Thursday, March 21, 2013

Catch-up #4

So I'm looking at the date of my last post and in the words of a teenager, I'm going "ZOMG!!!!"

(Ok fine, not just in the words of a teenager. In my words too. Yes, I admit it. I use ZOMG. Well, sometimes OMG just doesn't do it.)

I have neglected the bar a lot in the last 2-3 years. And every time I do it, I find no other way to spring back than to write a catch-up post like this. Composed of all things random and then some more randomness.

This time, it's been too long. A month almost. All my bewdas have probably wandered away, but for some strange reason, I have started getting emails from companies who pretend to have read my blog. They send me 'proposals' such as 'invites for you to write about us', feature me on this 'new social network that helps Indian consumers discover new stuff', getting some 'bucks for your traffic and driving up ranking' or make me 'write something relevant to your blog but relate it to our product'. I ignore all such emails the way one ignores random fraaaandship requests on FB, and most of the time that's that. If their email is a little personalised, I might just drop a reply to say that the bar doesn't feature ads. But sometimes they send a follow-up email which makes me laugh. Especially when they say something like "If at anytime, you are thinking that we are ruining your site revenue strategy, then I will persuade you to believe otherwise." (True story, that.) My "site revenue strategy"?? Hahahahahahahaha.

Honestly, I don't think the bar is what it used to be in terms of traffic, and I am ok with it. I have not been as regular or interesting as I was a few years ago when I was young and foolish. Now I'm just old(er) and foolish. So... here's a message to all these companies -- trust me, you will not make any money advertising here. Even if you are okay with earning 3 cents a year off my blog, I don't want to feature any ads. The bar was and always will be my random hang-out place, it will never be a business. If I didn't make it a business when I had a crazyass number of hits a day, why would I do it now when there are ummm... five people who read it? (Hmm... I should totally write a book called 'The five people who read my blog'. I bet it will make more money than Mitch Albom's book.) I think even Viv doesn't follow the bar anymore. Let's see how long it takes him to express his indignation at the previous statement. *evil grin*

A lot has happened in the last few weeks and I don't know where to start my catch-up post. But I do know that I will refrain from any Xena-related stuff on this post, because it's only once in a blue moon that I don't write about her.

So I will start with the next most important topic to me - Bollywood. I watched 'Special 26' and was not too impressed. I think the standards set by 'A Wednesday' are too high. Plus, after watching him in 'A Wednesday', no self-respecting Jimmy Shergill fan will support a movie that has him playing a pansy.

Speaking of things that disappointed me, I also caught Priyanka Chopra's album 'In my city'. I thunked my head on the wall. I can't believe a former Miss World and a Bollywood A-lister couldn't find someone to at least make the video a little classy.

Speaking of thunking my head on the wall, I read an old issue of Filmfare and you know that section they have been running for 8354876875486 years, where Shatrughan Sinha answers inane questions such as 'What do women want?', sneaking in a 'Salman is God' whenever he can? Yeah, so some girl had asked 'How should one ask the boss for an increase in salary?' And his prize-winning answer (I kid you not) was 'How can you, an intelligent woman, ask me such a question? You have the most important weapons, a smile or tears. But if they fail to shake the boss for a raise then the only potent option one could suggest would be just to sleep over the matter.' Honestly, I fell off my chair when I read that. I cannot even begin to list the number of ways in which his reply is sexist. And this was a prize-winning Q&A. Tsk tsk.

We also recently watched English Vinglish. I had watched it in the theatre but Viv had not because he was watching Xena. But it's such a lovely movie, I totally didn't mind watching it again. Especially when it was in the company of friends. We are trying to see if we can all catch up at least once or twice a month, even if it's just getting together at someone's place to watch a movie. We actually had a Govinda-themed party some time ago, would you believe it? Pizzadude won it hands-down, but I think I was a close second with my light blue capris, a fluorescent green spagetti strap top and a checked shirt containing the colours red, blue, green and black. And oh, bright pink slippers to complete the look. If visions of that are blinding you, try and imagine Pizzadude's attitre. The theme for our next party is 'Wear something that has been lying in your wardrobe forever, but you have never worn it'. That should be interesting.

Speaking of friends, our bestest friends from Dubai came-a-visiting and it was awesome! Guys, if you're reading this (you should be; you're two of the five people!), I miss you! Come back! Soon!

Recently, I had a chance to read Ashwin Sanghi's 'Krishna Key'. I had missed his 'Chanakya's Chant' which I'm told is very good, so I thought I'd try this as I'm very into Indian mythology. And then I read it. No, I made time to read it. And then I finished it. OMG. No, ZOMG. Honestly, I have never read a book worse than this one. Seriously. When I read the end, I did not know what to do and how to get all my precious hours back. A reviewer once said about a book, "You simply can't put this book down. You absolutely need to toss it out of the window." That is exactly how I felt after reading this book.

Viv and I bought Shaun T's Insanity workout program, and goodness, the name speaks for itself. It's just an hour each day, but the workout really lives up to its name. However, you will really feel your fitness level rise. I must warn you though, it is NOT easy. I am still doing the month 1 workouts and will probably never be able to proceed to the month 2 stuff (yes, it is THAT insane), so I keep repeating the month 1 routine. And it kills me. Every time. It's not for nothing that the Insanity people say 'My warm-up > Your workout'. (Disclaimer: I have not received any money from the fit folks at Insanity for the above paragraph. I would be really stupid to sneak in an ad in the very post where I am bashing blog ads.)

Speaking of stuff one can do at home, I actually attempted my first haircut by myself. I frankly can't afford the time to find a babysitter for Xena, and go to a salon for a haircut, especially if I'm going to come back looking like a scarecrow because the stylist can't cut Indian hair. Ok fine, junglee Indian hair. I figured I can't cut it worse than them so why not? It lasted 5 days. The hair-cutting process, not the hair. I actually started cutting bits and pieces whenever Xena was sleeping. On day 3, Viv looked at me funny and I had to explain to him that I was in the middle of a haircut. Thankfully, on day 5, I was happy with the results. So yes, it's possible.

All right, that's it for now. What have you guys been up to? :)


Nidhi said...

This proves that I keep coming back to your the hope of finding a new post. :)

Bubblegum.... said...


It was an awesomely long post and totally loved it.

Dil se said...

Ok, I am also among the 5 who read your blog and loved this update. Am so jealous, to be frank, of the friend circle you have(Just because I don't have any here)
And I loved your idea for hair cut. Gosh, you are daring :-)

Kanan said...

Here's your reader #4. ;) Nice to see a new post with updates. I'm waiting for a good desi movie to come out. Loved English Vinglish too. Other than that, I've been up to a lot.. may be about time I wrote a post about it to salvage the ignored blog.

I claim the remaining bronze ;)

Ratzzz said...



Tsk Tsk Tsk!! regular at the bar. though low of our loyalty eh? said...

Sorry to disappoint you ... Reader No. 6 !! :P

Disha said...

Haha..And here is reader#7.

anjali said...

and 8. faithfully check every day. atleast once. yeah, there are days when i check more than once :-)

Shraddha said...

And here's reader #9 :)

Glad to see a new post... have been looking for one since the moment I read the previous post...

V said...

well, well , well. You forgot V.

Sowmya said...

I faithfully check ur blog every weekday or whenever I'm low and need to perk up, I read you archived blogs :)

Anonymous said...

There are way more than five people visiting here!
I check the blog almost everyday to see if there's a new post. Hum toh yahan ke purane bewde hain, bas naam badal gaya hai! :)
Loved the long post. :) What a feat that haircut was! But it would be fun if we could see pics of Xena on days 1,2,3,4 and 5 :D

Unknown said...

Another faithful reader here...Keep the posts comming please

Divya said...

i see that we have lost count :) btw happy birthday to Xena!! waiting for a birthday post now.

Shekhar said...

Reader no. 15 reporting!! :)

Really glad to read your post.

I was nodding vigorously where you wrote about Ashwin Sanghvi. I too had heard great reviews about Chanakya Chant. But when I read a couple of pages, I disliked the writing style so much that I just could not go on. Hence, I have also decided to not to have anything to do with Krishna Key.

Soumya said...

Reader num hmm 50? I am a regular here too. I am sure there are way more than 5, albeit silent :)
Loved English Vinglish, simple, realistic and sweet!

Ijji said...

a long time lurker on your blog de-lurking today, for a quick hello :) ..keep the bar alive , there are wayyyyy more than 5 bewdas who will always keep coming back for more!!

and even on days you don't post most of these bewdas dig the archives...and your posts provide it all...daily dose of humour..motivation on a not so sunny day.and not to mention the adorable Xena and Viv :)

Technofun said...

Nice post... Do try to send updates even if short post... Special 26 was okish.... Kai po che is also good one if you are want to watch some serious movie...

Arun said...

How can we keep away from one of the happiest places on the web?

Beena Venugopal said...

Hey Sayesha,

Been a regular at your bar for quite some time :) Love your sprightly posts - especially those about Xena !

I agree that there are more than 5 bewda/di s out there looking out for you !!

Thank you for keeping it alive and bringing a smile on my face, whenever you do surface :)

Take care !
Beena (Mumbai)

Sayesha said...

Thanks for the faith. :)

Thanks. :)

Dil se,
Would you believe that I met the whole gang through my blog?? :D

Yes, please start blogging again. I liked your review of English Vinglish, please review more movies! :)

Thank you. :)
PS: My dad often mentions your blog. He calls you "Orchestra". :)

Thanks! :)

Wow, thanks for the faith and support! :)

Thank you! :)

You still lurk here?? :)

Thank you! :)

Thanks! :)

I will try my best! :)

Thanks for remembering! :)

Yeah I think I can't read anything by him anymore. That's how bad Krishna Key was!

Thank you. :)

Thank you so much! :)

I will try my best! :) I might try and catch Kai Po Che. :)

:D :D :D

Thank you so much! :) said...

He is one of the 2-3 people who visit my blog ... so thanks to him :)

Urv said...

Mail pictures of Pizzadude. Pls pls pls. And well, since we are on the topic, you can mail you rangeela ones too :P

Geomon said...

:) :_)
always good to catch up. was feeling rusty and old. this post seems to have taken away my post-monday blues. :P

i think i must thank the person who gave me ur blog link. if it were not for that, i wud have missed out on such a good thing as the bar.

even though you have so much on ur plate: bringing up Xena, dealing with her medications and hospital visits and given how physically and emotionally draining parenting is and especially with what u have been thru in the past 2 years, i must say u r no less of a warrior queen. kudos to both Viv n u for doing such a gr8 job.

PS: once a bewda, always a bewda. cheers n prost!

--Sunrise-- said...

Lady, you are ALWAYS going to be followed by me. Hell, I get attached to freaking *TV* characters (no matter how much of a downturn a show takes, I will still follow it loyally because uhm... the characters are now my friend? I have a life! Promise! :P)... how can I *not* get attached to a) a wonderful writer b) a fellow Bollyholic c) a beautiful mother d) Xena's goshdarnfreakinCUTEST antics??

One day, as I know you mentioned, you will look back on all these posts and realise that there were some people who *care*, damnit and who were true witnesses to your life. And touchwood one day, Xena will join the list of admirers and witnesses. Don't stop blogging, this stranger cares about your life and wishes you nothing but happiness and wants to share in all the life lessons you are learning. :) Blogger hit counts do not matter (heavens knows I have like, three readers!!), it's the passion with which you blog and the ever-burning flame of hope that someone, somewhere will feel connected to your words. Maybe connected enough to leave a comment, maybe not. But connected enough to *read* and connected enough to care about you and ponder your thoughts for the day to come. And you always do that to me with your blog. :) :) :)

Hema said...

Hey Sayesha! I'm a little late but count me in among the regular followers of your blog :)

Your bar is a lovely place to hang out and enjoy :) I absolutely love your posts and look forward for them especially the ones about princess Xena. Keep them coming...

Hema said...

Hey Sayesha! I'm a little late but count me in among the regular followers of your blog :)

Your bar is a lovely place to hang out and enjoy :) I absolutely love your posts and look forward for them especially the ones about princess Xena. Keep them coming...

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