who dismiss the T20 format. T20 is like watching match highlights - every moment is exciting.

As far as I am concerned, T20 is the real World Cup. Those who think T20 is not serious enough, of course it's serious - it's in fact more serious than the one-day World Cup. Mandira Bedi is not there, you see.

I am extremely illogical, irrational and inconsistent as a fan.

I hurl (civil) abuses at my team when they lose.

I write spoof poetry insulting them when they let the country down.

I call them morons.

I love the Indian players. Mostly for their cricket.

I love some of the Pakistani players too, but that's a different kind of love.

I love Brett Lee. And Shane Bond. And Afridi. Not for their cricket though. Ahem.

Every year, I go through a phase when I completely lose interest in it. And then I bounce back. Without fail.

I tell my Singaporean friends how complicated a game cricket is. I exclaim, "You know there are ten ways in which a batsman can get out?" and watch them yawn.

Erm, I don't think I can name all ten ways. Seven or eight maybe.

I prefer watching the match on TV to watching it in the stadium.

I like to see the expressions on the faces of the players.

I am extremely superstitious when it comes to cricket.

I lock myself in my room for five minutes because the last time I went inside my room, Yuvi hit a six.

When Yuvi hits six sixes in an over, I promptly change my facebook status to corny lines like "Sayesha is sending some Yuvi protection to the burnt England team."

I sms the score to people who can't watch the match.

I yell at people who say the matches are fixed.

I don't know everything about the game, but I live with a walking-talking-playing cricket encyclopaedia.

Even though cricket is not big here, I'm proud of Viv for being in the Singapore national team.

I save birthday balloons from Clueless' surprise birthday party "to burst them when India wins the World Cup".

I know India will win the World Cup even before they start playing.

I believe the Indian cricket team was the best entertainer in this series.

I buy two boxes of Danish butter cookies and leave them at the common area in the office with a note 'GO, INDIA!' and send an email to 50 people in the office that says:

Dear all,

Please help yourselves to the butter cookies placed on the shelf next to S’s cubicle – I’m celebrating India’s victory at the finals of the T20 Cricket World Cup last night! Since most of you couldn’t care less about cricket – this is a championship involving teams from Australia, England, New Zealand, South Africa, Sri Lanka, West Indies, Bangladesh, India, Kenya, Scotland, Zimbabwe and India’s arch rivals Pakistan (whom we pulped in the finals last night!). The last time India took the Cricket World Cup home was when I was 3, so you can understand my utterly insane elation.


I get replies to my email from colleagues that go something like this:

Hi Sayesha,

Nope... still don't understand the elation, but I'll take advantage of the butter cookies.


I sing corny songs in my head on the way to work.

Anhoni ko honi kar de, honi ko anhoni
Ek jagah jab jamaa ho teenon
Gambhir... Pathan... aur Dhoni!

India in the finals? Whoa. India in the finals against Pakistan? Double whoa.

What a match. What a dream. What a win.

Last night, after the match, after screaming ourselves silly, the two of us sighed. We wished we were in India. Amidst the celebrations on the streets.
Amidst the firecrackers. Amidst the noise. Amidst the passionate discussions. Amidst our own people. People who know and understand what cricket truly means to us and others like us.

Twenty-four years. It has been a long wait.

We may not be home. But the Cup is.



Cogito said...

Amazing win ! The only thing better than the win is your " Post" .

Suhel said...

Should I be Claiming Silver... :)

I am in India..Saw It.. Loved it...
and the Jallooosh was uncomparable...

Chak De...!!!!

Sandip Chaudhuri said...

8-0 Vs Pak.
What a match, I swear my heart was thumping without control. I swear i never get it that high even on the cross trainer.

Whatever it was an amazing tournament. I prefer tests but t20 t20 is like the gully cricket we played in our childhood. 15-20 overs a side. I must say the intensity is awesome. Can do away with the cheer leaders though. Don't need them for a India Pak match. :D

kashika said...

Jeet gaye.......hum jeet gaye.......

*dancing like er...maniacs*

oh God Sayesha, you shd have been here. Post-match the celebrations were phenomenal. people were dancing on the roads to the tune of 'dhols' like maniacs. And everybody was hugging and congratulating everybody, even strangers. The whole of India was united. it was so cooool...

BTW, congratulations to you and Viv too. Hum jeet gaye...

satish said...

kya gana likha hai bhai.

great match, great post!

Unknown said...

You would have loved to be at my client's office last evening. The common area was packed and the thumps echoing from there would have made an outsider feel like an earthquake was coming on :) It sure is a great feeling that the cup is finally home :) :)

Unknown said...

Great post!

// I am extremely superstitious when it comes to cricket. //
Most of us are!

What a match it was! My heart literally skipped a beat when Misbah Ul-Haq played the last shot........I thought that it's a six........
This match is certainly in my top 10 (top 5 may be)
Great start to Dhoni's career as a captain.

//Anhoni ko honi kar de, honi ko anhoni
Ek jagah jab jamaa ho teenon
Gambhir... Pathan... aur Dhoni!//
That was cheesy :)

I think, 20-20 will replace one-day cricket in some time......tests are here to stay (and rightly so).

sd said...

I did not get to watch the match:( Par I was following it on a website, whose updates got slower towards the end of a match. In the last over, the website showed that Misbah had hit a six. My heart sunk, I was sure ki match haat se nikal gaya...Chetan Sharma/Miandad etc type visions running wild in my mind.... when suddenly I received a call from India... even without picking it up I knew we had won!!! My folks on the phone were like, "Do you hear the crackers going off on the streets"! Wowowowow! Maza-aa-gaya.

BTW: Kya song lyrics hain:)

soleil said...

YAY!!! I didn't get to watch the match but I knew about it the moment India won cos Clueless msged me. It was such a close match! Congrats!

I must say I really enjoyed myself watching the semis with all of you. Can you imagine 7 Indians all trying to talk to me at the same time about cricket?!? Awesome! :p

Anand said...

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Misbah who?
Mis bah five runs!!!

Heh heh :-)

{PS - not an original, i must confess. Got this one on email at work today!)

nycbewda said...

I dont know how many times I had hit F5 and if it doesnt refresh curse Cricinfo guys and if it is slow curse IT guys and in the final moment I couldnt resists buzzed home and call connection was delayed and all I heard was cracker sounds, That's It, Our team just forgot that we were in office. It was gr8 feeling.

Sukhaloka said...


Love the "Amar Akbar Anthony" - India T20 version! :D

manju said...

Awesome post ! Same here, am also not in India, but the joy of India winning, that too against Pak in the Finals, is tremendous :)

Directhit said...

It was an awesome match!! and we were screaming at night 11 in the apartment and hoping that no cops come with complaints from neighbours :p

another sms i saw is this -
'Misbah thought that he is hitting the ball to a place there was no one

But he forgot that there is an Indian in every corner of the world' :p :p

ha ha, the original was that 'a malayalee in every corner of the world' indian also holds true :)

Amit said...

Tusi yeh padho ji...a fwd doing rounds in India

Knock Knock,

Who’s there?


Misbah who?

Mis-bah five runs.

and ya the great game lands another fan...!
Cricket shicket dekhte raho ji...!

Amit said...

ailaa meine toh upar ke comments padhe hi nahi...

the joke has already been posted...!

wat the heck...fir se haslo...!

Lehmunade said...


Adorable Pancreas said...


Sudeep said...

ha ha.. i wrote the opposite on the cheerleaders :p

congrats on the win.. we all were dancing here after the last catch

i shld get hold of viv's id n tell him to lock u up during the entire batting time.. all sixes wah! :D

AAA ka song accha banaya..

Sudeep said...

btw ek mallu frnd ne match khatam hone par mssg kiya
'Misbah thought he sent the ball in no mans land but he forgot tht a mallu is present in every nook n corner of the world'

nice.. lekin i replied to her
'For every one mallu there are 2 sharmas' in the team coz sharmas are everywhere.. space mein bhi'


V said...

Heard an amusing comment...if ODIs are pyjama cricket, T20 is Knickers cricket! Entertaining tho.

creepa said...

Haye!! Kya match tha re!!


And we had a golgappe party yesterday!!yummies!! muahahaha! :D

Shalini Gowrisankar said...

The match was amazing to say the least ! It was so much fun out here after India's win with crackers and Music... But, for sure this wasn't a match for the weak hearted.. What a nail biting finish.. I loved every bit of it.. Way to go!INDIA!

Tarun said...

Yeah India won,

Guess what it feels like when U can come to know who will play whom and win/lose by what margin.
Cricket matching fixing ...... absurd but cannot/must not be ruled out.

Ab said...

7-8???? i can think of 3 proper ways, and 2 extensions of them... oh ya i forgot 'handled the ball'... but still 8?

anyways, hey, Iv put my take on the win on my blog.. check it out!

Directhit said...

speaking of sms forwards for the match - saw this in one rediff comment :)

Abdul Kalam's Wish fullfilled...
India became Super power in 2020

funny :)

Somya said...

Anhoni ko honi kar de, honi ko anhoni
Ek jagah jab jamaa ho teenon
Gambhir... Pathan... aur Dhoni!

Loved ur song...mine's is a very superstitious family when it comes to cricket...so me n my jiju are not allowed to watch any crucial which India plays...coz if watch they are pakka se doomed to lose(not that otherwise they don't)...so this time we were literally thrown out of the living room...it was only when we heard my sister screaming as if house has been put on fire...that we realised that we'ave won but since then I have watched every rerun...lol..chak de India.

Bivas said...

//Anhoni ko honi kar de, honi ko anhoni
Ek jagah jab jamaa ho teenon
Gambhir... Pathan... aur Dhoni!

Heeelaaareeeous :-)

Everytime thr is a crucial match, we kick out our roomie out of the house...superstitious u c...n he gladly accepts the punishment coz at least our team wins dat way (or so it seems)...thr was this one time when he literally had to take his laptop into the kitchen and work from thr coz a match was in progress!!!

10 ways: Bowled, run out, caught, stumped, lbw, handled the ball, timed out, hit wicket, double hit, obstruction
Think I got them all! :D

Chak De! :-)

fee said...

woohooo!! we won...man that was so thrilling...i thought i'd faint in that last over...fingers crossed, toes crossed,breath held...but it was soooo worth it when that almost-six shot became our winning catch :)..
nice to see i'm not the only weirdo with superstitions abt the match..i have to sit cross legged with my left leg over right till i die of cramps..else we'll lose ;) but love it when we win...
nice post...go team india!!! that was true team spirit ....
well well..i'll have one of those butter cookies now please..:)

Anish said...

Nice Post :-)

Priyanka said...

So much fun!

Baawara Mann said...

Nice post.. GO INDIA..

- Sushant

Jina said...

im glad im alive in this year..can boast to my grankids i guess....coz dunno when the next opportune moment is goin to be...
good one!!!..u almost brought tears to my eyes wit ur climax....
not fair sayesha..ur supposd to b makin ppl laugh...[jus kiddin ]

Austin Desi Movie said...

Go guys in blue!!! Great post, Sayesha.

Have you seen this ?

Anusha said...

Bwah. Awesome post. I don't know how I didn't see it all this while.

//I love Brett Lee. And Shane Bond. And Afridi. Not for their cricket though. Ahem.
Oh, I'm totally with you on the "special" love. Ahem.

And OMG, I can't believe the Indian team won against friggin' Australia ON MY BIRTHDAY. Like, best present ever! :P

And then two days later, against Pakistan! Ah, sweet catharsis! :D

And I'm glad my birthday balloons came of use. What an awesome, awesome win. I don't think we'll be able to match that victory anytime soon. Go boys! :D

aequo animo (advocatus diaboli) said...

Cookies.., :( sad, none like that at my work place
But you must be back to spoof poetry now :D