A man of his words

Fans of Viv's unconventional pictionary skills will be pleased to know that he has been working on a new talent. I call it 'killing the lyrics'; he calls it art.

So he was ironing, when I heard him hum these words.

"Chhota sa mann hai...
Mann mein hiran hai."

"Oye! It's not hiran, it's sanam." I corrected him. I can't stand people singing wrong lyrics, especially of Hindi songs.

"No, this is different. This has its own meaning." He said seriously. "Do you know what it means?"

"No, Viv, I don't. What does it mean?" I asked innocently, suppressing my laughter. This was going to be fun.

"It means that all the thoughts in my mind are hopping about like a hiran (deer)."

"Err.. a deer doesn't exactly hop about. A rabbit does. You should then sing "Mann mein khargosh (rabbit) hai." I did the classic 'Viv-killjoy-thing'.

He gave me the classic 'Sayesha-dagger-look.'

"You won't understand. This is an art. Only someone like Javed Akhtar will know the deep meaning and deep pain in my lyrics."

"I don't know about deep meaning, but I'm surely experiencing deep pain right now." I said.

He ignored me.

A while later, I heard him sing again.

Humko sirf tumse pyaar hai...
Humko sirf tumse pyaar hai...
*long pause*

Humko sirf tumse pyaar hai...
Humko sirf tumse pyaar hai...
*long pause*

"Hahahahaha! Aage nahin aata?" I laughed.

He continued.

"Dhoondte rahein tumko raat bhar
Kho gayi thi meri zindagi se bekhabar
Soch raha tha pyaar hai magar
Mera pyaar tha tumpe be-asar."

"Dude!" I asked. "What the hell was that?? You just about changed the entire paragraph! Do you even know what the word 'bekhabar' means?"

"Yeah. It means "without khabar - without news". You see, she left him without any news."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. This is bascially the guy professing his love for someone who doesn't love him back, and left him without any news." He said with a serious face, while I clutched my tummy and laughed.

A little while later, it started again.

"Raat hamari toh...
*pause*
chand ke sahaare hai...
*pause*
andhera kyun hai aise..."
*pause*

"What's the last line?" he said. "Can you sing it for me?"

"Aayi woh akeli hai." I sang.

"Oh yeah." He said. A few seconds later, he sang, "Current toh gayeli hai".

"Erm?"

"This is about people protesting against the electricity board. That's why the raat is chand ke sahaare... no lights, you see." He explained.

"Ohhh, right." I said.

He continued to iron and sing away.

"Andheraaa... rootha hai... Sandesaaa... jhootha hai..."

"WHAT?!"

"Arre, the hidden meaning is that the fax machine stopped working half-way through. So the sandesa is not correct."

"Uh-huh."

He continued singing.

"Gumsum sa kone mein baitha hai..."

"And who's that?"

"The fax machine still. It is just sadly sitting there in the corner because there is no power."

"Masha allah! Go on." I encouraged.

"Kitne dinon ke baad aayegi paheli hai..." He rambled on.

"Dude! That doesn't even make sense." I said.

"That's because I haven't specified the punctuation."

"Oh right. The punctuation. Pray specify it."

"Kitne dinon ke baad aayegi dot-dot-dot paheli hai."

"Hainnn?"

"As in - no one knows when the power supply will be back. It's a riddle. Paheli." He grinned.