Tiny Tapori turns two

It’s Baby Aish’s second birthday party. Her Mausi takes up a guitar a la Phoebe and starts some long-distance rapping.

Now listen up, young lady, I'm talkin' to you
You've reached the age that they call 'Terrible Two'.
An age that drives many a young mom mad
While helplessly looks on, the err... helpless Dad.

I see you've started on the path
of terrorising your parents already
There's a naughty twinkle in your eye
Your gait's no longer unsteady

Gone are the days when you only knew
how to pee, poo, eat, gurgle and crawl
Now you've discovered the power
Of the prolonged high-pitched bawl

You make so much noise, you drive ‘em neighbours insane
Every now and then they come-a-knocking to complain
But when I plead over the phone, "Sing for me, put on a show?"
You toss your tiny little head and say a flat "No".

You’ve learnt how to dial 911 and call the cops
You’ve already broken the keys of two laptops!
There’s a bunch of rented DVDs inside the DVD player
You’ve stuffed them in real nice, haven’t you - layer after layer!

You’ve spilled, broken, shrieked, and still refused to eat
You have thrown things out the window on to the street!
You’ve taken red crayons and scribbled on the white wall
When you grow up, here are some things for you to recall

Some day when you’re all grown up
And feel that your parents are driving you mad
"Mom doesn’t get me at all!” You'll rant.
“And don't even get me started on Dad!"

I'd like you to come back here
And read all the things you did
At Terrible Two, you drove ‘em mad too
But they still loved you, you naughty li’l kid.

Happy birthday, baby! >:D<