Sunday, April 29, 2007

The thunder thief

Not many people would have had the experience of pouring sambar into a katori under the watchful eyes of a Chinese lady who speaks fluent tamil, and who had also made the sambar, by the way.

So I've started volunteering in the kitchen of the restaurant owned by the Temple of Fine Arts. The restaurant is run by volunteers who do most of the chores like cooking and serving the food. I've always wanted to volunteer there (being a firm believer of the notion that cooking and serving food to others are amongst the noblest things one can do) but I firmed up the details only after Viv and I held a post-wedding party for our close friends at that restaurant. The organisers had done an amazing job with the decor at the party and even had the two customary chairs which are so mandatory at Indian wedding receptions. And not to mention my favourite flowers - pink gerberas!

At the party, we had done a slideshow for our guests, mainly to showcase what our 'south Indian-north Indian' mix wedding was like. After the party, we got several emails, including one from the event manager, telling us that they found the slideshow really funny. I still remember the slide that got the most laughs. Many relatives, upon finding out that I was marrying a south Indian had called to ask me what Viv looked like. To make things interesting, I'd told 'em gasping relatives that he looked like South Indian superstar Mammootty. No offence to Mammootty, but aforementioned relatives were very relieved when they finally saw Viv. I told this story at the party and even had a Mammootty vs. Viv comparison slide. I guess everyone at the restaurant remembered that because on the first day of my volunteering, I was introduced to each of the other volunteers as "the girl who had her wedding party and the funny slideshow here last month".

Anyway, today they needed help for a catering event for 500 people, and my mom-in-law and I pitched in. We had almost finished preparing 500 pieces of banana leaves, when the event manager came up to me, smiled and said, "Sayesha, there's a new volunteer and I want you to help him settle down." I turned around and the "new volunteer" turned out to be the man Viv himself! He had a meeting in the morning, but I'd asked him to join us if he finished early.

We were put in charge of preparing two trays of mithai. Both of us put some amazing teamwork and our geeky engineer-brains to work in order to calculate how we could best arrange the three different kinds of mithai into a pattern using two trays in a way that all of it was used up. We made a futile attempt to make the others understand our precise use of mathematics in the mithai arrangement, but they kinda just gave up and we were left to do our 'exciting calculations'.

After the mithai was done, the tamil-speaking Chinese sambar-lady put Viv in charge of making the coconut chutney. Under her watchful eye, of course. Viv made a ridiculous amount of chutney - the container itself was the kind from which buffaloes drink water! It was hilarious to see him make the chutney in the funny mixer that did not have a lid so he had to keep his hand on top, and every time he opened the mixer, bits of chutney went flying in all directions. I put on an apron for him, to protect him from the flying chutney. But he still managed to get drops of the pakora batter (pakora man was standing right behind Viv) neatly deposited in the form of yellow dots amidst the blue dots on his white shirt. After a while, sambar-lady left Viv to handle the chutney all by himself. Sheesh! This guy just walks in and wins everyone over! I suspected that she trusted his chutney-making skills more than she trusted my sambar-pouring skills! Hmmmph! Ok fine I admit it, I was beginning to get really jealous.

And then there was the guy who renamed me. One of the volunteers was this really young chap. He approached me hesitantly.

"Errr...." he said to me, and paused, as if trying to place where he knew me from.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Uhhh...."

I was getting a bit tired of smiling politely and waiting for his memory to revert to him, when he got it.

"Oh yeah! Now I remember! You're the south-meets-north slideshow girl!"

"Huh? I'm the what?"

"The south-meets-north slideshow girl... your husband is Viv, right?"

"Ohh... er, yeah, that would be me." I said out aloud.

But in my head, I was saying something else.

What the...?! "Viv" you know! But "Sayesha" you don't! He has a name, but I don't? He is Viv, and I'm just random south-meets-north slideshow girl??? :/

"Sheesh, Viv... you steal my thunder one more time and..." My thoughts were interrupted by another introduction session.

"This is Sayesha, she and her husband Viv had their wedding party here last month, remember?"


"Oh yeah, I think Viv sent us a very nice 'Thank you' email after the event." came the reply.

Dubbal sheesh!

It was me who had sent the very nice 'Thank you' email after the event. Me, not Viv. Just like most people, I like to get my fair credit where it's due. And I especially can't tolerate anyone stealing my thunder. Argh.

Ah well. Just one more balidaan by bhartiya naari for pati parmeshwar. I'm used to it now. Well, almost. A cousin speaks to him for the first time on the phone for like ten minutes and declares that he likes Viv more than he likes me. Gee thanks. Bro, you choose random stranger over 26 years of cousin-ship? My folks are so proud of him because he can speak my language but I'm still struggling with his! But Tamil is a terribly terribly difficult language, but no one gives me credit for that! Waaaaaaaaaa! :'(


And not just in the real world! 2 years at the bar. 488 posts. 16692 comments. And this guy just saunters along and becomes the laadla of every bewda/bewdi at the bar! People message me on gtalk, "So when is Viv playing pictionary again?"

Bhai does the hard work, guy gets the bouquets.


Sigh.

I guess it's true then.


Behind every successful man is a random south-meets-north slideshow girl. :/



42 comments:

Sakshi said...

So when is Viv coming here again?

Now if you let him go on and on and on about things.. may be we will get back to focusing on bhai :)
*ducks as bhai comes with the ladle still full of sambhar*

And btw- GOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!!

Sayesha said...

#Sakshi,
Arre why would I throw sambhar at you? Just because you like Viv more than you like me? Come on now, I'm not so immature!

*hurls buffalo-baalti full of coconut chutney at Sakshi*

Clueless said...

Aww. You're not just random girl who happens to be Viv's wife - you're my BBG (and I couldn't have asked for a better one!). If there's something I'm thankful to Viv for, it's for providing that connection. How else would I have gotten to know the awesome person you are, huh? :D

Neihal said...

ROTFL!!!

Yeah yeah behind every random successful man is a true Bhartiya Naari. :P

cool said...

ae bhai!
tension nahi lene kaa..
wo kya hai naa ki logon ka khopdi me chotta cheez asaani se fit ho jaata hai naa, lekin bada bada cheez seekhne me unko time lagta hai.

bole to viv kitna chota naam hai..
asaani se atak jaata hai.. :)
ab sayesha bolega to thoda time to lagega naa.... samajhne me ...

ekdum tension nahi lene kaa.

Bivas said...

Sheesh, Viv... you steal my thunder one more time
That is so Monica!!! :P

And in other news...Aussies making kachummar of the Sri Lankan bowling attack...dat is so not done :-(

raven said...

getting bored of seeing the aussies make nariyal chutney outta all teams... and the final seems to be no different frm any other aussie featuring match in this world cup :(

even sayesha's writing's more interesting than this final now!

p.s.: hi viv! keep up the good work.

Koi Pahailee said...

Hey Viv ..oops sorry..hey, the girl who threw a party here last month:)

I bet u must have taken pics of taht mithai...
put it up:)

Thisisme said...

hahahaha...sahi hai bhai..bhartiya naari bechari :D

Psst: i got those gloves ..damn gud :D:D

Shekhar said...

~Laughs~ Sayesha ji, chill maar yaar. Tussi great ho...koi kya aapka thunder steal karega.

But "balidaan by bhartiya naari" ?????? :O

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

viv is going to post? when??? when??

Sandew said...

=))
you as an entity no longer exists. You has become them now

satish said...

bhai, mere liye toh app hee asli hero ho.

srsly, wen is viv posting again? why wont you let him have his own blog??

Sayesha said...

#Clueless,
Hehehe... you're too kind, my dear :)

#Neihal,
Uffff another abla naari speaketh! :D

#Cool,
Hmmm... naam tak theek hai, lekin woh toh apun ke kaam ka bhi credit maar leta hai! :/

#Bivas,
Hahahaha! Yeah, I'm mostly Phoebe, but sometimes I can be verrry Monica! :P
ps: I watched the match until it hadn't started! :P Too heart-breaking for me to watch it, so watched until the rain stopped! :D

#Raven,
Yeah man... might as well just hand them the Cup the next time! :(

//even sayesha's writing's more interesting than this final now!

Even Sayesha's writing? Hmmmph! :/

#Koi Pahailee,
Ya allah! You too?! You used to always be on my side! :/
ps: Nope, no pictures of mithai :)

#Thisisme,
You got the gloves? Awesome! Where did you get them??

#Shekhar,
Apun chill hi maar raha tha, ab toh naariyal maarega apun! :/

#Ipanema Girl,
Uffffff! Daaktarni sahiba, you toh shut up, warna I'll stop my gundagardi and then you won't get any patients with broken bones! Apun tera dhandha band karwa sakta hai samjhi? Hmmmph!

#Sandew,
Naan sense.

#Satish,
Hahahaha! Dil se bol raha hai ki darr se? ;)

//why wont you let him have his own blog??

Let him? Why won't I LET HIM??? I've been after him to get his own blog for ages now! Err... mainly so he stops hogging the limelight on mine :P

Dreamcatcher said...

Awww. The pictionary post is waay cute. Which is not to say you're cute. Maybe you should have a blog :)

Iday said...

Arre bhai - dont feel bad! Agar yeh bharatiya nari log balidaan nahin kare to pati parmeshwar succesful kaise hoga?

apun toh sirf shaz jaante hai :)

btw - woh south-meets-north mammooty wale guy koh hi bol dena :)

crazy said...

Awwwwww.... Besides all your 'jealousy", tumhare pati-parmeshwar ke liye tumhari 'admiration' aur tumhara pyaar chalak raha hai ... hehe ;)

Rebellion said...

ROFLLLLLL bhai! This was awesome!! hehehe. I still remember Viv's guest post and how all the bewdas/bewdis fell in for it (& him too ;):P)

Koi gal nahi bhai, I understand your plight completely. Bhaartiya naari na, hamare saath hamesha aisa-ich hota hai! Even I keep telling always "Meri toh koi kadar hi nahi hai" :| :P

PS: I think it was really really cute of Viv to join in the volunteering :) And not to forget, he joined coz of you, so due credit goes to you too :D

Raam Pyari said...

*runs round and round the room chanting 'Viv is my ladla too!!'*

yeaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

*maxxx maxxx fond type luk for viv*

sandya said...

abbe oi, bhartiya nari ki bachchi, this naari still knows who teh 'real'creative head of this south-meets-north reunion is. As for viv, it sis a fact babes, you cant but like him. I guess that why you talleed for him nai ;)

sandya said...

And kudos to you for volunteering at that wonderful place. I completely agree - khaana banaake auron ko kihilaane se jyaada achche bade kam punya hote hain "

Sush said...

haha.. bhai khud hi thunder hai... abhi bichara usey kya steal karega, he already has you :).. nice narration and nice of you to take time for such noble things.

Thisisme said...

never noticed it before..but its avlbl here in cosmetic stores ..called exfoliating gloves :P saw them..remembered ur post :D:D enthu aaya..le daala :)) tried them too..they r great!!

Garam Bheja Fry said...

Viv bhott limelight loot rela hai!! cousin's bhi talli ho gayee uspe..Bar ke customer to pehle hi maala japing uski.. tu successful man ke behind me powerpoint se khelti reh geli re.. ab tu MS-word use karke sabko bata de..kon kitte paani(daaru) me hai..

sayesha fight maarne ka!! :D

Tejal said...

hey dat was so cool of u to volunteer!
ok now bout viv- *flutters eyelashes* sooooo cuteeee... he joined u?? awww..totally adorable.. yea..wen wil he post next? wen wen wen?!! yea..one bouquet for him from me tooo!!! *violent flutterin of eyelashes continues*
n wat? y u jealous??!! kaun si BIIJLI churai Viv ne huh? u're gettin all indirect credit :P
btw..v r all in for da slide show tooo u kno! :P :P :P

Macho Girl said...

Tamil is definitely one of the most difficult languages to learn!!! I really dont know how you are doing it! I lived in Tamil Nadu all my life and my spoken tamil is just ok and the writing and reading part.... erm... lets not get there :P

And yeah! I would have never watched Sex and the City if you hadn't introduced it to me! thats a new addition to my list of favourite shows. U may have the full credit for that! :);)

Harsha said...

You have an identity crisis!!! ;)

If only Viv would blog more often perhaps we'd get his side of story :)

You are getting solid mileage here because of Viv... so many wonderful posts coz of him... Just check the no. of posts that say Viv-acious.....i'd say he's your inspiration... you've gotten funnier and better... for once, there is a successful man behind a successful woman :)

Mrs Viv... heh heh heh

Sayesha said...

#Dreamcatcher,
I assume you're talking to him? So I won't reply :)

#Iday,
Hahahaha! Okie will do. Waise woh khud hi padhkar grin kar raha hoga! :/

#Crazy,
Haan woh toh hai *blush* :)

#Rebellion,
Hahaha! Tu hi meri dukhiyari daastaan samajhti hai! :P

#Raam Pyari,
Yeh lo! Aur ek Viv-deewani! :)

#Sandya,
Haha! Shukar hai some people know the real story :)

//As for viv, it sis a fact babes, you cant but like him. I guess that why you talleed for him nai ;)

Hehehe... shat-pratishat sahi! :)

#Sush,
//bhai khud hi thunder hai... abhi bichara usey kya steal karega, he already has you :)

Wah Sush wah! Kya statement mara! Maza aa gaya! :D

#Thisisme,
Awesome! Unko bolna meri commission bhijwa dein! ;)

#Garam Bheja Fry,
//tu successful man ke behind me powerpoint se khelti reh geli re.. ab tu MS-word use karke sabko bata de..kon kitte paani(daaru) me hai..

Mind-blowing! Kya inspiring words hai! Wah! Sahi bola re, time aa gela hai apun sabko dikha de kiske daaru ka level high hai! :D

#Tejal,
Uffff! Eyelashes flutter flutter kar gir jayenge, thoda break de! :P

#Macho Girl,
I know man... am still struggling! But I know the interesting words to say to him, e.g. "Koranga madiri!" Muahahaha! :D

//And yeah! I would have never watched Sex and the City if you hadn't introduced it to me!

Eeesh! Meri repuation ka kabada ho gaya! Introducing such shows to you leetal girls! :O

ps: Come over in the holidays, we're having a SATC DVD marathon! :D

#Harsha,
//So many wonderful posts coz of him

WHAT? Oye! Posts likha kisne? Huh huh huh? Sheesh! :/

Iday said...

//I know man... am still struggling! But I know the interesting words to say to him, e.g. "Koranga madiri!" Muahahaha! :D

OMG :O :O :O

Sayesha said...

#Iday,
Hahahahaha! You should have seen his face when I said to him totally out of the blue "Ni koranga madiri shirikire"! Ahahahaha! :D

Iday said...

Oh my freaking god :O
I just cant stop laughing!!!

Sorry viv. I just cant help it :)

Tejal said...

er.. khud hi has rahe hain??
thoda explain bhi karo na! y u talkin in alien lingo :(
wat is koranga madiri?

The Visitor said...

I'm just random south-meets-north slideshow girl???
That's a singular distinction, Sayesha. How many other south-meets-north slideshow girl do you know of? I know none. :)

qsg said...

This writer of this post seems to be an extremely doting wife who is totally in love with this guy who we have come to know and like - only because of the picture she paints of him! :)

Sayesha said...

#Iday,
Hehehe... abhi toh shuruaat hai, aage aage dekhiye hota hai kya! :P

#Tejal,
Hehehehe... I'm learning tamil re... this sentence just means "You laugh like a monkey." Not so faaanny when said in English, but in tamil it's hilarious! :D

#The Visitor,
Hmmm good point. Let me use this name when I apply for a job or a visa. We'll see then. :D

#QSG,
Heheheh... hope we get to meet you some day! :)

Anoop Sundaram said...

:D reminds me of one tamil movie "Mounaragam" where Revathy teaches tamil to a hindi guy... ask Viv to show you that movie :p i think this link has that .. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJubnoABHPw

Sayesha said...

#Anoop,
No subtitles! Waaaaa! :'(

Sayesha said...

#Anoop,
And I think I have seen Mounaragam. I think it was remade in hindi too?

Tejal said...

heheh..its Fannnnnyyy in eng too ;)

Anoop Sundaram said...

you dont need english subtitles for that :D those scenes are in hindi and english anyways!!

oh i didnt know that.. jus now read that it was remade as Kasak in hindi in '92...

Sayesha said...

#Tejal,
:D

#Anoop,
Oh okay! Didn't watch the full thing - gave up when I realised there are no subtitles! :P

Anonymous said...

It is remarkable, very valuable message