Saturday, June 26, 2010

Window of opportunity

Before I even get started on the plot of this post, I find myself compelled to explain why (oh why) I even bought the Julie DVD. No no, this is not the classic Julie from 1975 with the totally awesome songs. This was Julie from 2004, and the very fact that the movie stole the name from an older, nicer movie should have sufficed to stop me in my tracks before I proceeded to the payment counter.

But I was blinded. Blinded by the presence of Priyanshu Chatterjee in the movie. Now those who have seen 'Tum Bin' and loved it the way I loved it, would know why Priyanshu is such a big deal. The moment he uttered the words, "Main sahara nahin, saath dene aaya hoon." ("I'm here to give you company, not support.") to the defiant Pia, women all over swooned, and men all over went, "Ughhh... not another SNAG we have to match up to!"

Anyway, so while I queued up with all these women waiting for his next movie, he was busy signing really bad ones.

And then I heard about Julie. And true to the spirit of humanity, someone had passionately recommended it to me as a must-watch, so we could be united in our lamentation later. Such a burning desire to see fellow humans suffer just like you did is becoming more and more common. Recently, I saw someone's Facebook status: "Raavan is a must-see! I want you to waste your time and money like I did."

So the fact that I was naive enough to believe that Julie was a good movie, and the fact that it had Priyanshu in it, made me buy the DVD.

And then I watched it.

*deep breath*

Neha Dhupia is a terrible terrible actress. The movie had a terrible terrible story. Sanjay Kapoor was simply terrible. And Priyanshu... how thee let thy fans down... sigh.

And so I was stuck with this DVD. The other DVDs in my DVD rack had started to inch away from this one, pinching their noses and giving me dirty looks as they did so. Each movie in my collection had earned its place. And this DVD was bringing the sanctity of that space down. I could see the other movies were not happy and were this --> <-- close to a mutiny. So I decided to throw it. Evil though I am, I could not bring myself to give it to a fellow human being with feelings and all. And that's when I remembered a tip Shub had given me on how to keep birds from offering their... err... "offerings" on your window sill. She'd told me that if you keep a CD at the window sill, the glare keeps the birds away. And the window near our drying yard does have the bird problem. So now I have the Julie DVD, which, once upon a time had scarred me, successfully scarring scaring birds away. Though I must say I don't know if it's the glare that's keeping them away.

I personally think they're all looking at the DVD and going, "That's enough crap for one window sill, c'mon let's find another place."



25 comments:

Porkodi (பொற்கொடி) said...

GOLD!!! :D

Porkodi (பொற்கொடி) said...

again, silver!!

Porkodi (பொற்கொடி) said...

and bronze! :P to stupidosaur, pizzadude and all kinda dudes and dudettes.. ;)

Porkodi (பொற்கொடி) said...

hahaha!!! this is so baaaaad! you give that poor guy a throne even when he didnt ask for it and then throw him out? :D

for me, woodpeckers "drill" into my brand new home to show off their "skills" for mating and I dont know how to put a CD swinging from the 40 ft high roof. hmmmph!

Kavity said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kavity said...

Hilarious :)
Makes my day, every time I read your post first thing in the morning :)

Buls said...

I can't believe you actually bought the CD for this one. It is crap... my friends in college watched when it released... super duper crap.

Arun said...

All I can say women swoon over the silliest things :) Now, men are very sensible in that regard. They don't swoon :)

And while in your kindness to humanity you are second only to Mother Theresa (and she's ahead only by a width of an optical disk) you might get into trouble with the SPCA for cruelty to birds via this (near)defenestration of a DVD :) At least you could have used some old Big B movie to keep the birds from your window sill.

mythalez said...

how .. how could you think of buying the CD of this movie ... no newspaper sprang over to give a whack on the head to put some sense in it? :P

lol @ title as usual :)

Menagerie said...

Love Tum Bin, watched it over 20 times kinda love. And Priyanshu. Yes Julie was disappointing, but I blame the story, the director, the co actor, everyone but him :)

Do check out 'Aapko Pehle bhi kabhi dekha hai' if you haven't already. Not a great movie, but enjoyable, and of course Priyanshu is adorable in that. ( Yes yes, I am swooning!! )

How do we know said...

he eh ehe.... u actually BOUGHT Julie? he eh ehe...

soumya said...

Can't believe you actually paid for that DVD.. LOL :D

Endless Road.. said...

Hilarious!!! It's amazing the things that you come up with...quite a talent I must say...I'm forever faced with the writer's block!

sagar said...

Well, u search for wrong things in wrong places bhai. Julie was never made for some good acting. You shud know why it was made else why wud one cast neha dhupia :P (although all actresses in bollywood r equally terrible)

Geomon said...

ugggh!seriously,i hated the movie for that guy.even though a lot of my male friends too 'love' it. he was like a male ba-hoo from sans-bahu sagas.
Museum main rehne wali is upto her bad ways again(gold,silver,bronze sab claim maara). bhai control karo.

李哲維 said...

河水永遠是相同的,可是每一剎那又都是新的。......................................................................

Sudeep said...

You bought Julie? Bought? Julie? ha ha ha ha.. now let me read the remaining post

Sudeep said...

he he.. good option.
Arre yeh Julie toh alag movie nikli.. Neha Dhupia ki double role wali kaunsi movie thi.. errmm Chetana or something like that. You should buy that one. Sachhi!

Ok fine how about 'Mr. Khujli'? Yeah it is a movie name.

rt said...

bought a DVD :)
and yes thats one of the dialogues i cud swoon over always :)

Sanchit said...

isliye kehte hai download karo aur dekho.. achchi lage to dvd kharido

t said...

lol you bought the DVD?!

Btw, you really have a knack for coming up with clever titles for your posts!

яノςんム said...

I never had the guts to watch this Movie Julie even though I am known for watching most pathetic of the movies and tagging em aesthetic :D

and its such a nostalgia reading about Priyanshu chatterjea and Tum Bin plus that dialogue.. 'main jaanta hoon aapko sahara nahi chahiye, main saath dene aya hoon' :)

He has always been underrated actor. anyways :D good to know someone else does watch such movies :D

~anu~ said...

hehehe.. yeah i watched that movie with the same hope! was in love with priyanshu back then, and felt let down too. :( he was so perfect in tum bin!

ClaUsTrophObiC said...

hahah...thanks for solving my pigeon problem as well...now I can make use of all the DVDs that i have and hate!

Neha said...

The very thought of having Neha in the lead role id so disturbing...she is still tolerable in those movies where you have 6-7 stories intertwined...she is so gigantic! And when i saw the cover, I quickly moved to another site...thought Sayesha ne kuch galat picture ka poster laga diya hai :D and my colleagues were all drooling...asking me what i was checking out in office!