Friday, April 27, 2018

X is for unknown (and hence you will have to put up with whatever song I put up)

Ok guys, I tried.

But there are no Hindi movie songs that start with X.

At first, I thought I'd cheat and feature that song from that movie Style and call it 'Xcuse me, kya re?' Or pick a song like 'Ek sawaal main karoon' and call it 'X sawaal main karoon', or 'Ek sapna maine dekha' as 'X apna maine dekha', but it all got a bit too... algebraic.

And then I thought — if I'm cheating, I might as well go all the way.

So I decided that X is unknown, which means this is a wild card song, which means any song will do, which means I could just pick anything from my very long 'almost made it' songs' list.

This song is from a 2012 movie called Aiyyaa, in which Rani Mukherji plays a Marathi girl obsessed with a Tamilian boy. She has bizarre dream sequences involving the two of them, such as the one featured in graphic detail in this song, a song that can only be described as Rani Mukherji's audition video for The Dirty Picture.

It's a pity that Aiyyaa released a year later than The Dirty Picture, because if this song had come out first, there was no doubt that Rani Mukherji would have been a strong contender for the role of Silk. Just check her out in the song and you'll know what I'm talking about. (By the way, isn't it delightful to see someone so out of her comfort zone and yet so comfortable in it?)

So the song starts with a normal-looking Rani Mukherji...

...before she transforms into...

THIS. 

If her actions are shocking you as un-Rani-esque, just check out these lyrics:


Dreamum wakeuppam critical conditionum
Hey earthum quakepum hil dul sab shakeupum
Face to faceum dharti putram
Top to baseum kama sutram

There is also talk of thunder thighs and mattering size. 

Thighsum thunderum 
Downum underum
Sizeum matterum
Thinkum wonderum

It only gets worse. 

Jumpingum...
Pumpingum...
Throbbingum...
Thumpingum...
Streelingum...
Pullingum...

Heart beatnum dhol peetnum
Love lust double kasht
Bada dheetnum


The two pictures below very aptly describe how many Rani fans reacted to this song. Shock and awe. Pure shock and awe. 





Yeh... body heatnum
Hot seatnum
Calling fire brigade bhi defeatnum

We must also take a moment to admire Prithviraj's mindblowing outfits in the song. Please, do not miss them. Well, I guess you can't. Even if you want to.

Enjoy this nightmareum called Dreamum Wakeupum. 




5 comments:

Arun said...

How about this, sung to the tune, Yamma yamma, yamma yamma, Yeh khoobsurat samaa:

Xena, Xena, Xena, Xena,
Kaisi phans gai Maa!
'X' se koi gaanaa na mili,
Random chun-naa padaa!

vinu said...

Ok, I was indeed waiting to see which song would be chosen for 'X' ! :) but this is an excellent wild-card!

Charan Deep Singh said...

1. I had slept off while watching this film
2. Second i was expecting a highly gif'able song. I thought you would pick title song of Mr. X (Emran Hashmi one)
3. I was in a similar situation as yours. But I found a way out and have listed all X words topic I didn't write on Today. After reading this post, one will never be scared of X. Read X words and other tough things

Anonymous said...

Ugh! This is worse than the Pahlaj Nihalani songs from the 90s!

Sayesha said...

Arun,
Wah wah Bollywood has a new lyricist! :D

vinu,
Thank you. :)

Charan,
You watched this movie? Wow!
Thanks, I might do 'You can call me X' next year. :)

chengiz,
A Tamilian friend of mine saw this and said that she can't decide whether to laugh or cry because of the truth in this song - apparently this accurately represents a LOT of tamil songs.