Bytes from Kites

Finally, after reading the scary reviews and undergoing the 'To see or not to see' drama, I did it. I watched Kites. And here are my random thoughts after watching it (caution: spoilers present):

• First things first. I liked the movie. But it seems the reviewers don't like it and the junta doesn't like it (I read that people in India were walking out midway!) and sadly, it's a flop. I had called the theatre at 6.30 pm with my usual, "Aur sunao, dhandha kaisa chal raha hai?" query, aka "Are the tickets for the 7.45 show selling very fast?" and the woman who answered the phone laughed and said all the seats were available. Sheesh.
  
  
• Barbara Mori is a very good actress, and not AT ALL Megan Fox-esque like I'd expected her to be. I think it is very tough to impress people with your acting when you are this good-looking, and she managed it. In fact, I thought she acted better than Hrithik. There was a certain earnestness and sincerity about her that surpassed even Hrithik's.
  
  
• Hrithik and Barbara make an extremely good-looking couple. I didn't find her as hot as it was rumoured, but I did find her very beautiful. Hell, she looked good even with her messy hair and minimal to no make-up!
  
  
• Frankly, I don't think Barbara can make a home in Bollywood, but it would have been nice to have a good actress added to our very limited pool of the barely watchable and almost intolerable ones. And they had to show Raavan's trailer during the intermission to prove my point. Aishwarya, kuchh seekho!!
  
  
• Speaking of bad actresses, how terrible was Kangana in the scene where she breaks into Hrithik's house? I have NEVER heard a worse American accent than the one she tried to put on. Even though the director tried to salvage the scene by putting a baatli in her hands, it didn't help. Kangana should be barred from speaking in English at all times, just like how Deepika Padukone should be barred from speaking in Hindi at all times.
  
  
• It was nice though to see Kangana NOT play a drunk, drugged, psychotic suicidal character.
  
  
• Hrithik, please act in more movies so your strike rate is higher. You tried the Raj-Rahul thingie a la SRK. You tried the body banao thingie a la Sallu. Now you've tried the one-movie-a-year thingie like Aamir. Aise toh tera kuchh nahin hoga, beta.
  
  
• Hrithik sure sounded good in the title song.
  
  
• Kabir Bedi! What the...?! Tumhaare yeh din aa gaye hain??
  
  
• The actor who played Tony is called Nick Brown??? Huh??? Or is he one of those Kalpen Modi turned Kal Penn types? What could his real name be, to make it Nick Brown? Nikhil Brahmachari?
  
  
• What the hell was the OTT hang-upside down torture scene? And the Tony guy actually thought that it was a good idea to let a murder witness get away so "he can go and warn others about what happens to people who cheat in casinos"??? Hey bhagwaaaaaan!
  
  
• They blew up wayyyyy too many cars. Unnecessarily.
  
  
• I remembered the actress who played Kangana's mother from Pardes. Has anyone seen her in a movie where she does not play a snobbish super rich NRI?
  
  
• Pizzadude!! Even Hrithik Roshan can speak more Spanish than you now. Get on with it, lazybum!
  
  
• I have to agree with Shub that Hrithik looked like Jesus Christ in his bearded scenes.
  
  
• Looking at how short she was of time, I actually wondered why Linda bothered to put the ellipse (...) in her last sms. Seedha bolna tha na "OK bye". (I'm kidding about the OK bye. Must. Specify.)
  
  
• Did anyone else notice the similarities between Anurag Basu's earlier Gangster and this one? Forbidden love in a foreign country, the eloping, the violence, the fake passports and a near exact copy of the last scene, down to the post-death union? Come on, man.
  
  
• Yet another movie where the best friend dies. Sigh.
  
  
• Speaking of the post-death scene, the whole underwater thing was so unnecessary. It would have been nice to end the movie with the jump. Splash and finito.
  
  
• Viv actually said that he thought Hrithik would jump into the water in the last scene and find that Barbara is still alive in some underwater cave. *Thunk thunk thunk* I told him that if he were a movie director, only I would watch his movies even I would refuse to watch his movies.