Wednesday, December 21, 2005

No control!

I may play the fool most of the time, but I rarely play pranks. So when I discovered a ye olde text document saved on my computer as evidence of the last prank I played, I had no choice but to ask the 'prankee' for permission to post it on my blog.

This was in my final year at university. I was talking to my friend Rahul on ICQ. Suddenly, I saw this freshie Sanjiv at my door. He had come to pick up his dinner. (We used to get an Indian caterer to provide dinner for a bunch of people. The food was delivered to my hostel room every night, and everyone would come and pick it up from there.)

So when I saw the freshie at the door, I brb'ed Rahul.

By the time I got back on the computer, the evil forces in my head were already at work. I had decided to play a prank on Rahul.

I pretended to be a very lost and technologically-challenged Sanjiv on ICQ.

This is a copy-paste of the original transcript.

Of course, names have been changed to protect the identities of the hapless people involved.


Rahul 8/16/2001 9:02 PM gone?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:03 PM Sanjiv here

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:03 PM anha!!! howcome???!!! :)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:03 PM I mean Sanjiv here. I am Sanjiv.

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:04 PM Hi Sanjiv! wat happened to Sayesha! and how come u r snooping into other ppl's accts???!!! :)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:05 PM no I came here to collect my food from Sayesha. I order from jaggies

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:05 PM still 2 more qns unanswered...! :)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:06 PM no I am not snooping. she asked me to check because something was blinking at the bottom of the screen

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:07 PM hmm...:) Okhay...!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:07 PM so how are you?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:08 PM hehe... I am fine... thank u... How are u?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:09 PM I am ok. and I am still not snooping just checking my email account to see if there are any new messages

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:10 PM :) okhay... I wasnt accusing u...! Sayesha gone off?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:10 PM Sayesha is here only. She was watching a movie on the computer. Now I am also watching.

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:11 PM You are Rahul isnt it?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:11 PM //You are Rahul isnt it?? who did u think this was till now?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:12 PM no I was confused because on the screen I see Rahul with an eye. so I thought that I should confirm

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:13 PM The eye means I am invisible to ppl till I dont message them... and which movie u ppl watching?!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:14 PM but why are you invisible to people? We are watching the Sridevi movie

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:15 PM invisible to avoid ppl msging me for the heck of it... wat can u do when some 150 ppl are in ur list and half of them msg u...?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:16 PM you mean 75 people message you at the same time? Doesnt your computer crash?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:17 PM I said what if they do...? SO I remain invisible... to avoid unnecessary msgs...:)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:18 PM but tell me doesnt your computer crash if suppose you receive 75 messages?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:18 PM of course it wudnt!!!

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:18 PM and is Sayesha sitting there and enjoying this enlightening conversation the 2 of us are having rite now?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:20 PM Sayesha is sitting on the floor and eating her dinner. that is why I am sitting on her computer

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:20 PM and she knows we are having this wonderful conversation? :)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:21 PM no she is talking to her room-mate. she is hardly watching the movie. I think she doesnt like the movie

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:22 PM are you invisible?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:23 PM because you are not replying now?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:23 PM I am here...

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:24 PM are u invisible?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:24 PM I am not invisible once I msg u...

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:25 PM oh okay but when u just went off now were u invisible to me also?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:25 PM no, I wasnt... as long as u see me 'online' on ICQ, I am not invisible

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:25 PM ok, tell Sayesha this: Not to let other ppl use her comp and have fun with her ICQ...:)))

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:25 PM if u were some wicked chap with not so good intentions, u can really get her into trouble, cant u? :)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:26 PM what can I do with her icq? I mean I can only talk to u or whoever is not invisible only. Right?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:26 PM u can message some other chap some wierd stuff, cant u?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:26 PM weird stuff? what weird stuff? I dont know a thing about icq!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:26 PM I cant see u online on icq! does that mean u r invisible?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:27 PM I donno why... I am online... Did u tell her the thing I asked u to...? if not, tell her NOW...:)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:28 PM I did. She said "Sanjiv, write whatever u want to"

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:29 PM hmm... too bad for her... now u choose some random person online in her list, and send him/her some gaali... See, she has given u permission!!!!!!!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:30 PM tell me some gaali. I dont know what to write. And where is her list? I cant see anything. whenever yr message blinks I click on it

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:31 PM double click on the flower icon... u will see ICQ and list

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:31 PM can I come to your room will u teach me ICQ? Sayesha was saying she was going to your room later to learn some photo (photoshop) thing? Can I come too?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:31 PM ok, tag along...:)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:31 PM u mean the green flower? that doesnt look like a flower

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:32 PM yah, the green flower...

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:32 PM I clicked on it. It says sonique playlist editor.

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:32 PM nah, that's not it... another flower...?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:33 PM there is no other flower. there is a loudspeaker and a triangle with a head on it

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:33 PM else do this: Press Control + Shift + 'A' all together...

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:33 PM I think she doesnt have control key

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:34 PM click on the bluddy control key... left, down end of keybd!!!!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:34 PM there is no key that says control!!!!!!!!!

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:34 PM ctrl !!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:35 PM oh

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:35 PM u should have said "ctrl". You said "control".

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:35 PM is this the first time u using a comP? :)))

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:35 PM hahaha:)

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:35 PM no I use it in hall 7 computer room to send emails

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:36 PM hmm...! and u dont know the control key...!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:36 PM but I never use control key for emailing

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:36 PM I think hall comps dont have control key

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:36 PM shaddup...!!! EVERY computer has a ctrl key!!!!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:36 PM but the one in hall ??

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:37 PM IT DOES!!!!!!!!!

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:37 PM maybe I havent seen

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:37 PM yah, so say so... there are no comps without control key...

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:37 PM whats the meaning of the toilet sign here?

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:37 PM near Chetan's name on her list?

Rahul 8/16/2001 9:38 PM toilet sign???!!!


Yupp, that's the end of it. By then, Rahul was so exasperated that I felt sorry for him. You could see how frustrated he was, and was yet trying to "be nice to the freshie". Also, I couldn't continue because of the insane amount of laughing I was doing. So I had to stop this amazingly entertaining conversation. And guess what? Rahul was at my door in two minutes! I took a while to even open the door because I could not stop laughing.

<--And oh, if you're curious, this was the 'toilet sign'. The 'Occupied (Urgent Msgs)' mode. I always thought it looked like a raised little finger. Hence the name 'toilet sign'. :D

I don't think I had laughed harder in that entire semester.

I'm so glad I saved the conversation. Even now, four years later, every time I read it, it cracks me up.


Deeps said...

Just commented to win the gold medal :).

I've had some funny conversations over chat, but this one takes the cake :-D.

rimjhim said...

won gold...yet another time!!!!!

Deeps said...

tch tch tch Rinku I beat you by a millisec, I think {grins wickedly}..

rimjhim said...

tune mera record toda..
mai tera tape-record to dungee haha.....

Sayesha 8/16/2001 9:35 PM u should have said "ctrl". You said "control".

this was the best,,,
very hilarious post that is......:D

maza aa gaya,....!!

Deeps said...

mere paas tape-record he hi nahi :-D. Don't worry, me tumhe koi CD dedungi thodne ke liye, teek he?

Sorry Sayesha, for cluttering your comment box ;-) (actually I'm not sorry at all) :-D

bharti said...

hehhehe....hilarious...poor guy

Anonymous said...

e-ragging,huh ???!!!
may the force be with you,sanjiv...i sympathise..

Sayesha said...


Oops! Deepa took it! :P

Hehehe! :P

Haha! Thanks! :D

You guys have gone nuts, huh? :)

Raj Malhotra?? You're Raj Malhotra now?? Chick ka aisa asar ho gaya ki you've taken a north Indian name that you hate so much?? Chick is flattered! :)

ps: You're sympathising with Sanjiv??? Till this date, he does not know he was involved in the prank! If anything, I'd feel sorry for Rahul! :P

L said...

Messenger pranks are lot famous..!! But this was too mean of u ..!!

Kaala Kavva said...

shit sayesha tu mast hai
ive played pranks on people... but this was awesome

"you mean 75 people message you at the same time? Doesnt your computer crash?
mai to pagal ho gaya has has ke!!

Anonymous said...

Wow!! That was hilarious...I really pity Rahul...Wasn't he mad at you later on?? I wonder how he continued the conversation for so long...

"i think she doesn't have control key"

too good...

Anonymous said...

Oh God, that was hiLArious! :-)))
Hahaaaa. You played the role extremely well Sash!!
And your friend did seem to have a lot of patience! :-)

What's the toilet sign??? :D

Pujya said...

oh boy that was something...!!
u r friend is awesome..he is patience to handle you...or sanjeev..whatever!!

Adi Oso-Groot Finch said...

u r evil!! stay away from me.

Rays Of Sun said...

Bapre! lamba post hai..later:)

R said...

hahaa.. funny!!

Unknown said...

rotflmao!! ARE the 'original prankster'!

virdi said...


pagal ekdum pagal... total nut case... gone ekdum gone...

control key in the hall computer.... hahahahahahaha!!!!

bus yaar... bus...


Canary said...

i was abt to write dat ur post ws funny but hav to say virdi's laughter is funnier than it ! :p

Jina said...

ROTFL......hahaaaaa....n my tummy is painin coz i laffd so u give me compensation....

hey...have a fun christmas...and may u get lotsa gifts on christmas....

Chints said...

I'll be careful about not to read your blog in office anytime now.

A Sardar ji in office was looking at me the time i was reading it and 'controlling' my laughter. it was still manageable till I reached 'whats the meaning of the toilet sign here?'. That was it, couldn't control myself and burst out laughing and everybody in the office was just looking at me.

Sardar ji was very curious to know why I was laughing. Didn't know what to say so just said 'kuchh nahi, o ji meri control key gum gai hai'

sardar ji was looking at my face and I was just trying to get back the 'control key'.

educatedunemployed said...


Thanu said...

Too funny. I'm glad that u don't play pranks that often.

Rays Of Sun said...

Oh boy! ROTFL!! Just the stuff that I needed to read at the end of the day:) Thanks baby:)
I am laughing insanely and my labbies are asking me why am I laughing when I was frustrated the whole day today:))
P.S:- Reminds me of 2 ICQ escapades:O
But, the transcript is in my Mumbai home:( details kuch yaad nahi hai:)

Rays Of Sun said...

P.S // brb'ed Rahul//
Sounds like "brb-qed Rahul"
Bechara Rahul:))

Rays Of Sun said...

Baby uth! 9 min bache hai 6:30 ke liye:p

Rays Of Sun said...

Thanks for that info:)Who esle would have wanted to know it:D

Sayesha said...

Hehehe... Well, Rahul and I are still very close friends, so I guess the damage wasn't much :P

#Ze Exaggerator,
Hahaha! Shaabaashi type chapaat to me? :D

Rahul rocks! He wasn't angry at all. A bit taken aback, but then he had a good laugh too! :D

Yeah man! Gotta admit, Rahul had a lot of patience! :P

//What's the toilet sign???

I have updated the post to include that! :)

Hehehe... yeah! :D

Oye don't worry, you're not on my MSN or yahoo or googletalk. ;)

Tu har baar lamba post bolke nikaal leti hai! Arre Rahul se thoda patience seekh le! :D


#Vikram H,
Hehehe! Thanks thanks! :P

Oye pappaji paagal ho gaye kya? I can't stop laughing now! :D

I second that! :)

Thanks! :)

//kuchh nahi, o ji meri control key gum gai hai

Now I am sitting in office and laughing at your comment. Thankfully, it's only 8:23 am and there aren't many people around! :P


Naah, I don't. Some pranks can be really mean, and then people start crying... and it's all one big mess... so I stick to playing the fool instead... kuch toh play karna hai! :)

Chal baby tere chehre par muskaan toh aayi :)

//Baby uth! 9 min bache hai 6:30 ke liye:p

I know yaar! Saare comments padhne mein itni der ho gayi that I could not my early morn comment-replying ritual today. So quickly doing it at office before I start work! :)

//Who esle would have wanted to know it

Nahin re... am sure loadsa people must be curious ki yeh toilet sign hai kya??!! :D

Rays Of Sun said...

Waah!! pehlee baar you did not fado me:))) for my Toilet sign question:)))

Sayesha said...

Oye I only faado you when you kill jokes, you joke-killer natak company! :D

I just noticed that I missed replying to your comment! Thanks for dropping by! :)

Sahil said...

I'm surprised your Rahul friend didn't catch on. Sanjiv was a little TOO clueless. I can't find the "control" key it seems.

But then again, maybe Sanjiv was that clueless in real life. He sounds like the guy who would make you want to pull your hair out. Bechara Rahul. Kudos to him for his patience though.

And you missie. Haha - good prank! Shaabash.

Anonymous said...

Hahaaaa....saw the update. Hahaaa...
Sash.....kya naam deti ho tum....!Wah :-)

Anonymous said...


In my defense, it wasnt that I was clueless... just that there was something 'not right' about the conversation I was having... and until I was sure it was a prank, had no choice but to be a bit patient :)

"Toilet sign" was the limit... hence I landed at ur door to see whats going on ;)

We still need to say the name "Sanjiv" (well, the actual name) for either of us to burst out laffing :P

//"She's watching the Sridevi movie"
As Sayesha puts it - "Like there's only one Sridevi movie in the world and you would know which one he was talking about!" :D


Anonymous said...


Poor you man... I don't think I might have been able to show the same amount of restraint that you did in the face of all that 'ignorance' :P

I think I have an idea who Sanjiv might have been! :)

Sayesha said...

You'd be surprised at how clueless people can be. Me being one of them in my pre Internet-familiarisation days! :P

And yeah, the reason why I chose Sanjiv's name was because he really was a very seedha sadha clueless guy and Rahul knew that! ;)

//And you missie. Haha - good prank! Shaabash.

Haha! Thanks thanks! :)

Hehehe! :P
Tu bata, tujhe woh toilet sign nahin lagta? :O

Oooh people, Rahul's here!! :)

Kyun re Rahul, kasam khayi hai kya, ki you will only comment on my blog if I write a post about you?? :D

//We still need to say the name "Sanjiv" (well, the actual name) for either of us to burst out laffing

HAHAHA! I think if I bump into Sanjiv, I'll burst out laughing, and he won't even know why! :D

Btw, the Sridevi line is one of my personal favourites in the whole plot! ;)

//I don't think I might have been able to show the same amount of restraint that you did in the face of all that 'ignorance

You nerd!! :O :D

//I think I have an idea who Sanjiv might have been! :)

Heh heh! Email me the name, and I'll verify it for you! ;)

The best thing is, even if he reads my blog, he would have no idea that this post is about him! :D

Chitra said...

He he hoo hooo ha ha ha ha ... me cannot stop laughing !! Toilet sign ?? :) :) :) Heeeee hooooooo

Raj said...

//The 'Occupied (Urgent Msgs)' mode. I always thought it looked like a raised little finger.

You mean it not a raised finger? What is it then?

//u should have said "ctrl". You said "control".

i wud have definitely lost my cool of someone said that to me.

Btw, nice prank, prankster.

Sayesha said...


I have no idea what it is man! :O It cannot possibly mean 'gone to toilet'. 'Occupied (urgent msgs)' in toilet?? :D

Apart from the Sridevi line, here are two more of my favourite lines:

//tell me some gaali.

//but I never use the control key for emailing


Directhit said...

really funny :-) had a goood laugh!! sympathies to Rahul :-)

Vikram said...

That was freakin' hilarious. Hahaha

virdi said...


toilet sign... hahahahahahahaha...

teacher teacher toilet jana hai... hahahahahahahaha....

i am laughing like and idiot...


virdi said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Bhandari's said...

funny indeed.........

Sayesha this was too good to read :D

Sayesha said...

#Anoop S,

Haha! :D

Oye tusi sach mein paagal ho gaye ho kya?? :D

//i am laughing like an idiot...

You are an idiot, sweetheart! :)

#Peeti & Sachin,
Thanks! :)

MeAwinner said...

Me late..........:((

But its very-very -very Hilarious..
I am not able to stop my laughter... :D
HhahahhahahahahhahahahhaHhahahhahahahahhahahahhaHhahahhahahahahhahahahhaHhahah.......goes on..:D

Adi Oso-Groot Finch said...

oye... why change the post topic?

Sayesha said...

Hahaha! Your laughter is spillin' outta my comment space! :D

Arre waapas aa gaya? Rooth kar chala gaya tha na, ab kya hua? :D

This topic sounds better yaar... at least thoda sa toh pun hai... 'Sayesha or Sanjiv' was really yaawwwnnnn! :P

Priya said...

thts the funniest thing ive read ina loooooooong time!!
girl u jus ROCK!!
:D :D :D


Leon said...

It cracked me up too.. LOL.. I'm amazed at Rahul's patience..

But he should have known after all that talk of the control key.. Tsk.. Tsk.. Rahul.. :-)

The Girl Who Sold The World said...

LOL...what a fab way to harass a poor dude!He was really patient, wasn't he?
And that toilet sign thing was, pretty 'original'. It's great that I stumbled upon this blog. It gave me a much needed dose of laughter. :))

Sayesha said...

Hehe! :D

No man, Rahul is one of the gentlest souls I know. I have never seen him lose his patience or temper with anyone. Which is why I knew that I could get away with a considerable amount of annoying blurness without pissing him off :P

Hey, welcome to Sayeshaz. Glad you started with a laugh. :) Hope to see you around! :)

Deepa said...

That was a good one

Anonymous said...

Continuation of the same dialog:

S: I got a message, it says "Hit any key to continue"
R: Haan, to hit any key na
S: I can't find any key on this keyboard, even the hall computer does not have it
R: Any key matlab koi bhi key
S: Arre ... Any key bola hai .. aise hi koi bhi key dabane se kaise chalega?

And the story continues...

Vikram said...

new post! post!!

Sayesha said...

Thanks! :P

Geez! That's too much. Even the real 'Sanjiv' would be insulted to read that! ;)

Hehehe! Can't blog from work yaar! Will do tomorrow. Going out tonight 'cos my dear friend Sinnerman's in town!!!! YEAY! :D

Rays Of Sun said...

New posht new posht:D

Rays Of Sun said...

:O :O
Wow! Viks teree aur meree frequency bahut match ho rahee hai..I did not check the previous comments and wrote new post and saw you asked for the same! Voila!
Kya din aa gaye hain teree:)))
P.S:-Me lsitening to "Do-re-mi"=))

virdi said...

WHAT???? I am an idiot??? u are an idiot...

Thrbbbbrrrrtttttt !!!


Sayesha said...

Bacha seriously, kya din aa gaye hain tere... Viks ki tarah sochne lagi hai!

Actually, on second thoughts, I think it would be worse if Viks starts thinking like you! :D

Oye maar mat!! Sayesha, bhaag!! Vikram, bachao! :O

Achha baba. Hum sab idiot hain. Khush?

ps: Offo bachon ko manane ke liye kya kya bolna padta hai! :/

rimjhim said...


Shruthi said...

That was side-splitting!!! I have had some cool chats too.. but this one takes the cake!! :))) And I must say poor Rahul is amazzzingly patient :)
Have been reading and enjoying ur blog for a while.. but I just HAD to comment on this one :)

Rays Of Sun said...

Chal maaf kiya!koi baat nahi!
Am veryyyyy happyyyyyyyyy, isliye to bach gayee...
Imagine Viks getting senti and saying"ja main baat nahi karega"..Hahaha so funny and me saying "Kya Virdi BHAI kaisa hai"??:))

Gangadhar said...

haha ..How did i miss this post? lol

Sayesha said...

Baap re, itna pressure? :P
Naya post taiyaar hai :)

Great to see the silent readers stepping forward and introducing themselves! :) Welcome to Sayeshaz, and hope to see you around in the comment space! :)

Kyun itna torture karti hai re bechare Viks ko? :P


starbreez said...

Aiyoh, you're evil evil evil!

Sayesha said...

Yeah, I am! :D

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