C is for comments

Recently, I wrote a post, fangirling over Coke Studio Pakistan. I'm still in that zone, listening to the songs day and night. The songs just don't leave me. They are in my dreams and in my head and now also in Xena's head because they're always playing in the background. (She knows Afreen Afreen, Uddi Ja and Ala Baali by heart, but gets all shy when I try to record her crooning.)

Though I have created a playlist of my CSP favourites, once in a while, I let the autoplay function surprise me. Sometimes, the surprises are so amazing, I have to look up from my work to see who/what it was, which made that divine sound.

Once in a while, I'll also scroll down to read the comments. The top comments are almost always from an Indian, and the replies to those comments almost always lead to a mini Indo-Pak war in the comments section. Sometimes, the language and words used by both sides leave a very bad taste in the mouth. (I've been to Pakistan and had the loveliest experience there, and I do have a soft spot for the people of Pakistan, so it really bothers me to see any kind of inherent hatred between Indians and Pakistanis for no reason other than just their nationalities.)

However, in the midst of all that hatred, there are many many comments that are witty and heart-warming and sometimes both at once. Last week or so, I started compiling some of my favourite comments to be made into a post, and they just happen to nicely fit today's C post!

Enjoy! (The teesra bhai from Bangladesh really cracked me up!)

***

I am a indian but i love this song a lot...

You guys are so good all you're songs are amazing. Indians love Coke Studio Pakistan.. Lots of love and friendship from India

This is the reason i can never possibly hate you. Love, India.

m so glad to see all love comments from Indians that's how we should be together

WOW I M FROM INDIA
RESPECT U GUYS
RESPECT UR COUNTRY
KEEP IT UP
STOP FIGHT

I'm a proud Indian Hindu Brahmin but this master piece has a universal meaning and truth. It is being played in my home every morning after Hanuman Chalisa..,!! 

I am Indian and kattar hindhu but this song have addicted me and I get energy from it

6k unliker must be Honey Singh type listener

very often witnessed comment from indians "' i am indian BUT i love Paki songs / music "' lol as if being an indian u are forbidden to love and respect and praise any thing paki ...

bhai tum india se ho ya pakistan se kisi ko farak ni padhta...music hai...kam se kam isme toh batwara na karo!

pehle Indians phr Bangladeshi phr Brazilians phr Kenya 2 3 saal or rukjao phr Mars se Alliens bhe yaha comment karahe hunge LOL

it's sad to see our people fighting even in the comments of YouTube videos. Let's accept each other for the sake of humanity and make love, not war. :)

Bhai music ko to baksh do ....yahan to india pakistan mat khelo...

Pakistan has more prettier talented chicks than our country :( !!!

haha in Partition Quade Azam was wise, he brought all prettier girls here and Gandhi Jee was kinda simple seedha saadha banda so could not think of that :P

You have aishwarya, Katrina, Deepika, Kareena etc and most Pakistanis are crazy for them! The thing is its ghar ki murghi daal barabar... In Pakistan Mehwish, Momina, Viccaji sisters, the top actresses like Mahira Khan and Ayeza Khan, newcomers like Hania Amir, all female actresses aren't respected or loved as much by their own people as they are by people across the border. So it's like you like our actresses and singers and we like yours 

Take Rahul Gandhi and KRK, give us some of your musicians.

All are yours, bro. No division between brothers. 

only one place where indian and pakistani guys saying love you each other. we should play coke studio in both countries parliaments. it might help.

I'm a grown ass man. But why does this song bring tears to my eyes?

As a pakistani, we've to admit that Indian people are lovely and open minded except few racists, the way they've appreciated the songs and performances of pakistani artists is just unbelievable

India aur pakis tan ki larai Dekhi nahi jati...

Toh mat dekh.

kya kahe rahe ho yaar.....is gaane me ladaaii kaha se aagaii...... zara aqal mandi dikhaao....na ki apni jahaalat


Massive respect and love for the Indian people. 

Love and positive vibes! From India

Love and respect from Pakistan

hey love to India and Pakistan from aapka teesra bhai (bangladesh)

Our PM : Narendra Modi and Pakistan's PM : Nawaz Sharif should hold their bilateral talks in a coke studio. Who knows it might help

damn, you pakistanis got some fuckin talent!! (let's kill the older generations and be friends again already!!) : Indian

I have to say this I love this song even though I don't understand a word 

Divided by borders united by music #Peace #IndoPak

The British destroyed everything.

Coke Studio should replace UN. It has helped Pakistanis and Indians come close to each other, more than United Nation can ever do in it's life span

happy to see us talking so nicely! :D #peace #From_India

tnx brother respect and love from pakistan everybody from both side love each other bcz same tradition same culture just border among us

India + Pakistan = Worlds Strongest Musical Power..!! (And Strongest Cricket team as well)

ONLY PLACE where INDIAN's and PAKISTANI's are sending LOVE to each other.

Play this song (Aafreen Afreen) at the border of Pakistan and India, we will stop fighting for 6 minutes and 40 seconds.

INDIA and PAKISTAN ke jang se pehle CS9 ka Finale dekh lo sab.


lol the amount of love between indians and Pakistanis in the comments section
even if 10% of this love reaches the border it will be enough to create peace of several 100 years :)

B is for books

For someone who was obsessed with books as a child, the number of books I have read in my adulthood is rather embarrassing. Appalling, actually.

In my school days, as soon as I'd get home from school, I'd pick up a book. It didn't matter that it was my fourth time reading it or the eighteenth time. It didn't matter what kind of a book it was; I was always surrounded by books. I grew up largely in small towns all over, and so whenever Dad would go to 'cool cities' like Bangalore or Calcutta on business trips, he'd come back armed with loads and loads of books. My sister and I would literally fling ourselves at the piles of books.

Unfortunately, when adulthood struck, for some weird reason I felt a total disconnect with books. It must have been the damn Engineering textbooks. Ruined me for life, I tell you.

I used to dread being asked the question, "So which book are you reading?" which some people ask everyone they know (or don't know, or just met). As if you're always expected to be reading a book. Hmmph! "I deal with enough books at work, thank you." This had been my (rather lame) excuse to myself all this while. Of course, when it comes to work, I'm surrounded by books, but they are curriculum-related. Textbooks, assessment books, revision guides, etc. Stuff that parents purchase and kids loathe. I possibly couldn't answer a "So which book are you reading?" question with "Oh, I just started on the Science PSLE Revision Guide. Deep stuff. Makes you really question the idea behind the PSLE. Also makes you die a little on the inside." or "Oh, I just finished Process Skills to Ace Your Science Exams. I feel like it has really helped my, er, process skills."

Of course, I've been reading to Xena since she was three months old, so that way, I've still been surrounded by books. But it's different. It is indeed joyful reading to/with her (and now, listening to her read to me for a change), but the joy comes from her and the process, not from the books themselves. I'm not reading them, or listening to them being read to me, for myself. Our weekly library trips are all focused on the books she'd like, books she'd find funny, books that would influence her in a good way.

Last year, when Viv's sister told me she's in a book club, I was quite psyched out. "And what exactly do you do in a book club?" I remember asking her. So she told me all about her book club sessions and even took me through some of the discussions they'd had on particular books. I suddenly felt curious. Interested. Maybe the book-loving part of me that I had left behind in my pursuit of adulthood had suddenly woken up from a deep slumber.

So when one of my neighbours started a book club, I was the first to jump in. I wasn't sure if I would survive it, considering we only get about three weeks to finish each book and with my work and Xena and thirty thousand household chores, I just wasn't sure I wouldn't end up at the book club meeting like Rachel from F.R.I.E.N.D.S talking about Jane Eyre, the feminist cyborg.

Well, surprise, surprise -- not only did I end up finishing the first book (Gone Girl) assigned by the book club before time, I realised I'd loved the feeling of getting back to books. I couldn't wait to read the next one. In fact, I started on another book before we were even assigned the second book. My book club meetings happen about once a month, and somehow, I've been able to find time to read two in that time -- one for the book club, and one for myself.

And when do I read them? Ah, good question. When Xena has her swim lesson, I sit by the poolside and read. When she's at her dance class (more on that in another post!), I plonk myself on a bench outside the classroom and read. Not having data on my phone really helps. When I'm out and about, with time on my hands, there is nothing else I can do but read.

And I'm loving it. I feel like that kid again who would rush home from school, looking forward to her books. I had, in fact, a rather alarming moment when once I managed to finish all my office work by 11:30 am, and I had about an hour before I had to go pick Xena up from school. Two choices faced me -- I could either get back to reading my book or I could watch an episode of Koffee with Karan (I'd not had any time to watch the new season at all). I started watching the first episode, and within 5 minutes, despite the presence of SRK (whom I worship) and Alia (whom I adore), I'd switched to my book. I couldn't believe it. I, the big Bollywood fan, had skipped KWK, the big Bollywood show with the big Bollywood stars, for... a book. Me?!

In many ways, reading a good book is like watching a movie by yourself in the theatre (in terms of the grandeur), but infinitely better. One, it doesn't seem like a sad thing to do (though I have to admit I have gone solo to the theatre rather proudly one or two times, but I did come out thinking that it would have been much better with company -- irrespective of whether the movie was cool or crap, more so if it was crap). With a book, solitude is not just welcome, it is necessary. Not only do you use your imagination to colour the story as you're reading, no one else is involved or interfering with the process, so there is no pressure to laugh, cry or show other emotions at expected places. You can feel and think whatever you want. You can go at whatever pace you want. You can love it or hate it or be unaffected. It's all between you and the book. It's also interesting how a book you love can be loathed by others, or vice versa. Makes you really think about how different people are from one another.

I'm loving this phase of my life. Xena seems mildly amused at the fact that her Mama now "has her own books to read", but I hope it's setting a good example for her. Once in a while, we sit down next to each other with our respective books and read. What bliss.

A is for Africa

So our first vacation this year was in... Africaaaaaa!

Okay fine, the truth is less exotic than it sounds.

We went to Mauritius for our 10th wedding anniversary, and to be honest, until I started planning the details of the vacation, I didn't even know that Mauritius was geographically considered to be a part of Africa. I always thought of it as something similar to the Maldives -- an exotic island in the Indian Ocean. Probably a part of Asia. So when I found out that it was "in Africa", I got really excited.

Even more excited was my mom because she'd never even dreamt that she'd have a chance to go to Africa one day. Instead of saying that she was going to Mauritius, she told her friends, relatives, neighbours and anyone who cared (or didn't) that she was going to Africa. (In my head, I could imagine her saying casually, "Haan, main woh zara Africa hokar abhi aayi.")

Oh, did I mention we planned the vacation as a full family affair? Parents, in-laws, sister-in-law, all inclusive! Unfortunately, due to a family emergency, the in-laws had to cancel their tickets at the last minute, but the rest of us made it. (Not my sister, of course, because Trump is now President and she should not leave that country until he's impeached and casually tossed in the general direction of Mexico.)

Mauritius was beautiful and relaxing. Travelling with the full junta party was, as expected, a mixed bag, but overall, we did okay. I think. Well, the fact that I'm already dreaming about the next full-clan holiday is a good sign, isn't it? It just shows that in spite of the insanity, it's worth it.

Here are five unique things I experienced when we were in Africaaaaa, okay fine, Mauritius!

The Air Mauritius inflight safety video
I loved Air Mauritius. Their flight attendants were inherently 'smiley' and I felt that their service was even better than Singapore Airlines (and that's saying something). However, their inflight safety video was, for lack of a better term, very odd. Kinda alarming AND hilarious at the same time.

So they show a family vacationing in Mauritius and simultaneously going through the motions of inflight safety. For example, they are shown donning their life vests, jumping off a cliff, and frolicking in the water in their life vests and blowing the rescue whistles with huge grins. Then, they are sitting under palm trees in their beachwear watching their kid make a sand castle, and suddenly oxygen masks drop from above, and they put them on. Seriously. I kid you not.

I guess you can say they are trying to make the safety video more 'watchable' by doing things a little differently? Injection of (questionable) humour? I really couldn't make up my mind about how I felt about it. Check out the full video below!

La Vanille Nature Park
Mauritius has tons of places where you can see animals, but I picked La Vanille for its giant Aldabra tortoises. Spanning 35 hectares, La Vanille is not what you'd call a 'zoo'. It felt more like a forest safari. There were tons and tons of animals, but the huge tortoises were the superstars. Just as spectacular as I'd imagined them to be!

We saw many, many tortoises from really close quarters. Many were older than 100 years and weighed about 200 kg on an average! The guide told us that they were very used to the human touch, and showed us how to touch them without losing an arm.

Dad's delight at the Mauritian flora 
Mauritius has a huge variety of plants, trees and flowers. HUGE. Everywhere around us were trees full of colourful blossoms. And though my dad is a retired banker, in his heart of hearts, he's a simple organic gardener, who is enamoured by anything that posseses chlorophyll. Oh, the number of times I lost it because he wandered off in the opposite direction, mesmerised by some unique-looking plant or flower or fruit! But in a way, it was heartening to see him so delighted at all the flora around him.

Contrary to what it looks, he's not harvesting cauliflowers in some random farm. He's giving Xena an impromptu lesson on cauliflower farming! 

Catamaran sunset cruise
On the actual day of our anniversary, I'd booked a sunset cruise with Catamaran, and it was surely the highlight of the holiday. Picture this -- we are on a boat without any life jackets, drinking wine, and the captain casually tells us to go sit/stand/lie down on the net fastened to the front portion of the boat. Directly above the water! At first, I was a little apprehensive (I'm a terrible swimmer), but my brave little sis-in-law took the first step and I just couldn't resist. Mom was flipping out. In fact, she was the only person who stayed in the covered part of the boat. Even my Dad succumbed to the pull of the net!

One of my favourite moments from the holiday

Of course, how could my mini-me be far behind? At one point, she lay face down on the net, peering through the gaps and excitedly yelling, "MAMA, I SEE FLOWERS IN THE WATER!" Umm.. corals. 

Xena's birds
Air Mauritius had given Xena a gift pack, containing a crossbody bag, a pack of flashcards featuring the unique birds of Mauritius, a cap and a set of colour pencils. (Take that, Singapore Airlines!) In no time, Xena had learnt all about the birds and was even quizzing my hapless parents on them!

There she is, giving Grandpa and Grandma a mini tutorial on Mauritian birds.

Her favourite bird was the Mauritian fody, and at one point she demanded that all of us start addressing her as Fody. She also gave Viv a nickname -- Dody (after the extinct Mauritian dodo, but modified to rhyme with Fody).

Even days after the holiday had ended, she was drawing and colouring pictures of Dody and Fody. It was so heartwarming.

If you're keen on more details about the vacation, I've finally finished the day-by-day account of our trip on my travelogue -- Hopscotch.

April is coming...

Sounds ominous, doesn't it?

It's almost time for the annual A-Z blogging challenge! That crazy month of April where some crazy people write a blog post every day of the month, except Sundays.

And yes, I'm jumping headfirst.

I think I'm past that stage where, come March, I'd wonder if I should do the challenge. Viv travels every April so I need to take over his duties of dropping Xena to school and brushing her teeth and putting her to bed at night, all of which eats into my work time (and work always seems crazier than ever before in April; Murphy is my chacha after all!), keeping me in a constant state of panic about what to post every day. But now I've reached the stage where I just calmly tell myself, "Of course you gotta do it. Of course there will be daily panic attacks. Of course there will be total chaos. But there will also be FUN. Think about that!"

Soooooo... here we go -- it's ON!

Are you joining the challenge? As a blogger or a reader?

Cokehead

I have been a fan of Coke Studio Pakistan since... forever. I don't remember what my initiation song to CSP was, but I remember my first thoughts: "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS? WHY IS THIS SOOOO GOOOOOD?"

Strangely, over the last few years, I've not kept myself updated on CSP. However, last week, this link popped up on my FB feed, and I couldn't help but click on it and then go on to listen to every single song listed there. Memories came rushing back, and I went straight to Youtube and listened to every song from Season 9. I went completely bonkers over Shamaan Pai Gaiyaan (soooo refreshing to see Rachel Viccaji get out of her backing vocalist seat and own the song like a boss!) and Uddi Ja (Uddi Ja initially took up a 3D2N residence in my head but now it's refusing to vacate!), playing them on loop all day long, until Xena protested, "Mama, I need to fill my head with other songs. Your songs have gone inside!"

(I know, right?)

Eventually, I stumbled upon 'Khaki banda' and after about two listens, I got the exact feeling that I'd got when I'd heard my first CSP song. "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS? WHY IS THIS SOOOO GOOOOOD?"

No, seriously. The lyrics, the music, the emotions, the singing (especially Ahmed Jahanzeb's voice -- HOW CAN ANYONE SING SOOOO WELL??? HOWWW???) -- it's the kind of stuff that can leave you goosebumpy and teary-eyed at the same time.

Viv didn't get why I loved the song so much, so I tried to explain to him how meaningful and humbling the lyrics are and how the song is about our ego and how we simply have no right to think of ourselves as highly as we do yada yada yada. He nodded along apprehensively, and I said, "I mean, the song title itself -- khaaki banda... is so deep and meaningful. Wait, you know what 'khaaki banda' means, right?"

"Of course," He said. "Policeman."

Okay, where's a pillar when you need it badly to thunk your head on?

Anyway, good things must be shared, so here you go -- be mesmerised by this mind-blowing piece of sheer musical genius. (Make sure the CC option is on, so you can get the lyrics AND the translation.)

Her word against mine

"Mama, is this cell farting?" Xena asked me.

I jumped. "Who? What? Where?"

"Here." She pointed to a page in the book she was reading. It was a cartoon showing the process of fermentation in pizza dough. A yeast cell was shown to be, yes, farting.

I was surprised that she knew the word. Contrary to what every parenting book and website suggests, I have not made any conscious effort to teach her the proper names of body parts and body functions. In fact, I almost fell down laughing when I overheard a lady in a mall toilet ask her 2-year-old if he wanted to "pass urine".

I know I know. It's high time. It's the right, safe thing to do. I should probably stop asking Xena if she wants to "pee" and "poop" and ask her if she wants to, you know, "pass urine" or "pass motion". (I think both of us will fall down laughing.) On some levels, it might just be the mommy in me hanging on to Xena's fast-disappearing 'baby-ness'. She still uses words like 'bum-bum' and I don't even have the heart to 'correct' her.

Yeah, so back to the 'farting' thing. It was not a term I thought she knew, even though it falls midway between the formal 'passing gas' and the informal whatever-she-called-it (I was about to find out soon).

"This..." she pointed to the 'cloud' near the yeast cell's bum-bum. "Is this a fart?"

"Yes, it is a fart indeed." I answered. "But tell me, what does 'fart' mean? Do you know?"

"Oh Mama," she said in a chiding voice, "'Fart' is just the English word for 'bum-bum burp'!"

Tooth and mail

My child looked different when I went to pick her up from school yesterday. She was also doing some kind of crazy, tribal dance, in the audience of an amused teacher, another parent and a couple of kids.

"I PULLED IT OUT!" She exclaimed the moment she saw me.

So, after more than a month of shaking, Xena's first baby tooth finally fell. Or like she says, "It didn't fall, Mama! I PULLED it out! In the middle of the Chinese lesson. Lao shi (teacher) said 'congratulations!' and helped to pack it for me in a paper towel. My friends hugged me."

Last night, she put the wrapped tooth and this letter under her pillow.

Thankfully, the "tooth fairy" had set aside a super shiny coin for the occasion. Phew!

Beauty queen

Amidst all the fun and frolic at the wedding I recently attended in India, there were some not-so-great moments as well. The 328764379642 relatives, for example, who demanded to know why I had lost SOOO MUCH weight (Ummm... I've been at 57 kg for the last 16 years so I don't know what they were talking about), or those who asked me if I didn't feed Xena at all (Yeah, I just love starving my child) and why she's SOOO underweight (Yeah, I enjoy the fact that my almost 6-year-old weighs as much as a 2-year-old).

There was even someone who told me that I looked "fine" when she last saw me but now I was "too thin". Well, when she last saw me, I was in Std VII and weighed about 40 kg, so I didn't know what she was talking about.

Actually, I didn't take it as body-shaming. I took it as a gross violation of the truth, and that's what annoyed me. (Anyway, I don't like the term 'body-shaming' at all, because I feel that a lot of people hide behind it, instead of getting off their asses and working towards achieving their own fitness goals and dream bodies.)

I ranted about all this to my sister who gave me a simple strategy to deal with it. "It's just something these relatives say when they see someone after a while. It's not coming from a bad place. It's just words that mean nothing." And suddenly I felt better. It was simple. I just needed to see them the way I see the counter staff at a fast food restaurant. They say "How are you?" the moment they see you, but do they really have any interest at all in knowing how you are? Not a chance. It's just that you're there in front of them and they have made eye contact and now they HAVE to say something.

So I learnt to smile and ignore.

But it did bother me when the comments were directed at Xena. "Why are you so thin?" or "You don't eat?" Much as I worry about her feeding issues and weight, and try to talk to her about it, I don't confront her so directly. I just tell her that she needs to eat a little more than she does now, so she can get stronger. The key word is always 'stronger'.

And of course, there are the other issues about 'beauty' -- skin colour and sharpness of features, etc., which unlike fitness, are out of one's control. As a kid, I had heard more than enough about my not-so-sharp nose and I'm glad I never let that get in the way of my confidence. It was laughable actually, how they were all so pleased to discover that the guy I had chosen to marry had a sharp nose. There's hope for the progeny then, they must have thought.

Well, guess what? Xena doesn't have a sharp nose by their standards. Actually I don't know and don't care what kind of a nose she has. So my ears pricked up when I heard this conversation between her and a relative. Luckily, Xena made my day with her response.

Relative - You must pull your nose a little every day. Like this. (demo) Then it will become sharp and you will become beautiful.
Xena - I don't need to. My mummy says I'm already beautiful because I'm happy. 

Sweet nothings

In early January, I had posted about the fact that out of curiosity, Viv and I had embarked on a 40-day no-sugar-no-alcohol challenge proposed by Ranveer Allahbadia (you might know him as the guy who helped Tanmay Bhat lose 110 kg). He recommended doing the challenge by going not only off added sugars, but also other things that taste sweet, such as juices, fruits, honey and jaggery for 40 days.

We started on 2nd January (after all the new year celebrations, of course!), but we completed it a little later than scheduled, and not with 100% honesty, I have to admit.

I had scribbled some rough notes to serve as a daily log, which I thought I'd share here.

Day 0
Sunday 1 Jan 
Invited friends over for a new year's lunch. Had margaritas. Emptied the fridge of all sweet items by the end of the day in preparation for the challenge. Whether all of it went into the trash or some into my tummy is a truth that shall never be revealed.

Day 1
Monday 2 Jan
Challenge begins! Easy-peasy so far. Just don't drink any alcohol and don't consume anything sweet, that's all.

Day 2
Tuesday 3 Jan 
Huh? This is it? Doesn't feel like I am on any kind of life-changing journey. The day has gone by without incident. This is too easy. I'm getting suspicious.

Day 3
Wednesday 4 Jan 
Accidentally and absent-mindedly popped a grape in my mouth and then back out, straight into the trash.

Day 4
Thursday 5 Jan 
Finished work a little early; had a sudden craving for my teh halia but resisted.

Day 5
Friday 6 Jan 
Had a family dinner at Cafe Iguana, one of our favourite restaurants, but didn't order their world-famous-in-Singapore margaritas; strangely, didn't feel like we were missing out.

Day 6
Saturday 7 Jan
The kung pao chicken I had for lunch in the Parkway Parade food court felt too sweet, definitely a lot, A LOT of added sugar in there; Xena's friend's birthday party in the evening, skipped the birthday cake, no big deal.

Day 7
Sunday 8 Jan
University batchmates' reunion lunch at Myra's at the beach; didn't order any drinks, though Viv terribly missed the Mexican beer that he invariably orders whenever we go there.

Day 8
Monday 9 Jan 
Found out that Haldiram's aloo bhujia contains added sugar! Whyyy?

Day 9
Tuesday 10 Jan 
Xena's friends had come over for a dinner play date; made pasta upon their request; had a chance to read some more food labels, it turns out that pasta sauce has added sugar of course, but guess what? Whole corn kernels in brine also contain added sugar! Again, whyyy??

Day 10
Wednesday 11 Jan 
Skipped the wine (considered mandatory) at my book club meeting. Didn't want to draw attention so sipped water from my wine glass, till a friend in the know happened to mention it, leading to a barrage of "But why??" questions. Got annoyed when someone else decided to answer on my behalf with something like "To lose weight, of course." I turned around and asked the person if she thought I thought I needed to lose weight. Uncomfortable silence and nervous laughter followed. Grrr.

Day 11
Thursday 12 Jan 
Accompanied Xena on her school excursion to the botanical gardens, had a Maggi mee goreng lunch near her school before picking her up, but scraped off the ketchup from the cucumber slices (ketchup has a crazy amount of added sugar). Skipped my usual teh halia to disapproving looks from Purshottam's colleague again. Had a play date in the evening at an indoor playground, followed by dinner at Mango Tree. The raw mango sabzi was heavenly, but it definitely had quite a bit of added sugar. Went home to check if other sauces at home had added sugar. Green chilli sauce did (oh noooooo!), but tabasco didn't. Ok so there is some sauce we can still have.

Day 12
Friday 13 Jan 
Had a slight headache, craved chai but didn't have it.

Day 13
Saturday 14 Jan 
A junior from my uni days was passing through Singapore, met her and her family for dinner at Myra's (the other outlet by the waterfront); Viv missed his Mexican beer again. I suggested that he could break his fast on day 41 with a Mexican beer.

Day 14
Sunday 15 Jan 
Had dinner at Ganesh Vilas; overjoyed to rediscover neer more, and the fact that that there was still a cool refreshing drink other than water we could have that didn't come loaded with added sugar!

Day 15
Monday 16 Jan 
Had a meeting at the office so made the trek there (I work from home on most days); had lunch near Xena's school before picking her up; decided to try teh halia kosong (ginger tea without sugar). Guess my review: (a) Not bad at all; (b) Hey, I actually prefer this! (c) Yuck. (d) REVOLTING. The answer was (d), of course.

Day 16
Tuesday 17 Jan 
Had a horribly sore throat, teh halia would have been awesome, but resisted from making it and sipped on warm water instead.

Day 17
Wednesday 18 Jan 
Had lunch at Purshottam's restaurant. My throat was still hurting so decided to try teh (tea) o (without milk) halia (ginger) kosong (no sugar) thingie this time after a sympathetic friend pointed out that it's the presence of milk in tea that begs sugar. Quite a mouthful for me to say teh o halia kosong in the right order, so I took my time saying it, but the guy repeated it so fast and so casually I figured people do order it then. But who?? And why?? As you can guess, it was just as revolting as the one on day 15.

Day 18
Thursday 19 Jan 
Woke up to a very sore throat and cough; went to the doctor who prescribed a VERY SWEET cough medicine, which I had once and then stopped because it felt so much like cheating; was literally dying for my homemade ginger tea; hadn't thought that the ease of doing this would be challenged so much just by sickness.

Day 19
Friday 20 Jan 
Someone had kept a huge bar of dark chocolate in Viv's office for sharing; he thought it was a great idea to send me a pic of it. Can I log this under mental torture by spouse?

Day 20
Saturday 21 Jan 
Half-way point done, yay! The chocolates just won't leave me though! Sis-in-law moved to our place today before relocating to India; she brought some chocolates from her fridge over; will save and eat at some point, I guess? Not that I love chocolate in general, but I can be partial to dark chocolate.

Day 21
Sunday 22 Jan
Hmmm... is it my imagination or can I feel my taste buds changing? Ordered my favourite massaman curry at Thai Express and could hardly eat it; the sweet taste was almost sickening; surprised how the sugar content had never bothered me in the past; today, it was overpowering; not sure if I'll ever be able to order the dish again; Viv remarked that even his clear Tom yum soup felt unusually sweet; didn't even know they put sugar in clear tom yum soup!

Day 22
Monday 23 Jan 
Uneventful

Day 23
Tuesday 24 Jan 
Was on a flight to Mauritius (we were flying the family there to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary), wanted to get a Coke (because I only drink Coke when I'm not the one buying it, i.e. in flights and occasionally at parties) but resisted. Felt a little sad that we were doing this challenge in the middle of a special vacation.

Day 24
Wednesday 25 Jan 
Our Airbnb host brought us a welcome gift - chocobars! With a heavy heart, I put them in the freezer. That evening, Viv suddenly said we should just take a break from the challenge and enjoy our vacation. 10th wedding anniversary is not an everyday event anyway, so I jumped at his offer. We had also booked a sunset cruise that came with wine, beer and all kinds of juices, which we were going to skip. Now we didn't have to, yay! But I did promise myself that we wouldn't overdo the cheat days.

[25-31 Jan: BREAK]

Day 25
Tuesday 31 Jan 
Landed back in Singapore; Fridge was empty so sis-in-law and I ordered lunch through Food Panda. The butter chicken felt sickeningly sweet. Again, not something I'd willingly order in the future.

Day 26
Wednesday 1 Feb 
Xena had declared that she also wanted to do the challenge with us. But of course, she kept forgetting. And then remembering again. It was hilarious!

Day 27
Thursday 2 Feb 
Viv declared that he felt that his tummy had become a lot flatter than before. I found no such difference in mine. Maybe because when he binges on sugar, he REALLY binges, but I take mine in moderation so the difference on the body wasn't that obvious.

Day 28
Friday 3 Feb 
Xena was actually turning down sweet stuff, not just at home but outside as well. I also stopped insisting when she turned down so-called 'harmless' kiddie food such as juice.

Day 29
Saturday 4 Feb 
Had a pot luck dinner with neighbours; usually we grab a glass of wine each and cook together; but this time I refused and told them why (lest they started congratulating me!); they were very surprised but seemed quite supportive.

Day [NOT COUNTED]
Sunday 5 Feb
My Chinese neighbour had invited us over for a Chinese New Year (CNY) tea party. She had a whole platter of CNY goodies and every single thing was sweet. There were six or seven items and she had baked them all from scratch! I didn't have the heart to say no and offend her, so I sampled a couple of them by splitting them with Xena. Decided to exclude this day from the challenge.

Day 30
Monday 6 Feb 
Looked through the food labels of stuff in the fridge; predictably, tom yum paste and balsamic vinegar dressing had added sugar, but to my surprise, the cheese spread that Xena likes didn't.

Day 31
Tuesday 7 Feb
Opened the fridge and Viv's Redbull can was staring me in the face. Burst out laughing and closed the fridge. Wonder who will drink it and when.

Day 32
Wednesday 8 Feb 
Uneventful

Day 33
Thursday 9 Feb 
I'm gaining a new appreciation for green tea and peppermint tea. I remember the time I ordered a peppermint tea at a restaurant and when I asked for sugar with it, the waitress looked extremely puzzled and said, "But it's peppermint tea." and I said, "I know. But I want sugar with it." (I do drain off the first brew when I make green tea though, to get rid of some of the caffeine.)

Day 34
Friday 10 Feb 
Uneventful

Day 35
Saturday 11 Feb 
I was on a flight to India! A cousin was getting married and I decided at the very last minute that direct flight or no direct flight, I was gonna grab Xena and go. It looked like I was all set to break the fast with some shaadi ki mithaai.

Day 36
Sunday 12 Feb
Was at my in-laws' place, and they are both chai-lovers. Mom-in-law asked if I wanted to have some, but she knows about the challenge so she didn't insist. I, of course, had to sit and watch them have chai. WITHOUT ME! :'(

Day 37
Monday 13 Feb 
Reached my parents' place

Day 38
Tuesday 14 Feb
We had a pre-wedding cousins' get-together, but it got late and my driver was ready to take me back home way before the drinking started. Felt like a teenager on curfew. It was sad in a way, but also worked out well because knowing my cousins, challenge or no challenge, they wouldn't have let me off without a drink or two.

Day 39
Wednesday 15 Feb 
It's the day of the sangeet! I'm running around between the bar and my mom and her sisters, bringing them non-alcoholic drinks. An aunt has placed a glass of mojito at my table for me, but it stays there all evening, ignored by me. The bartender does have jaljeera, but I take one sip and it's sweet and I let it go. 1 day to go! I can do this!

Day 40
Thursday 16 Feb 
It's the last day! Mom is making her tea with Stevia and I'm reminded of the need to be more vigilant about sugar as both parents have diabetes. I'm also reminded that I can have tea with sugar tomorrow!

Day 41
Friday 17 Feb 
What a day to have finished the challenge! It's the day of the shaadi! Yay! The first thing I did in the morning was make chai. Hadn't made it for so long that it felt weird; I felt like I had forgotten everything, that I was going to screw up. But I made it and it was goooood (even though I added less than my usual quantity of sugar) and even mom had a sip and said it was goooood.

Conclusion
Even though it wasn't a strict, continuous 40-day challenge, and at times I questioned why I was doing it, here are some of my self-discoveries and takeaways:

• There is an INSANE amount of added sugar in everything around us, especially drinks and restaurant food. I only realised the height of the sugar levels after I gave my taste buds a break from sugar. 
• Giving up alcohol is really easy. 
• It's not that I crave chai for the sake of chai. It's loneliness (or sickness) that makes me crave chai. 
• If you cut down on sugar, you automatically cut down on a lot of refined food items (maida, for example). 
• I need to find ways to keep up my love for baking by finding sugar-free baked recipes, or those with very little sugar. For example, I made wholewheat zucchini bread today (cut down the sugar in the recipe from 1/2 cup to 2 tbsp) and it was still really tasty. 
• I won't do this challenge again, but my awareness about added sugars is much, much more. 
• And lastly, the lesson learnt is this -- added sugar is DA ENEMY. Always know its whereabouts, and don't fraternise too much with it. 

A strange fairy tale

In what is probably the most exciting development in the life of an almost 6-year-old, one of Xena's teeth is shaking.

And so came up the topic of the tooth fairy again. She seems very sceptical about Santa now ("Mama, are you sure it was Santa who gave this to me, and not you? How does Santa know I like dinosaurs?"), but she still believes in the tooth fairy, from what she has read in books and heard from her 'seniors' who have already had 'visits'.

"Will the tooth fairy come when this falls?" She said, tugging at her tooth.

"Yes, she might. If you're good."

"XYZ in my class said that the tooth fairy will take the tooth and leave me a gift."

"Well, she will give you whatever she wants to give."

(Seriously? A gift for each fallen tooth? This 'tooth fairy' sure found it excessive.)

"Like what?"

"Erm, she might leave you a dollar coin for each tooth."

(I have no idea what the current 'going rate' is, but my plan is to leave a dollar for each tooth, so Xena can learn a thing or two about patience and savings.)

"What will I do with the coins?"

"You will collect them all and at the end you will have twenty dollars! You can use it to buy something you want."

She agreed readily. We have 'Konmari'ed' her enough to make her uninterested in too many material items. In fact, she's constantly worried that her room will get too messy if there are too many things, and keeps donating her toys away when they start to pile up too much.

"Mama... can the tooth fairy not take my teeth? I want to keep them. It's ok if she doesn't give me the coins."

"Err... possible. Maybe you can write her a note requesting her not to take your teeth? She might still leave you the coin though."

"She will read my note?"

"Yeah, just keep it right next to the tooth under your pillow."

"But how will she reply? I will be sleeping."

"She will write you a reply on your note itself."

"What will she write?"

["Noted with thanks" was what came to my mind.]

"She will tell you if she's ok with your request."

"But does she have a pen?"

"Uhhh..."

"Fairies have wands. Can she write with her wand?"

"I don't know. Can she?"

"Maybe not..."

"Well, she can borrow a pen from your desk." I suggested.

"That's a great idea, Mama!"

"Okay, all set then."

"But Mama..." she started, her brow furrowed, and I knew immediately that she was about to express her most important concern about this whole tooth fairy business.

"Will she put the pen back in its place after using it?"