Monday, August 18, 2014

A smart cookie

A few months ago, I had blogged about smartphones and why I was so wary about getting one. I was happy with my Nokia whatever-model-it-was. Until one day it stopped working. Like many mothers, I would also like to blame the toddler for the breakdown of any appliance. It was HER water bottle that leaked in my bag and ruined my phone. (It's a totally different matter that it was ME who put her water bottle and my phone together in the same compartment of the bag.)

I still have to give it to the phone though. It coughed and spluttered and revived itself, and chugged along for another four months. And then SOMEBODY dropped it. I won't say who that SOMEBODY was, but I can tell you it was the same person who was silly enough to put a water bottle and a phone in the same compartment of the bag. And from there, it went downhill. Like a cat, it died and resurrected itself some nine times. The most effective strategy I used to revive it whenever it died involved a lot of thought and precision -- I had to determine the exact height from which to release it so that it neatly divided itself into four components, which then had to be immediately put together and the phone would become fully functional. For another three and a half hours.

It was in the middle of this that I wondered if it was time to recontract with my service provider, who would then put me out of my misery by giving me a new phone with my new contract. I figured it was best to get a smartphone, but without any smart features that would distract me and/or Xena and turn me into a smartphone-wielding zombie. At the same time, I could take good pictures and perhaps use WhatsApp only on WiFi for all the events I organise with others who only use WhatsApp. It would surely avoid stuff like the Easter party fiasco. And guess what? It was indeed time to recontract. So we went to the shop and had a look at all the phones. There were a few free phones they were offering with a new contract and Viv, after using his HTC to read reviews and comparisons, remarked how good some of them were. "The smartphone industry is getting really competitive," he remarked. I nodded smartly.

Anyway, they offered me a $50 voucher for the new contract and told me I could use it to offset against the value of my new phone. We picked the Asus Zenfone, which they were offering for $48.  The first thing that struck me about the phone was how big it was. Wait a minute, weren't phones getting smaller and smaller at some point? Weren't the smallest phones the coolest phones? When did they start getting bigger again, and most importantly, where was I? Anyway, with a beating heart, I held my new phone and observed it as it did cool and scary things that I was not familiar with.

"So now I need a screen protector." I said, brimming with the confidence that only people who have never had smartphones exude.

"Oh no, don't." said Viv. "It will interfere with the resolution." I nodded smartly again as if I really understood how it would impact my life.

Viv doesn't like any phone accessories. I have to admit though -- his phone actually looks sleek. Kinda naked, but sleek. So I knew where the conversation was headed.

"Ok, but I surely need a cover for the phone." I declared.

"No, bad idea." He said.

What was with all this negativity, dude? I decided to fight it out.

"I need a cover."

"You don't really need a cover. It makes the phone look ugly."

"I need a cover. What if it falls and breaks? WHAT IF I DROP MY BRAND NEW PHONE AND IT BREAKS?" I tried to make a strong point by speaking in all caps.

And then he provided me with the solution. A solution so simple and elegant and amazing that it reminded me all over again why I married this brilliant Homo sapien. A solution, which I think should be immediately shared with the entire humanity so that billions of deprived smartphone owners all over the world can partake of its amazingness.

"Don't drop it." He said, shrugging his shoulders.


CookieCrumbsInc. said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :D Simple solution, indeed :)

How do you like the smartness of the phone?

G2 said...

Gold!!!... And have to give it to Viv..he is really a genius! :D

Arun said...


Does Xena get it when you speak in all caps? Or do you have to have an all caps look on your face as well? :)

V said...

I was considering the zenfone 5 for my technologically challenged sister. How is it?

TMaYaD said...

Ha, bhai converted. Free round of drinks for everyone.
An interesting fact: your phone is a faster computer than the 100kg desktop used by an awesome *cough cough* developer to learn computers less than a decade ago.

Sayesha said...

I'm not using any smart features except WhatsApp, but only on WiFi so when I'm out, I'm not forever on my phone. I like it so far because it's user-friendly and I'm quite happy without any data plan. :)


LOL. I'm usually very animated when talking so people can tell which case I'm talking in without me having to yell. :P And yes, I have a very special all caps look for Xena.

On behalf of your sister and myself, I have only thing to say to you - HMMMPH! :/ Technologically challenged it seems. :/
PS: It's a very good phone. But I don't know if someone who wants to use all the smartphone features will like it. :)

Subhash Chandra,
LOL! I know the feeling. I did programming in BASIC when I was in India and I got my first email address (HOTMAIL OMG) at the ripe old age of 18. :D

Arun said...

Hmm, Sayesha, is the way to get you to respond in the comments to ask you a question? :)

Sayesha said...

You're right, good sir.
PS: Lol! I know I'm very random with responding to comments! :P

Arun said...

It works, it works! (saw older threads as well :)) said...

I still miss my Nokia 6100. Given a chance I will get back to it but the pressure from family, friends and wifey is too much :|

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